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| HarvestMoonRacoon |
Author has written 50 stories for Harvest Moon, Naruto, and D N Angel. THIS JUST IN: UPDATES IN MEH LIFE 1/2/08: Yay, a revamp! After a long absence, I'm finally back- with new stories! Has it BEEN long enough? Hope they're not too much of a disappointment. I wonder how large my fanbase still is? ... I'm sorry, everybody. I'm accepting Private Messages, now. Does that count for anything? I'm a ninja. You can't see me, OR my profile. Oh ho ho! Hello, my name is HMR, and I'm addicted to Cosplay. Theme Song: There's a Good Reason..., Panic! At The Disco Fandoms: Naruto, Death Note (hopefully) Heroes, and some original fiction. (My own novel, yay!) OTPs: Naruto, Lee/Saku; Death Note, L/Misa; Heroes, Hiro/AnythingFemaleThatMoves. Also flips for Gai/Kurenai, Lee/Female!Gaara, Lee/OC, and Sandcest. Genres: Angst, Horror, and Downright Weird Humor. Authoring Idol: Stephen King. Can you hear the monkey clapping?... Best Reviewers In The World: EnduranceInTribulation, bowserjr, MayanGirl6, Ameko-Shadowsong, Kiyari Makrono, naash, many more I've forgotten. You guys are the greatest. Gai-sensei should be paired well, and often; Anko, Shizune, Kurenai- just make sure gets his lovins. I hate yaoi and yuri. Violently. Has Justin Timberlake never caught on that he could just bore a hole in himself and let all the sap out? I'm a Christian, but in case you haven't noticed, my stories are not your Sunday-School fare, what with their healthy amount of swear words and at least one mention of there not being anybody 'up there' watching out for them. Writing about different theologies and recreating human emotion at it's most extreme is all a part of becoming a good writer, but feel free to revise your theories about us all being a bunch of pious zealots who cram Bibles down people's throats and are waiting around for a sip of Jim Jones' 'Magic Kool-Aid', or whatever. I eat Mary Sues for breakfast; They're so fake and hollow that they contain no calories. It's fantastic having fans, and even though I'm an anti-social, self-absorbed little wackmobile, I want you all to know that I really appreciate all the love I get here on FF.net. You guys rock beyond all reason. Dearly beloved, are you lis-teen-iiinngg? I can't remember a word that you were sayiinng... (Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh) Am I demented, or am I di-stuurbedd? Thisspacethat'sin-betweeninsaneandinsecure... COPYRIGHT INFORMATION FOR THE "30 WAYS" SERIES: Everyone likes this series, we've got 500 reviews (OMGYAY!!) for it, and it's being neglected by it's author. Anyway, I get about a thousand PMs a day, all reading virtually the same thing: "Can I use so-and-so Way Of Annoying for my fanfiction/fanart/twisted pleasure/to make my boyfriend leave me?", and frankly, I'm too busy to respond to them all. This section is here to tell you all: Knock yourselves out. Just knowing that my work is good enough to plagerize is enough to swell my pride like a bad case of anaphylaxis, but I appreciate it when people ask. So here's my official permission, on the grounds that you credit me for the original idea somewhere. I really appreciate that you checked my profile first before taking the idea. If you did, you're a cool person. -thumbs up- And I love reading the byproducts of my creation! If you want me to review your "30 Ways", just send me a PM with the link. I'm notorious for leaving ego-boosting reviews! Also, the first "30 Ways" story used a couple of ideas from a chain letter I got, and several months ago, I was contacted by the (irate) creator of the letter. I've forgotten her name since, and she didn't press charges, but I thought it was important to acknowledge this. Props to you, person. And withOUT you, is HOW I DISAPPEAR- You Meet The Weirdest People At Anime Conventions... "GASP, you like Inuyasha! You are LAME! We shall have to perform an anime exorcism on you! THE POWER OF NARUTO COMPELS YOU! THE POWER OF NARUTO COMPELS YOU!!" "SALMON!" "I know- Let's sit on the Cuban guy!" "Well, I was cosplaying Orochimaru, but the face cream gave me a rash, so now I'm Orochimaru In Anaphylactic