HAY.

My name is Allyson the Great/PinkPantsPrada. You, however, may call me whatever you like. Including rash words that might make some mother's condemn you to Hell. :D

anYYWAY. Welcome to my fanfiction profile. I am gracious of your cyber-technology presence. It makes me giggle. Cybergiggle. Like this - giggle. See? Wow, that was so effective.

Notice I've been a member of fanfiction.net for like, five years, and I have like... Two fanfictions? Yeah, that's called laziness, and lack-thereof imagination. So save me with yours, so I won't go into cardiac arrest. Or die. Or... Quit drooling over Snape. Man, Snape is sexy...

Yes, I do wear pink pants. Where else would the inspiration come from? They're so stellar. Seriously, if YOU saw my pink pants, you hemmorhage and die of the shame that you don't own a pair. Really. Pink pants? Who doesn't want a pair, for the lord of all Jalapeno slices? Oh chyess.

So, need some information on the PPP before you? For sure, I wrote this stuff up when I was like, 12. I was such a kniving little trimble child.

Name: Allyson the Great.

Birthdate: January 17th. Uahhh.

Age: Old. Getting older every day. Old enough to drive, be trialed as an adult, and young enough to wear pink pants without people rolling their eyes at me. I look young, so they tell me... Outsiders I've never met before: "How old are you, 14, 15?" Me: "Erm... Thanks, but no thanks."

Height: 5'5''. I'm sadly the shortest person in my family. Dumb. My 14-year-old sister is taller than I am. Yuck.

Favorite Color: Silver. Red. Though I'm picky with my reds...

Favorite Sport: Longboarding, (if that's considered a sport... I did it all last summer. It was bomb.) basketball, tennis, baseball... I'm pretty darn good at sports. Yay, for lack of modesty! Too bad I don't care too much about them. I used to be a huge baseball fan - huge fan of the Arizona Diamondbacks and the Anaheim Angels. I lost interest, obviously. God: "Hey, Allyson! I bestow upon you talents of sports and athletics!" Me: "Hey, hey! Thanks God, but I'm not gonna pursue with them! :D"

Favorite Drink: Coffee, soy milk, water, energy drinks, caprisun, your mom... You know, the usual.

Favorite Books: To be honest, I rarely ever read. Like, ever, despite how many good books are out there. I love the Harry Potter series by JK Rowling, obviously. The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas, Enchantment by Orson Scott Card, Ender's Game by Orson Scott Card, The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde, Twelfth Night, and Interview with the Vampire by Anne Rice. Luffly. :D

Favorie Movie: Edward Scissorhands, The Butterfly Effect, Zoolander, The Labyrinth, Nightmare Before Christmas, V for Vendetta, Alpha Dog, The Death and Life of Bobby Z, Willard, Hook, The Labyrinth, She's The Man... I can't think of any others, but I know there are more. Obviously.

Favorite Bands: You know, I used to be HUGE into music and whatnot... Now, not so much. I'm not easily impressed by bands nowadays. My list has downsized... By a lot. But anyway, a few of my favorite bands nowadays are... AFI, The Bravery, Muse, 30 Seconds to Mars, A Perfect Circle, Snow Patrol, Everybody Else, Big Surrender, We Shot the Moon, I Am Ghost, In Flames, Social Distortion, Jonas Brothers, (I know, and I'm not ashamed. I'm not a big fan of THEM, exactly, but I like their music. Joe is a douchebag. But Nick and Kevin are cool. Their songs are so fun to learn. Especially if you're playing for a large crowd on an acoustic.) Sherwood, Skillet, The Rasmus, and Thirteen Senses.

Random facts about me: (Boredom... As usual. Not that you really care. You will now though. Ha.)

1. I enjoy caffeinated drinks, such as coffee. I've tried every energy drink out thus far. I'll pretty much drink anything - even if it tastes like battery acid.

2. I'm a pirate. Duh. Any other categorization, such as a ninja, could NOT pull of pants like these!

3. I love, love, love House MD. I've been watching it for five years now. It's ultimately my favorite show. Ever.

4. I don't watch any other TV show - besides the occasional BONES and Desperate Housewives. I just don't watch a lot of TV in general, to be honest with you.

5. I can play the harmonica and the guitar. Not at the same time. I'm not that cool.

6. I use the term ‘gay’ a lot, though I know it might be offensive. I also use the terms "your mom" and "That's what she said." I'm a teenager, go figure my naivety to speech.

7. I was once an avid longboarder. But sadly, where I live, I cannot longboard year round. I'm going to embarrass myself this summer when I try again. Teehee.

8. I enjoy strange pairings - like Snape and Lily. Even though, it's CANON! That's right, jerks! I knew it ALL ALONG that Snape was in love with Lily! Eat that, hoebags, who couldn't believe anything like that! I think Lily had a thing for Snape too. Because... "The intensity of his gaze made her blush." That's right. That's right.

9. Allison Cameron from House drives me up the wall. Literally.

10. Edward Cullen from Twilight is possibly the worst male character to ever exist in the literature world. I am not impressed by him, the Twilight series, nor Stephenie Meyer's writing. In my opinion, the book lacks originality, depth, thought, intelligence, and talent. It's just not that good, sorry kids. If I were to read a vampire book, it'd be one of Anne Rice's novels. Lestat could have beat the shit out of Edward any day and still have time to look good. Man, Tom Cruise was HOT when he played that man...

11. Though I hate Edward, I LOVE Robert Pattinson and have since Goblet of Fire. Really, he is too cute to be playing creepy Edward Cullen.

12. I'll probably meet Davey Havok of AFI someday. I used to love him as a kid, but now, not so much. However, I do believe I will someday meet him. Regardless of whether or not I'm a huge fan of him or not anymore.

