Hey peoples!

I'm a hyperactive person who can go absolutely nuts on too much red cordial, if you get my meaning. I am a 18 year old girl so my mind is a horridly messy place and it's ramblings should not be inflicted upon any one. Except those that believe that they may enough 'moral fibre' to handle such things as sugar highs and mood swings that make manic depressives look stable.

Any who, I mainly write my charming stories (reader scoffs hystericslly) late at night because I'm an insomniac and have nothing better to do with my time (which is really true now seeing as I've finished school). And I mainly like LJ fics cos we know the least about how there relationship went and you can easily make it up, good that!

I have a extermly over active imagination (very hard to control) and a devious ego (even harder to control) not a good combination cos it leads to me write completely out there stories and expect nice reviews (reader rolls eyes)

So please be nice and don't throw rotten fruit at me if you don't like my stories. I understand different people have different tastes but there is no reason to become vindictive (that's the ego talkimg, he's rather sensitve, the poor petal)

There won't be any slash in my stories because I have no reasonable idea how to write it and I'm not entirely comfortable about writng it but I have nothing against those that do. I read just about any LJ fic soI have reviews all over the place. WellI hope you like the stories because I sure like other peoples

The Weird (Definitely) and Wonderful (Doubtful)

Me (but you can call me Jenny or Jen, whatever)

Okay soI have been asked a few qustions in reviews that I will get around to answering in this area

Q. Where are you from?

A. I am a proud resident and citizen of the Land of Oz (known to all sane people of the rest of the world as Australia), yes we are a cultureless lot (at least in the eyes of the English) and believe me we have some weird traditions but I do try very hard to keep modern, Australian references toa minimum and keep in English character

Q. What do you mean it's not summer?

A. Seeing asI live in the only western counrty in the southern hemisphereI suppose that could be classed as a valid question, you see due to the earth tilting on it's axis, it's always done this by the way don't be alarmed... be alert! (Sorry, couldn't resist, any Australian readers will know what I mean), different hemishpere's are exposed to more sunlight and therefore warmer weather at opposite times. So when the northern hemisphere is experiencing winter, the south has summer and vice versa, we usually take the mickey out of the miserable weather in true Australian style by having Christmas in July, an excuse to eat and drink excessively, we leave out the presents though ...I hope that helps some peoples confusion - Hey this just shows that I did in fact listen during my geography lessons despite what my teachers say

Q. Is it still July or is it December or someother wintery month?

A. Yes, it is still July, even though we're upside down we do follow the same calender as the rest of the western countries, it may be the Land of Oz, complete with munchkins but no we don't have our own calender system

Q. How on Earth do you blow up a toaster?

A. I can honestly say I have no idea how I manged it. The toaster just sort of went fizzle, fizzle, spark, POOF! Not at all my fault, honestly. All I did was plug it in, pop in my two slices of bread and push down the button... god's honest truth! All right so I MAY have dropped it a couple of times in the past and yes, I am known to play with the controls while it's working, which in all honesty can't be the best thing for it but well that could happen to anyone right?... I think we shall just have to treat this as yet another excellent example of my klutzy, accident prone personality.

The matter of how you blow up a toaster is still very much a mystery to me as it is to any one else.

Can I just mention...

1) The most entertaning death threat I've had yet is death by plastic spoon, it sounds painful but I know from personal experience that it's possile... I love imaginative death threats, they lift up my day, I think that says something about my morbid sense of humour

Oh my god!I just got threatened with a "beloved breadstick" - Spix, you just made my day

2) Absolute Shocker is NOT a Remus and Lily fic, this has come up a couple of times but NO Lily and Remus will not end up together.I thinkI made it pretty clear they are just good friends, nothing more... it's Lily and James all the way baby

3) People the full stops in Absolute Shocker are going to continue to be abvsent so deal with it! It's my style of writing, a stream of consciousness sort of thing. That is how I am writing it, it has nothing to do with grammar, as you may or may not have gathered from this page that is my writing style and I am not going to change it. If it botheres people so much copy the story paste it into Word and add in the full stops yourself! Simple!

4) I'M GOING TO THE UNITED KINGDOM - that's right I'm packing my bags and departing from the shores of my beloved OZ and making my way over to the realm of my ancestors. I plan to take up residency on the lovely Brittish Isle for a good five months - that meansI will have wondorous adventures roaming the european countryside and also limited computer access. I plan to finish Absolute Shocker before I go and then I will continue to write in my handy dandy notebook while I'm away - hopefully this plan will work, if not.. I'll work it out when I get to that. I CAN"T WAIT TO GO! Did you notice?

Hi Everyone! I'm BAAAACCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKK!!!!! Aren't you just so glad to see me? Hmmm that's what I thought, you really couldn't care less so long as I update, which I promise to do more often. Though just a warnign I am about to bugger off to Uni so yes I hope to finish Absolute Shocker before then but we all know what I'm like with my time management, but I can dream people, I can dream