Shock." "So easy, a Narutard could use it!" "You're the meanest Monkey D. Ruffy I've ever met! Go jump in a septic tank!!" "HARASS THE ITACHI! HURRAH, HURRAH!" "We found a pair of one-legged panties on the floor, and we're Questing to return them to Jiriaya. Have you seen one?" "LOOKIT, THIS MARSHMALLOW GUN WILL SHOOT TO THE TOP OF THE DEALER'S ROOM!!" "This is Lord Ne-Ne, the piggy king of all anime. Hug him, and his glorious necktie named Mr. Bubbles." At my second con a few months ago, I became pals with a Rock Lee cross-player. As we were cruising the dealer's room, the conversation of fanfiction came up, and she started talking about a really good one she'd read- about a girl named Rian and her 'imaginary friend', a cat by the name of 'Neko-Chan'. She went on about the story for five more minutes, and I couldn't speak until about than. She had read 'Neko-Chan'... This girl I'd never met before, from a completely different walk of life, had read my story, and was now talking about how much she loved it. I was so happy, I cried, right there among cosplayers and nerdy kids like me, the most glorious place I've ever been. That was one of the coolest experiences of my life, bar none. She didn't know I'd written it, who I was, or that I even wrote- She just loved the fic. She called it 'the best one ever' and 'had I read the sequel, "On The Way Down"?', and when I told her I'd written it, she glomped the life out of me. It thrills me just to think of it, now. I lost contact with her a while after that convention, but those things she said, and all the nice things you say when you just hit that purple button- They stay with me forever, and shape me into the writer I'll one day become. I've met some wonderful people, some true friends, and even some soul sisters on this site, and if you've ever even left a one-word review on one of my stories, I want you to know- It's meant the world to this one hopeful kid here. Thank you, every last one of you. Thank you so much. - HMR-Chan ... It seems kind of weird to mention this, but it just occured to me that ever since I created my original profile here for the very first time, I've had the words, "I'll be off then, now. Be sure to read my ficcys! -disappears in cloud of smoke-" at the bottom of this page. I was about to delete it as I revamped this, but... Ah, for ol' times sakes, I'll let it live. Reminds me of the good times way back when... " I'll be off then, now. Be sure to read my ficcys! -disappears in cloud of smoke- " Owari.
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1. Untitled reviewsMurderers should be locked away Lee loses it, and Gai's the one who took it from him. NonSlash Lee and Gai angst. HOORAH, I'M BACK!Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 850 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 1-3-08 - Lee R. & Gai M. - Complete2. My Deliverer reviewsWhere was His Deliverer when he needed him? [Lee centric, dark angst] Fun warnings include angst, child abuse, OOC Green Beasts, character death, and bad writing. ... Why must I always torture poor Lee in this way?Naruto - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,598 - Reviews: 13 - Published: 9-5-07 - Lee R. & Gai M. - Complete3. Happy Ending reviewsBetween the world we see and the things we fear, there are gates. When they are opened, nightmares become reality. [Oneshot, Leecentric, No Pairings] Rated for death, angst, and gore.Naruto - Rated: T - English - Horror/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,169 - Reviews: 11 - Published: 4-5-07 - Lee R. & Gai M. - Complete4. Love Is Never Ending reviewsIt took Rock Lee to bring Temari back to life. Or, at very least, remind her how to love. LeeTemari oneshot. Crack pairing and a whole lot of fluff. Songfic to Brad Paisley's 'Love Is Never Ending'.Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,514 - Reviews: 14 - Published: 1-23-07 - Temari & Lee R. - Complete5. 30 Ways To Agitate Chouji reviews30 Ways To Insure Sure Death At The Hands Of Akimichi Chouji.Naruto - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,275 - Reviews: 40 - Published: 1-14-07 - Chōji A.6. 