Welcome one, welcome ALL- to the den of one of the laziest writers on the site!

I'm an adult female who is currently attending college- majoring in English. I have also lived with A.D.D since I was small. It never has slowed me down in my writing, so if you happen to have it and think it's an excuse for why you truly suck at writing, I should be allowed to strike you repeatedly. Also- I'm planning to get a Ph. D in English- how d'ya like that, you whining crybabies?- "i cant rite right cus i have atenton defecet disorder!-" suck. My. Shit.

One of the only things that I am certain of is that my entire life's bound to be some fucking celestial joke in one form or another- and that I can one day become a great story writer. Now, on with the rest of the show!

(If you want to add me to Windows Live Messenger, my E-mail is lavababe@hotmail.com. Please send me a message telling me that you are adding me; it's just... weird to get one from somebody I don't know...)

-(In No Particular Order At All) Turn-Ons: My college boy of a lover, Sick Humor, the paranormal, GOOD writing, proper grammar, books, movies, video games, writing, reviewing, strange facts, people with half of a brain and who aren't psycho religious or jerks, Romance, People with twisted senses of humor, forum chatting, learning new stuff, MUSIC!!, Weird food, silence, people willing to dole out concrit, reading a (VERY rare!!) in-character fanfic about male villains in which THEY AREN'T, FOR THE MOST PART, GAY (sorry, I find it sometimes hard to see that...) and in which he ACTUALLY GROWS AS A CHARACTER. Sweet guys usually aren't my dealie-o, but sometimes, sometimes... Hell freezes over. Ha ha.

Shows: The Venture brothers, Moral Orel, Furi Kuri, Kitchen Nightmares, The Suze Orman Show, Chowder, The Marvelous Misadventures of Flap-Jack, Project Runway, Top Chef, Animal Planet shows, the Travel channel, Cold Case Files, American Justice, Robot Chicken, Futurama, Family Guy, A Haunting, Paranormal State, Intervention, Lock-Up, To Catch A Predator, Law and Order, and Super Jail.

Movies: Too many horror movies to count (Hellraiser, The Shining, The Skeleton Key, The People Under The Stairs, A Nightmare On Elm Street, The Hills Have Eyes, The Wicker Man, Thir13en Ghosts, Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning, Last House On The Left, Friday The 13th), weird movies (Fight Club, Death Proof), movies that are meant to make you ponder things (American History X), comedies (Blazing Saddles, Space Balls, Wagons East!, The Producers, Big Trouble, Super Bad, Diary of a Mad Black Woman, Balls Of Fury, Without A Paddle, The Ringer, Juno, A League Of Their Own), Anime (Spirited Away, Howl's Moving Castle, My Neighbor Totoro, Kiki's Delivery Service...

Games: Too many to count, again- but I'll try... Persona 2 & 3, Odin Sphere, Dark Cloud 1 & 2, Legend Of Mana, The Sims 2, Okami, Disgaea: Hour Of Darkness, Monster Rancher 2, Final Fantasy: Tactics, Rogue Galaxy, Fable, The Elder Scrolls: Oblivion, Guitar Hero 2 & 3, Kingdom Hearts (somewhat), Soul Nomad and The World Eater, All and any Phoenix Wright games...

Music: Alice Cooper, Flogging Molly, Disturbed, Coldplay, The Red Hot Chili Peppers, The Moldy Peaches (somewhat), Electric Light Orchestra, anything classical while I'm writing, Disney Tunes (SHUT UP WITH YOUR EYES), The Beatles, The Monkees, Weezer, Panic! At The Disco, Meatloaf, Third Eye Blind, Matchbox 20, Sublime, The Fray, Black Sabbath, Linkin Park, Shinedown, Lynryd Skynrd, Michelle Branch, Queen, Live, Rage Against The Machine, Vertical Horizon, The Mamas and The Papas, Brooks and Dunn, Aerosmith, Liz Phair, the All-American Rejects, Audioslave, Run Kid Run, The Killers, Rage Against The Machine, Pat Benetar, Jimmy Eat World, Green Day, Anthrax, Ace of Base, Better Than Ezra, Sister Hazel, Wolfmother, Blues Traveler, Saliva, Soundgarden, Sara Evans...

Books: "Matilda" By Roald Dahl, The Hannibal Lecter Series by Thomas Harris, "The Complete Writings" by Edgar Allan Poe (a treasury of all of his stuff), "American Gothic Tales" by Joyce Carol Oates (a treasury of dark American tales), "The Funhouse" By Dean Koontz, The Harry Potter Series By J.K Rowling, "The Black Swan" by Mercedes Lackey, "When Will Jesus Bring The Porkchops?" & "Napalm And Silly Putty" by George Carlin, "Skeleton Crew", "Carrie", "Desperation", "Misery", "Cell", "Cujo", "Dolores Claibourne", "The Green Mile", "Lisey's Story" & "Pet Semetary" by Stephen King, "The Hellbound Heart" & "Books of Blood" by Clive Barker (a collection of his short stories), "The Elements of Style" by Strunk & White,

