Name: i would tell but you would just be confused.

Born on October 14th

Born in Surrey England but was so rudely moved to america and is now desperate to return.

I love(to):

Play my guitar

listen to music, i literally listen to it round the clock

movies; i see a ton of movies

I am a big arty-type person i do pottery, draw, and paint abstract impressionism and have recently begun renonaisscance sort of style portraits. the works i like and inspire me, are Pollock, Klein, some of Richters stuff and so on and so forth my dad and my art teachers really help me so if for ever reason they ever come across this which would be incredibly creepy and weird thanks to you.

and Much much more...

things that i don't like:

Rap music; you spend more time deciphering what they say than actually listening to the pointless stuff.

people who think there better than you; by sure say your the best but don't say another is not the best.

my neighbor; i swear i will wring her neck one of these days.

american football: it is a bunch of men running around a feild in crash helmets and ballet tights need i say more.

Things you might want to know for your own sanity;

1) i often second guess myself i am a completely undecided person or am i?

2) i often insult people but i don't mean it or well sometimes i do but i don't usually.

3) i don't approve of animal testing and don't even get me in an arguement over it. ive done too much research for you to make a huge point against it.

4) sometimes i appear selfcentered (which i really hate) but really i am not, well... i just have a problem where i use the word i to often i can't help it if i like to talk about interesting things...

5) i am incredibly disorganized and cluttered for instance i have lost a guitar in my bedroom which is only about 7feet in length and width.

6) i am an artist and am really devoted to art soon i hopefullyam going to expirement with fire and a canvas; painting with fire should be fun or a death wish we shall see...

7) i am a musician as well and i have really strong opinions about what music is goodmusic (though others opinions differ and i fine with that if you have a reason to back it up)

8) i either never talk or talk not stop as you can probably tell from this profile.

9) i absolutely despise the media and consumerism it is all so fake i just want to rip it to pieces and Shove it six feet under. So those reading this do everyone a favor and be your own person and don't buy in. just so you know all those ads you see in magazines and such are enhanced and edited with computers aka none of it is the real thing so don't believe it all it is a bunch of overpayed people skiving money off you and manipulating your minds.

10) i love to rant and ramble especially about what we could do to actually better the world yes i am a person with a cause.

11) alot of people find me comical for instance i can just walk into a room and my mum will start laughing. and i ask her what are you laughing at and then between hysterical fits of laughter she'll answer 'YOU'

12) i am not afraid to be who i am in fact people want to be me. lol. yeah right but its true not the second part but the first. or maybe the second and not the first?

13)i sometimes have the tendency to mix up my historical facts such as George washington rode the deleware in the vietnamese war. i know the facts i just have trouble getting them to come out right really i have never failed a history exam and have never studied for one either.

14) when i talk my words are often messed up and i often hear the word "WHAT?"or SLOW DOWN because otherwise people end up triving drucks, dashing wogs, fealing sish...

Music worth my time:

Rolling Stones, Meatloaf, The Jam, Greenday, Pearl Jam, Jet, Sugarcult, Keane, The Killers, The Darkness, Blink 182, U2, Queen, The Proclaimers, The Beatles, Statis Quo, Cher, Dire Straits, Phil Collins, The Who, Sex Pistols, Smashing Pumpkins, Tears 4 Fears, The Monkees, John Mayer, The Vibrators, The Strokes, The Clash, The Ramones, The Adverts,Sacred Souls, Pixies, Echo and the Bunnymen, Aerosmith,Carlie Simon, Partridge family, Joy Division, Pulp, Blondie,Vingellis, New Order, Talking Heads, Radiohead,TheDoors, the Arcade Fire, The Dead Sixties, The Police, Jeff Buckley, Bryan Adams, Franz Ferdinand, John Lennon, Paul McCartney, Pink Floyd,The Hives, The Velvet Underground, British Sea Power, The Pretenders, Spoon, Wire, Coldplay, the Kinks, The Stooges, The Cars, B-52's (their music video for Dance this Mess around is utterly hilarious to me), The Dictators, The Only Ones, Yeah Yeah Yeahs, The Buzzcocks, Kaiser Chiefs, ABBA, South, Arctic Monkey's, The Carpenters, Aretha Franklin, Billy Joel, Frank Sinatra (have you ever seen an impersonation of him there freakin cool to watch), Bon Jovi, Bruce Springsteen, carl douglas, DAFT PUNK, REM, Dashboard Confessional, Enya, Ultravox, five for fighting, hans rag hans, howie day, james blunt, nick lowe, the La's, wolfmother, kate bush, Elton John ; shall i continue cause i can you know...

Films-

Pirates of the Carribean, Batman Begins, Harry Potter Movies, Lord of the Rings Trilogy, Day after Tommorrow, Eizabethtown (it is one of those movies that gives you the meaning of life and the sudden need to make a scrapbook), Zorro, The Legend of Zorro, Pride and Prejudice, Benny and Joon, Whats eating Gilbert Grape, Edward scissorhands ( i luv it for its crappiness), alfred hitchcock films, the guardian, any good action movie, or comedy. my favourite comedian is Eddie Izzard utter and complete genius, and hilarious too, highly reccomend his humour.