30 Ways To ANnoy Shikamaru reviews30 Ways to drive Shika insane.Naruto - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 907 - Reviews: 44 - Published: 1-14-07 - Shikamaru N. - Complete7. 30 Ways To Make Inner Hinata Appear reviews30 ways to drive Hyuuga Hinata crazy.Naruto - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 657 - Reviews: 51 - Published: 1-14-07 - Hinata H. - Complete8. On The Way Down » reviews[Sequel to NekoChan] On the way down, Rian found Rock Lee, and it took something like true love to save her from herself. LeeOC, AnkoGai, NejiTen, a weird little ItachiOC in future chapters, and OCOC.Naruto - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 8 - Words: 63,874 - Reviews: 52 - Updated: 12-28-06 - Published: 9-20-06 - Lee R. & Itachi U.9. Comedy reviewsYou're the world's greatest comedian, Shizune. I just don't get your jokes, or why they have to hurt my heart so. GaiShizune, cheating girlfriends, and mild KakashiShizune.Naruto - Rated: T - English - Drama/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,394 - Reviews: 11 - Published: 12-17-06 - Gai M. & Shizune - Complete10. When Did You? reviewsWhen did I ever become enough for you? GaiShizune... Mindless [MINDLESS!] fluff. Don't read this.. for the good of your own sanity, don't read this...Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 981 - Reviews: 16 - Published: 12-13-06 - Gai M. & Shizune - Complete11. Male Bonding, In It's Weird Forms reviewsWhat goes on behind closed doors at Akatsuki.. should stay behind them. Jokingly implied ZetsuTobi, but no yaoi. LONG OVERDUE, I KNOW.Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Suspense - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,229 - Reviews: 29 - Published: 12-4-06 - Deidara & Sasori - Complete12. Crying Skies reviewsGaara loved it when it would rain even though it never really washed anything away. Drabblish Gaara Angst.Naruto - Rated: K - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,094 - Reviews: 17 - Published: 12-2-06 - Gaara - Complete13. 30 Ways To Annoy Temari reviewsYeah, I know. It's not as funny as it should be.Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 797 - Reviews: 44 - Published: 11-6-06 - Temari14. 30 Ways To Make Tenten Cram Kunai Down Your Throat reviewsUhoh. Team Gai's PMSing kunoichi is out for HMR's throat... Slight LeeTenNaruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,319 - Reviews: 46 - Published: 11-6-06 - Tenten & Lee R. - Complete15. 30 Ways To Agitate Tsunade reviews30 Ways Of Annoying guaranteed to make Tsunade want to murder you!Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 812 - Reviews: 41 - Published: 11-6-06 - Tsunade S. & Shizune - Complete16. Brothers reviewsShikamaru's gonna have to go through her Big Brothas first! TayuShika, For Mayangirl6. XDNaruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 4,201 - Reviews: 19 - Published: 10-29-06 - Tayuya - Complete17. Anything For Love reviewsSasuke would do anything for his reputation, wouldn't he? SasuTen, and a box of Tampax. XDNaruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,675 - Reviews: 26 - Published: 10-29-06 - Sasuke U. & Tenten - Complete18. It's The Way reviewsThey both just never know when to give up on broken relationships. KakaSaku angst, with an abusive Sasuke. Don't kill me, KhaziaChan...Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 3,140 - Reviews: 13 - Published: 10-17-06 - Kakashi H. & Sakura H. - Complete19. White reviews[Pink looked so beautiful against white. Just like her.] Some things haunt Rock Lee. Things like the color white.LeeSakura, vague character death.Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 779 - Reviews: 15 - Published: 10-9-06 - Lee R. & Sakura H. - Complete20. 30 Ways To Make Naruto Excessively Pissed reviewsThe kitsune child gets a taste of his own medicine, insomniac racoon style.Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 817 - Reviews: 53 - Published: 9-23-06 - Naruto U. & Sakura H. - Complete21. 30 Ways To Annoy Deidara reviewsThe slightlyover due continuation of the exciting and thrill filled 30 Ways series!Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 599 - Reviews: 45 - Published: 9-23-06 - Deidara - Complete22. 