Comics/Graphics: "Jesus Christ Conquers The Martians" (misterkitty.org), "Neurotically Yours." (cafepress.org), "Cyanide & Happiness" (explosm.net) , "The Far Side." By Gary Larson, "Nausicaa Of The Valley Of the Wind" & "Howl's Moving Castle" by Hayao Miyazaki, "Johnny The Homicidal Maniac", & "Squee!" by Jhonen Vasquez, "Hellboy" By Mike Mignola, "The Last Temptation", "The Crusades", "Idiot Box", "Bitter Man" (Mad Magazine), "Get Fuzzy" (Daily Newspaper), "Will Write For Chocolate" (inkygirl.com)

(I Am SOOO Full Of Hate!)-I Hate: BAD writing, "Party Divas" & idiots who follow their sad, idiotic lives, chauvinists, other idiots on this site, slutty women who give men a reason to be chauvinists, people who know better but who want to be funny, so they write troll stories,

The Constant Stream Of Naruto, Inuyasha, and Harry Potter Psychotic Fangirls, People Who Harm Animals Cuz They Want To Feel Like REAL Tough Guys (A.K.A Animal Abuse), Censorship, Trolls, ANYTHING AT ALL to do with Stephanie Meyer and the books that SHALL NOT BE NAMED, stupid pieces of shit who never want to grow as writers on this site and only publish their OMIGAWD, SMEXXXYY FANTASIES with Professor Snape/Orlando Bloom/Draco Malfoy/Johnny Depp/Other Actor Who Doesn't Deserve Fangirl Fiction Rape stories, Sadism/Masochism/BDSM (EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW!), Scat/Twogirlonecup-type nightmarish shit, Movies so godawful that they make me cry, racists, People who post stories that are not ONLY full of grammatical holes but are GODAWFUL in every sense of the word, and... you get the picture.

(SPOILERS BELOW- BE CAREFUL WHERE YOU READ!)

Story Bulletin Board: For all of you drooling fanboys/fangirls who are waiting for me to just WRITE IT already.=-=-==-=--

When You Were Young: Completely revised and with new scenes added in- and the fat brutally ripped out! Mmmm mm! Damn it, I'm STARVING!

# Of Clicks- 2, 027

Fun Facts+

The idea for this came with the original idea of mine to have a necromancer who "collects" all of the ghosts and eventually makes them alive again. Think Harry Potter meets Pokemon- sadly. Thank god the original idea turned into this.

As for Horace? The only thing I can say for Horace's feelings to Molly while he was alive is that he most likely viewed Molly how a gruff male family member would view a child family member- like a little friend who knows little of the world and who obviously idolizes the person in question, even though he most likely viewed it as though he didn't deserve any kindness. Even from a girl-child with whom he probably only had the most innocent friendly feelings for.

In case you couldn't make the connection, the title for this story was based off of a song by "The Killers". I know- but at least it's not a songfic. And it makes an incredible match with the story I'm trying to tell here. (I would recommend listening to the song while reading, or at least look at the lyrics if you don't believe me).

My Thanks For This Completed Story Goes Out To: The Magical Pickle Fairy, SS-Romanticus, Tanzanite, lemonfreak69, StarsDarkness, Narias, HermioneandMarcus, frodocat, XxX.pInK.cOOkie.XxX, Ranekaera

Horace: What does an old sitcom star and Nick Talhoun's psychic friend have in common? Or, for that matter, just what in the hell is the deal with the normally docile giant of a dog? --=-=-=-=-====--Only on the next chapter of "Horace"!

Revised! Re-read if you are a fan. ...Please?

# Of Clicks- 1, 357

Fun Facts+

The continuation of "When You Were Young", this story is more of a general paranormal romance/drama than the partial memior of a neurotic lawyer- like the last installation.

The idea for what happens after chapter 5 nearly made me want to behead myself to find. to date, it was the hardest writer's block I've ever encountered.

My Thanks Go Out To: StarsDarkness, Narias, Ranekaera, TonicPeppermint

People Of The Scorpion: Dreaming a little dream is all good and well- but when the dream is of a faceless caricature of an old elementary school teacher who babbles on about fate enters a hapless heroine's unconcious thoughts, then could it be a clue that our protagonist's journey is only beginning- and was planned from the very start?... -- Only on the next chapter of "People Of The Scorpion"!

# Of Clicks- 4, 326

Fun Facts +

A story more of a woman's eventual rise over her husband's abusive nature & of the dark heritage and society she becomes embroiled in, this story wasn't meant to be a run-of-the-mill slasher fanfic- although many can draw allusions to my Layla/Daffodil to Tonic's Netta. Which I am actually happy to agree in that they are very alike in many ways- but also different in quite a few ways- especially their relationships.

In case you didn't catch it, re-writing the story that was so well-recieved for so long was my JulNoWiMo. I lost.

The "extra" mutants, i.e, Vulture, Whistle, Marvel- and, of course, Tu-Tone? Well, all I had to do was dig through my imagination to think of side-show attraction worthy folk- and just instill a little magic into them. Roach was different, however- his personality may be of my own creation (except for his protectiveness over his friends), but his state of muteness, his body (except for the antennae-hair, which was MINE), and even his name was borrowed from the original character from "The People Under The Stairs".