Books: The year of the Secret Assignments, Gospel According to Larry, Vote For Larry, Saving Francesca, Lord of the Rings Trilogy, Sons of Fortune, Honor Among Thieves, False Impressions, The Named, The Dark, The Key, To Kill a Mockingbird, a Walk to remember, Pride and Prejudice, How Soccer explains the world, and save the best for last ...THE HARRY POTTER SERIES!

Sports:

Football: (or to you americans soccer- small rant why do you call it soccer i mean do you play it with a soc? i didn't think so...) i support MAN U to the fullest, though if their not playing at the time i am known for supporting Liverpool, but i will most likely watch any match unless the referee is being a complete prat then ill still watch it but will to busy swearing my head off to pay much attention to the match. my favourite players: Neville (luv him to bits) Peter Crouch (those lanky legs and adorable face), Rooney (he may look like shrek but man can he play beautiful football), Becks (everyone has a spot in their hearts for good ol' becks) Gigg's, Van Da Sar ( think i spelt that one wrong but awesome keeper and adorable face),Robinson ( he may have made a fool out of himself a few weeks back when he let in that ridiculous goal for england but other than that, pretty decent goalie) ... i can not stand Chelsea or Arsenal they are a bunch of arses...

Rugby: i support Englands team. though in the heineken cup i usually go with a club team that i think look pretty decent. past heneiken cup i was rooting for Munster (ireland) who beat the french in their first win of the henieken cup! congrats to them! Can't wait for summer of 2007 in France RUGBY WORLD CUP!

cricket: i love to play, not so much watch it being played though.

Dancing: i love to dance even though i am probably the worst dancer ever as i am the clumsiest person ever i can literally fall over standing up straight. i take dance through school but i am known for falling off the stage more times in one dance than any other person.

Favorite Foods: I like to eat Jam, peanut butter, chocolate spread i don't need to have any bread i just eat it with a spoon. i love Mince and Potatoes and Shepards Pie or moussaka, and Curry i love curry, not to mention my chish and fips... ahem i mean fish and chips.

Foods i don't like: eggs (as sanitary as it might be it still came out a chickens bum), i am not a big fan of chicken in general, i don't drink milk i have not done so since the age of three i can't even tell you why i don't, olives i am not sure why i just think they are something that i would question sticking in my mouth.

My favorite sayings, either my own or some famous persons:

My pen has eboli: an inside joke don't go thinking i am crazy, what the hell form your own oppinion.

Conventional babies????

if it is stupid but it works than it ain't stupid: some person wrote this but i find it so ingenious.

if you expect the unexpected then doesn't it make the unexpected expected: so true!

if barbie is so popular then why do you have to buy her friends: makes me laugh

evening news is when they begin with 'good evening' and then proceed to tell you why it isn't: i was fascinated by this one for weeks.

always remember that you are absolutely unique. just like everyone else.

i say bs to bs. - i am horrible liar and this is another inside joke.

i have a confession to make last night i giggled involuntarily- don't even ask but it was hysterically funny.

We are not talking- ...

What was that? - with that phrase you might just be able to guess my identity as i say it at least twenty times a day.

sh (it) whoah: again i am a random being but then again aren't we all?

I hate you, Moron... Moreoff or brat... brats father- the basis of some of the conversations me and father have don't worry now it is all in good fun... i think lol.

Few Tips:

Do not participate in a food fight or other act of insubordination or you will have a principal interogating you every time he looks your way: she looks around guiltily while trying to look innocent, damn he caught me. DON"T LOOK INTO THE LIGHT!!

don't crack a joke with your professor especially when it involves a fridge and his name: she shudders at the memory.

play frisbee or football in the posh room of your parents house: i can still hear the china crashing

get injured by trying to iron your knuckle crevices off becuase you believed them to be wrinkily, being drunk does not give you the excuse: the scars and memories not the highlight of those years.

Never insult someone when you don't know if they will take it seriously or not; she shudders

never toss a rugby ball in a shop it might just end up in some old lady's hair and she won't be to happy.

please . start talking at a young age or you will wind up an antisocial outkast like me, but then again if you would like to be an antisocial outkast like me than avoid that tip.

if you know that you can't cook do try to avoid the kitchen at all possible times (i have learnt that when you have been destined to eat from microwavable plates that you have no hope in culinary arts sadly my kitchen learnt this as well when it burnt to the ground it did so twice before i learnt this lesson so consider my warning before you turn on your toaster or however they cook things these days and remember to bring your fire putterouterer.)

If i ever start a band, we would be called: the Footclappers, how unique don't go stealing it has depth i am just not sharing it.

a few words of wisdom read and review, tell me your thoughts just don't treat me like your shrink anyways if you read this don't go thinking i am completley Bonkers i might be but thats really okay is it not? anyways thanks for reading the stories hope you liked them feel free to ask questions in a review, now i just sound like i am trying to promote my fic oh what the hell read my stories... please

Cheers

Petroleumjellydotone.