One Writing Tip:

I'm not going to get on people about how they write or anything, because everyone has their own style and the way they want to do things. I just have this one suggestion. Don't write for your reviewers. What I mean is, when you write something, write it because YOU want to, and write it so that YOU'RE satisfied. Don't try to write the story so that your reviewers are satisfied. Hell, you're creating the story so it should be the way YOU like it. It's fine to to do requests and things, just don't become slaves to your reviewers.

"Thank your readers and the critics who praise you, and then ignore them. Write for the most intelligent, wittiest, wisest audience in the universe: Write to please yourself." ~Harlan Ellison

Favorites

Hobbies: Writing stories, doodling, hanging with friends, watching TV, surfing the internet, chatting on AIM, daydreaming (that's a really big one), reading

Favorite Anime and Manga: InuYasha, D N Angel, Naruto, Chobits, Ranma 1/2, Tokyo Mew Mew, Kamikaze Kaittou Jeanne, Fruits Basket, Fullmetal Alchemist, Bleach, Yotsuba, Death Note, Ouran High School Host Club

Favorite Books: Harry Potter, A Series of Unfortunate Events, Eragon, Children of the Lamp, The Outsiders, The Lord of the Rings, Cirque Du Freak, Moonlight Becomes You, Life Expectancy, Twilight, Seize the Night

Favorite TV Shows: Sponegebob Squarepants, Fairly Odd Parents, Jimmy Neutron, Avatar: The Last Airbender, The Fresh Prince of Belair, George Lopez, Dirty Jobs, Mythbusters, How Clean is Your House?, Wife Swap, What Not To Wear, and Whose Line is it Anyways?

Favorite Anime Characters:

Naruto: Sasuke, Kakashi, Naruto, Suigetsu, Sakura, Tenten, Jiraiya, Kabuto (sometimes), and Itachi (later on in the manga)

Inuyasha: Inuyasha, Kagome, Sango, Jakotsu, Sesshomaru, and Miroku

D N Angel: Daisuke, Dark, Riku, and Satoshi

Death Note: Ryuuku, Matsuda, Mello, Near, and L

Bleach: Kisuke, Ichigo, Rukia, Chad, and Renji

FullMetal Alchemist: Ed, Al, Roy, Riza, and Armstrong

Favorite Pairings:

Naruto: Sasuke/Sakura, Naruto/Hinata, Sasuke/Hinata, Kiba/Hinata, Neji/Tenten, Shikamaru/Ino, Shikamaru/Temari, Asuma/Kurenai, Jiraiya/Tsunade, Kabuto/Shizune, Kabuto/Sasuke, Gaara/Sasuke, Kisame/Sasuke, Suigetsu/Sasuke, and I like Itachi/Sasuke and Orochimaru/Sasuke in some cases

Inuyasha: Inuyasha/Kagome, Miroku/Sango, Sesshomaru/Kagura, Shippou/Rin, Souta/Rin, Kohaku/Rin

D N Angel: Daisuke/Riku, Dark/Risa, Satoshi/Risa

FullMetal Alchemist: Ed/Winry, Roy/Riza, Al/Martel, Roy/Ed

Death Note: L/Light, Mogi/Misa

Bleach: Ichigo/Rukia, Uryuu/Orihime, Zenpachi/Ichigo, Ichigo/Orihime

Disliked Pairings:

Naruto: Sasuke/Naruto, Itachi/Sakura, Sakura/Akatsuki, Naruto/Sakura, Ino/Sakura, Orochimaru/Sakura, Itachi/Naruto

Inuyasha: Sesshomaru/Kagome, Inuyasha/Miroku, Naraku/Kagome, Sango/Kagome

D N Angel: Krad/Dark, Krad/Daisuke, Dark/Daisuke

Bleach: Byakuya/Renji

Quotes:

"If you're taught to love everyone...To love your enemies, then what value does that place on love?" ~Marilyn Manson

"You are a loser. You will always be a loser because thats what a loser is... a loser. There is nothing else a loser can be but a loser. The fact that you are a loser has already been decided...and when something has been decided it can not be changed because it is decided! It has been decided by none other than me!" ~Neji fanart

"You're not just burnt, you're fried!" ~Rachel

"Your Aunt Tilly!" ~Rachel (her counter to "your mom!")

"I'm not intellectual enough to know what that means!" ~Alex

"The only thing that saves Sasuke from certain molestation at the hands of a freak named Karin is certain molestation at the hands of a freak named Suigetsu." ~me

"If homosexuality is a disease, we should all call in queer to work. 'Hello, can't come to work today. Still queer." ~Unknown

"Those in the ninja world who break the rules and regulations are called filth, but those who don't care about their companions... are even lower than filth." ~Uchiha Obito

"The only way to make your PC go faster is to throw it out a window." ~Robert Paul

"Is there a blonde stupid-faced guy about my age and a large white-haired old man staying here?!"~Sasuke

“A good friend will comfort you when he rejects you. But a best friend will go up to him and say “It's because you're gay isn't it?”"~?