Some trivia for the always bored and for the classic horror movies fans out there- Lizard's God name (Mars) was, in fact, his character's original from Wes Craven's own version (and the first) Hills Have Eyes.Also, in case anybody enjoys some of Wes' other movies (and has picked up on my little piece of secreted away Easter egg) Roach is, in fact, the name of one of the teenagers that had been kept in a house of hells in The People Under The Stairs. I just thought that that character deserved a second go at the world, and where else would he fit but inside another universe originally created by Wes Craven himself?

My thanks for this story go out to: TonicPeppermint, frodocat, ThomasHewittIsNotMyLover, Cupy1000, XcrimsonxflamesX, Perpetual-Treason, jrock_lover, Shibari, undead_monkey_jack, DenPark, Bulleye-Fanatic, Cassie08, FireStarterSam, J-Ertl, Narias, TrashyReaction, Winterlove4, sasquachpacific, shay-piratess, Kit-Kate Bar, Sam Kallberg, Zephyrcat, princessangelita, NightXRiderX, Flights, -Secret Philosopher-, tatterdemalion, Lizard's bitch... thanks, guys. Wow. what a long list... O.o

Wretch: Done and done! I had this thing stashed away, fully completed for ages. Oh well- at least I gave it up eventually :)

# Of Clicks: 330

Fun Facts +

As noted, I had this thing completed but stored away for forever. Sorry!

As a prequel to the main story of Layla/Daffodil, I find this to be surprisingly sweet- beating and all. And yes, unlike my other story (Eye of The Beholder) this one takes place in the same universe as my main story.

For anybody who's dragging their feet about reading it- this story is Roach's story, and probably the closest thing you'll get to him having his own. I particularly liked the idea behind it of the mute main character getting his own voice.

My thanks for this story go out to: sodapop765, Cybil kitty

Eye of The Beholder: It's a oneshot, so... what you see is what you get.

# of Clicks: 124

Fun Facts +

Obviously, I had to ignore the hell out of two facts for this story- how Ruby gets seen by Doug, and how she died at the end. But, other than that, I believe it's passable.

This story was done in response of Rowena DeVandal's June 1000 Words Or Less Challenge. The concept behind the challenge was to take something away- I ended up giving my character something, instead of the other way around. But it passed!

I'm usually not into the 100 percent angst, but I found channeling this character was a surprisingly enjoyable experience.

The title's whole as supposed to be In The Eye of The Beholder: Jenny Doe but obviously a few things sabotaged that idea. First, I wanted to shorten the title (hilarious, given what else I'm known for, title-wise) and In The had a clunky feel to it. I hope the old cliche that I used as the title seems fitting.

My thanks for this story goes out to: Rowena DeVandal, and Tonic Peppermint (may not have helped in the traditional sense, but her lagging ways moved me to show her that if I could update, she damn well could, TOO), Ukitake-chan, and tatterdemalion.

Baby, What If?: Their second game is beginning- but the biggest thing to come is not of their triumph or fail, but what it is that a star player's sibling is hiding.-- Only on the next chapter of "Baby, What If?"

# Of Clicks- 1, 080

Fun Facts +

You think it's fun to be an anal retentive writer who believes that if you aren't 100 percent sure, you have to look something up , whether or not you've already looked up stuff for just one sentence in twenty different places? Then you would have had a ball to be me while I wrote this story! I know next to nothing about baseball- guess how often I have to go on the official AAGPBL official site- and Wikipedia?

I've been adding my own fun facts to the beginning of the new chapters. More the reason to read my stuff!

This story has been fully revised and updated- if you still love this story, re-read it immediatally! Throw that garbage bag out of the window, let the dog shit the carpet- just DON'T MISS OUT ON THE NEW AND REVISED VERSION!

My thanks for this story go out to: Sami-SDGForce, Tusk Of Thyme, princess-diva06, TonicPeppermint, 1000momentsfromU, Manda0610, herxlnc,

What Is It, Baby?: Mmm.. Mmmm! The refreshing scent of revision!

Clicks- 141

Fun Facts+

This story would have never become what it is today if I had found a story- any story- based off of "A League of Their Own" before I started this one. O.K, I've lately found out that one or two other stories have been written for A League, but this was the first completed one on this site. I urge other fans to get a new area of fandom for "A League of Their Own" so other people will begin writing fanfics for this movie! (Hopefully, some Dottie/Jimmy pairings... Cough, cough...)

All I had to do to think up the idea for this story was to ponder what would've happened if it had been Dottie who had tried to shake Jimmy Dugan awake instead of Mrs. Cuthbert. Viola, instant one-shot.

My thanks for this story go out to: Sami-SDGForce, princess_diva06, TonicPeppermint, Orochi Miho, herxlnc. Thanks, guys!

Future Developments: I'm just sticking to my old stories for now. I have to update, or everyone on this site will surely behead me...

If, on the off-chance you want to talk with me, send me a message, and I'll answer you back! Any questions for my stories, ideas, or constructive criticism are all appreciated, and I'll try to get back to you if you drop me a line!