30 Ways To Annoy Uchiha Itachi reviewsGuaranteed annoyances that will make even the most stoic of smexy Naruto characters want to kill you in many nasty ways, if he already doesn't want to.Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 739 - Reviews: 64 - Published: 9-23-06 - Itachi U. & Kisame H. - Complete23. Little Tiny Pieces reviewsTeam Gai is broken in heart, mind, and body, and Tenten is dealing with the aftermath. Unfortunately, she's just as crazy as the rest of them. Oneshot. NejiTen, slight LeeTen, and if you're a pervert, GaiTen.Naruto - Rated: T - English - Angst/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,825 - Reviews: 27 - Published: 9-22-06 - Tenten & Lee R. - Complete24. NekoChan » reviewsOur imaginations have more power then we realize. LeeOC. Small mentions of LeexSakura, which abruptly end in Chapter 11.STORY COMPLETE.Naruto - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 15 - Words: 107,709 - Reviews: 194 - Updated: 9-15-06 - Published: 4-4-06 - Lee R. - Complete25. Smile, My Dead and Empty Soul reviews[Because everything's going dark and cold] Suicide poem. Small mention of christianity.Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Poetry/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 616 - Reviews: 30 - Published: 6-28-06 - Lee R. & Gai M. - Complete26. Lies We Believe reviewsA drabblish Gai.. drabble. Yes, another Green Beast angst. Sue me.Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 600 - Reviews: 15 - Published: 6-25-06 - Gai M. - Complete27. 30 Ways to Make Umino Iruka Mad reviewsA 30 Ways, Irukastyle! God, that was cheesy...Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 553 - Reviews: 93 - Published: 6-18-06 - Iruka U. & Deidara - Complete28. 30 Ways to Make Kiba Ratha Angry reviews30 Ways to annoy the dog ninja! Title varies.Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 643 - Reviews: 68 - Published: 6-18-06 - Kiba I. & Hana I. - Complete29. 30 Ways to Make Orochimaru Bite You reviewsYes, a 30 Ways on the Snake guy. Take pleasure.Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 617 - Reviews: 110 - Published: 6-18-06 - Orochimaru & Kabuto Y. - Complete30. F'n Crazy reviewsDeath is a cop out, and Rock Lee is just weak. He should never have been born. Just an angry kid on a rampage. Excessive swearing and rape implied. Seriously, don't read this. It's just anger management for me.Naruto - Rated: T - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 912 - Reviews: 18 - Published: 6-17-06 - Lee R. - Complete31. Eyes On Me reviewsIt's a pretty little eye. KakashiCentric, drabblish. This is what happens when you get a 13 year old high on Pepsi.Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 327 - Reviews: 12 - Published: 6-15-06 - Kakashi H. - Complete32. Field of Dreams reviewsNeji, Tenten, and a moment on time together. NejiTen oneshot. Fluff dusted with a bit of angst for flavor.Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 749 - Reviews: 36 - Published: 5-29-06 - Neji H. & Tenten - Complete33. Breathe reviews[Gai's dead, not gone. Breathe. Don't forget to breathe.] Lee's POV.What happens when there's nothing left to breathe? Character death, general HMR angstyness.Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 623 - Reviews: 18 - Published: 5-26-06 - Lee R. & Gai M. - Complete34. 1010 reviewsNeji was not in love. But Fate had a different plan.NejiTen pairing. Rated for fluffyness, obsessed Nejis and excessive use of the number 10. I'm going to hell for this one...Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,347 - Reviews: 110 - Published: 5-8-06 - Neji H. & Tenten - Complete35. 30 Ways to Drive Sakura Crazy reviewsTwo 30 Ways stories in one day! Oh, yeah!How to drive our Sasukeobsessed multipairer up the walls.Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 533 - Reviews: 207 - Published: 5-8-06 - Sakura H. & Sasuke U. - Complete36. 