Quotes

Suicide is a way of telling God, "YOU CAN'T FIRE ME,I QUIT!"

Life can only be understood backwards but it must be lived forwards

Our greatest glory consists not in never failing but in rising every time you fail

Never let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game

Life isnt measured by the number of breaths we take but by the number of moments that take our breath away

I was born intelligent but education ruined me (cough, Sarah, cough) my friend told me that one...and its true for her!

Inside every old person there's a young one-wondering what the heck happened

Men, chocolate and coffee are all better rich

No one is a failure if they have friends

It is better to have loved and lost than to have not loved at all

The brave may not live forever but the cautious do not live at all

Hope is never lost, only found

"Be very careful if you make a woman cry, because God counts her tears. Woman came out of a man's rib. Not from his feet to be walked on. Not from his head to be superior. But from the side to be equal. Under the arm to be protected. And next to the heart to be loved..."

Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up

People may not remember what you said, but they will always remember how you made them feel

Few woman admit their age; fewer men act it.

Don't drink and park; accidents cause people.

I'll be sober tomorrow, but you'll be ugly for the rest of your life.

Those who think they know everything annoy those of us that do.

Every time I say the word 'diet', I wash my mouth out with chocolate.