13. I love River Phoenix. Unregretably. Shame he died so early. I wish I'd have been an 80's kid just so I could have been a fangirl at that time period.

14. Severus Snape is easily my favorite character from Harry Potter and my favorite character in the literature universe ever. Honestly, I've been rereading the books, I was sitting in class, and all of the sudden I just started laughing. This girl named Katie looks over at me, "What?" I'm laughing, "do you like Snape?" Her reply was simply, "of course! He's horrible, but I do!" Exactly. You have to love Snape. He's so awesome!

15. I watched web-videos like Charlie the Unicorn and PotterPuppetPals LONNG before they were popular. Try like, five years ago. Now they're popularity is sickening to me. EPIC FAIL, webvideos! EPIC. FREAKING. FAIL.

16. I call people ‘suckers’ a lot. And other such rude terms. Especially when they fail to do something. My coworkers endure hell. :D

17. My friend Squirreli and I had a three hour conversation that lasted from 10 pm until 1 in the morning how we think Edward Elric is a sissy. We also think he should rust, and I should get automail eyeballs. Scar has a lot of jackets for a homeless man.

18. I am an Envy, from Full Metal Alchemist, fan. He amazes me. :D

19. I think guys are hot. Unless they are ugly. But I also believe that people are not born ugly. There are those who choose just not to take care of themselves, and therefore, it makes them ugly. Wow, what a totally overused word. Hey Allyson - learn some new vocabulary, you stupid whore.

20. I am a female. Hopefully you knew that.

21. I have but one measly sibling. I call her Kleenex. She freaks me out. She steals my pants. She was an accident child, as I am so keen to remind her each time we argue.

22. Children scare the hella out of me. I will most likely not have them. D:

23. My other account on this site is Amethyst Aizen. Don't ask me why I have two - I just do. This is the only one with fanfiction though.

24. I generally don't read a lot of fanfiction, so feel real special if I happen to be reading yours. :D Occasionally, I'll just have a huge hype for fanfiction and I'll go crazy and read lots. It's totally intense.

25. I enjoy slider cell phones. They make me giggle.

26. I have really odd eyes. They're green, like, a dark green. It's creepy. Everyone mistakes them for hazel or brown, despite the fact that there's no brown in them. It's very sad and very frustrating.

27. Edmond Dantes from The Count of Monte Cristo is my second favorite fictional character of all time. He's almost neck-to-neck with Snape. So awesome. And I'm talking about Edmond from the books. Edmond from the movie was a wuss boy. Edmond from the book was a creepster mastermind of maliciousness doom. Thus, go novel Edmond Dantes! :D

28. Riza and Roy will get together. They will. Even if I have to hunt down Hiromu Arakawa. They will get together! I promise you. >D Damn, chapter 94 was hot...

29. If I could have one woman crush in the world, it would be Olivia Wilde. Seriously, she makes me wanna strangle a mountain lion, she's so hot. She could be watering a PLANT, and still make it look sexy. Not to mention, her cheekbones could slice furniture. And I'm certain it was HER CHEEKBONES that sunk the titanic. She's made cheekbones violent since 1984. No joke.

30. I have a sharp love for hooked noses... Ah, Snape. What a babe.

31. I think James Potter was an utter douchebag who deserved to be killed by Voldemort. Seriously, he WAS the Gryffindor version of Malfoy. I'd honestly partially blame him for the reason Snape joined the Dark Arts. He screwed up any friendship Lily and Snape ever had. Masochistic arrogant jerk.

32. I work when I'm not at school, writing, or going crazy with the people I am proud to consider my BFFAEAEAE's. :D

33. If I had to choose a second woman crush, it'd be Emily Deschanel. If I had to choose a third woman crush - it would be Keira Knightley. Yay for woman crushes!! I am, undeniably, hella straight though. Olivia's definitely hottest though. And I loved her LONG before House! Really. I did. Man, she was also a huge hottie on The OC...

34. In my opinion, Harry really wasn't that great of a wizard. Like, ever. He was pretty good at hexes - after long, long, long practice. Harry was a pretty weak main character, imo. Go Team Snape! And McGonagall... And Luna... And Dumbledore. Mm, Dumbledore.

35. Team Edward? Team Jacob? I'm Team Volturi! Jane would be a hero of mine if she wasn't in Twilight.

36. If I were to attend Hogwarts, I would be a Slytherin. I know it's awful, but it's true. That, and I'd probably pull off a pretty good Ravenclaw. And I guess I have some Gryffindor tendencies too. No Hufflepuff, though. I'm not a Hufflepuff in the slightest.

37. I don't like Malfoy. It's true. Snape, Luna, McGonagall, and Dumbledore are my favorite characters from Harry Potter. Screw Ron, Hermione, and Harry too. SCREW THEM.

38. I'm not a huge fan of the Marauders either. They were pricks to the bone. I didn't even like Sirius all that much. I pretty much disliked them - besides Lupin. I rather heart Lupin. :

39. KUTNER IS DEAD. WHAT THE HELL IS THAT. DDDD: I knew it was gonna happen, but, still. . . "Eric! He's cold!" D: Kutnerrrr... I miss you. No joke kids, I'm getting teary eyed just thinking about it. "Can we have a Secret Santa?!" Literally, I started bawling.

40. If James Wilson ever leaves the show of House, I'll stop watching. House would be nothing without the bromance.

41. The Twilight movie was soo much better than the book. Sorry, it 'tis so.

42. I'd choose to be with Jacob any day over Edward. It's the truth. Where there is an immature boy, there is a personality. That of which Edward consists none of.

43. I have a disgusting crooked smile. One that could beat Edward's up.

44. Oh! Oh! OH. Third favorite fictional character...! Is Jareth, from The Labyrinth. Man, Sarah was insane for turning him down...