30 Ways to Annoy Gaara reviewsThe highly anticipated continuation of the 30 Ways series! Also called, 30 Things not to Do Around Gaara if you Value Your LifeNaruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 595 - Reviews: 213 - Published: 5-8-06 - Gaara & Kankuro - Complete37. Satoshi and the Spanish Inquisition reviewsSatoshi is visited by everyone's favorite Pope obsessors. Read this one only if you have seen Monty Python's Flying Circus before. Utter OOCness, completely plotless, and Satoshi reading strategically placed dictionaries.D N Angel - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 876 - Reviews: 5 - Published: 4-21-06 - Satoshi H. & Krad - Complete38. 30 Ways to Make Sasuke Punch You in the Teeth reviews30 Ways to annoy our Stoic Sharingan user.Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 635 - Reviews: 91 - Published: 4-19-06 - Sasuke U. - Complete39. 30 Ways to Make Hyuuga Neji Mad reviews30 SureFire ways to annoy our Byakugan user extrordinare. Requested by Garden of Everything.I thouroughly enjoyed writing this one, and hope you'll enjoy reading it. :Naruto - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 552 - Reviews: 74 - Published: 4-10-06 - Neji H.40. 50 Ways to Piss Off Freak Out Yakushi Kabuto reviews50 Ways to Piss off and frighten our favorite Sound Nin...Naruto - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 864 - Reviews: 122 - Published: 4-9-06 - Kabuto Y. & Tayuya - Complete41. Hyuuga Hijinx reviewsThat tape would be just FANTASTIC for black mail... No pairings.My mom thought it was hilarious...Naruto - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,174 - Reviews: 41 - Published: 4-8-06 - Neji H. & Tenten - Complete42. Constant reviewsTo him, the sky was blue, the grass was green, and Celia was his. Profound, angsty onsided MarlinCelia. Even people who hate the pairing may like this story.Harvest Moon - Rated: K - English - Angst/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 508 - Reviews: 6 - Published: 4-8-06 - Complete43. Reflections reviewsRock Lee hates ramen. But he loves Sakura. And would sacrifice anything for her.Onesided LeeSakuraNaruto - Rated: K+ - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,614 - Reviews: 23 - Published: 3-27-06 - Lee R. & Sakura H. - Complete44. There Is No Arizona reviewsShe was safe in his arms against everything. AnkoIruka, implied rape, and no, Iruka does not. Songfic to Jamie O'Neal's There Ain't No Arizona.Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Tragedy/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,366 - Reviews: 18 - Published: 3-25-06 - Iruka U. & Anko M. - Complete45. I reviewsI bid my blood to run. Lee's hidden masochist life.Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,251 - Reviews: 21 - Published: 3-17-06 - Lee R. - Complete46. Burning reviewsKabuto is burning. Like a broken tool, he is being dicarded by his master. Not for Kabuto fans.Naruto - Rated: K - English - Horror/Angst - Chapters: 1 - Words: 746 - Reviews: 11 - Published: 3-1-06 - Complete47. Iruka's Really Bad Day reviewsSome days stink... Some days suck... and some are just plain STUPID!No pairings.Naruto - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,997 - Reviews: 12 - Published: 3-1-06 - Complete48. My Little Horror reviewsSasuke's story through a highly violent, depressed author who has not seen more then 3 episodes of Naruto none with Sasuke in them and felt like writing a bloody fic. Must be the evil chibi tiger inside me. :Naruto - Rated: K+ - English - Angst/Horror - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,001 - Reviews: 7 - Published: 2-19-0649. Silence Is Not Always Golden reviewsEven now, I marvel at her. Her serene face curled into a smile, slender fingers knitted together, feet skipping like a child. Marlin regrets his silence as he watches his beloved pass him by. Again.Harvest Moon - Rated: K - English - Romance/Tragedy - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,479 - Reviews: 8 - Published: 2-18-06 - Complete50. Farmer Jack on the Millionare Show reviewsJust Farmer Jack... AND REGIS PHILBIN! And twotiming farmers! And angry Karens! And Cliff with buckets of water! Gee, what fun. My second ever fanfiction. Just a silly thing I wrote one day...Harvest Moon - Rated: K - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,783 - Reviews: 4 - Published: 2-8-06 - Complete
