Hello. I probably dislike you.

I use this account only for writing (usually scathing) reviews. If you are a moron, I will tell you, likely in a reduce-you-to-tears way. No one has ever accused me of being nice, and the future does not look so promising, either. If you are incapable of applying the rules of English grammar to your writing, constantly mmispelll wrods, 4get that u r not on im w/ ur gurlz, or lack the capacity to type anything longer than four letters, we can never be friends. If you leave the "authors" who fall into any of those categories positive, encouraging reviews, we can also never be friends. The same applies if your bio area is longer than your list of written stories. I am exempting myself because I have none of the latter on this site and therefore cannot qualify. If you are reasonably intelligent but know that your grammar/spelling/syntax/whatever is terrible and are in need of an editor, hit me up with an email.

Alright, I think I've started quite enough sentences with "If you." Onward, then.

I highly doubt that anyone cares, but in the interest of serving people like myself who've little better to do than read the bios of others I have prepared the following.

I do so love: liberalism, Rocky Gorge Reservoir, most art, music, feminism (the original kind), my Greek heritage, Italy, pigeons, honey sesame tofu, science, spanikopita, pineapple & onion pizza, decent poetry, languages and linguistics, Discover, Bill Bryson, the earth, ketchup, reading, oil pastel, pacifism, crossword puzzles, CNN, the environment, the Discovery channels, The Rape of the Lock, the sun, cooking, Smithsonian, autumn, nonfiction, sushi, geology, elvish, John Gribbin, World History, Barack Obama, Master & Commander, It's Academic, The Inferno, oregano, JtHM, soybeans, George Orwell, Galileo Galilei, bread crumbs, Orson Scott Card, Spongebob Squarepants, Jeopardy, and Edgar Allen Poe.

I rather dislike: Tim Russert, sports, Macs, Spanish V AP, carrots, charcoal, rap, most people, spring, Hillary Clinton, algebra, stereotyping, Pat Robertson & his 700 buddies, allergies, Verbatim CD's, Robert Frost, suspense, homophobia, Fox news, liver, poor grammar, Michael Steele, JD Salinger, wheely shoes, people who stand in the middle of hallways, cotton candy, the electoral college, organized religion, Mike Gravel, the Seasonal department, mayonnaise, pep rallies, idiocy, fossil fuel usage, the Bush regime, automatic can-openers, glitter, Christmas music, heights, Sci-fi, the fact that my palm pilot is broken, smoking, Dan Brown, and hypocrisy.

I have an account on fiction press, as well. Congratulations to you if you can figure out who I am. I would also say that if that is indeed the case, you probably need to get a life.

Laria