“All the good ones are either gay, married, or fictional characters in books or movies.” ~?

"WHERE'S THE HEAT!?"~Taylor (at the football game, she got some hot chocolate that wasn't even hot, it was lukewarm lol)

"WHERE'S THE MEAT!?"~me (at my school's football game, I got these nachos that were just chips and cheese but no meat xD)

(a lot more that I like but don't feel like typing up at the moment)

Upcoming Stories:

Title: Ninjas of the Caribbean

Summary: Team 7 goes on a cruise to the Carribeans. Will they have the time of their life, or drive each other crazy? Probably both. No pairings!

Genre: Comedy, Friendship

Rating: T

Random Things To Make My Profile A Little Interesting and Extremely Long:

If you fail at thinking up original characters and storylines, so you write fanfictions because you can borrow the characters and the settings, copy and paste this into your profile and add your name: Kaira-chan15

If people who have sticks stuck so far up their asses that they they can never pull them out again tick you off to no end, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever rinsed strawberries off, laid them out on paper towels to dry, then when you took the strawberries off you grabbed the red stained paper towels and ran around the house with them screaming "I killed a man!!" copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that it's stupid that Trix cereal was changed so that the pieces aren't shaped like fruit anymore but are shaped like plain circles, copy and paste this into your profile.

SASUKE RULES CLUB: IF you think Sasuke Uchiha rules. Copy and paste this into your profile and add your name to the list.: sasukerules.org, xkawaiichix, Kaira-chan15

If you have ever run into a door, copy this into your profile.

If you have ever had a mad laughing fit for absolutely no reason, copy and paste this into your profile

If you know someone who should be run over by a bus, copy this to your profile

If you have ever looked at something that wasn't there when somebody said "Look its _", copy onto profile

If you have ever run into a tree, copy this to your profile!

If you have ever tripped over air, copy this into your profile.

If someone has ever said something to you that had nothing to do with your current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile.If you have ever said something that had nothing to do with your current conversation, copy and paste this into your profile!

If you and/or your best friend is insane, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you are aware that so many people nowadays pretend to be someone they're not, copy this on your profile.

If you think those kids should just give the Rabbit his cereal put this in your profile!

If you have ever been so obsessed with something that now everyone is scared of you because of its effects copy this into your profile

If you have ever changed your password on something and forgotten it, copy and paste this into your profile.

98 percent of teenagers do or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2 percent who hasn't, copy & paste this in your profile.

If you have EVER been so obsessed with a song you actually A.) dream about it, B.) sing it in school no mattter who's listening OR C.) know the lyrics by heart and sing it no matter how off key you are, copy this in your profile.

If your mother/father has ever called you THEIR sister/brother's name(your Aunt/Uncle), copy this in your profile

If you believe PREPS TRAVEL IN PACKS, copy this into your profile.(from Midnight Pearls aka Mermaid-Halfbreed)

If you have ever mistaken a stick for a snake, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever laughed so hard tears streamed down your face, you banged your repeatedly on a table, and recieved weird looks from everyone in the immediate vincinity, copy and paste this in your profile. EcoliandDahChihuahua, Michi-Baka, Neji's fangirl, catilena1890, Kaira-chan15

If there are times when you wanna annoy people just for the heck of it, copy this into your profile.

If you hate those obnoxious snobby people, PLEASE copy this into your profile.

Naruto for Rokudaime Hokage! If you also want Naruto to succeed Tsunade as the next Hokage, then copy and paste this to your profile page, and add your name to the list! Help Naruto achieve his dream!: KinKitsune01, Takaiteishu Naruto, TheOtaku Akatsuki, Kaira-chan15

If you think that Sasuke from Naruto completly has to have the nick-name 'Chicken Butt Hair Dude', copy this to your profile while laughing your ass off.

If you are against fur coats or killing animals just to look good, copy this into your profile and add your name: Snowfirexoxo, FlameRisingSucks101, Sparrowflight, Sapphirepaw, hxcb, SilverwingedShadow, Meepisms, FerretMan (ANIMALS RULE), death-on-arrival, Kaira-chan15

92 percent of teenagers would die if Abercrombie and Fitch told them it wasn't cool to breathe. Put this in your profile if you would be part of the 8 percent laughing your arse off.

If you don't watch Laguna Beach or the O.C. or The Hills religiously, never have, never will, and are proud of it, copy and paste this into your profile

Even when you can’t see him GOD is there! If you believe in GOD put this in your profile.

Weird is good, strange is bad, and odd is when you don't know what to call someone. Weird is the same as different which is the same as unique, so weird is good. If you are weird and proud of it copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever asked a really stupid, obvious question, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you think that being unique is cooler than being cool, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have a true friend, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever pretended to be a spy with your headphones/earpiece just to freak people out, copy and paste this onto your profile. :D

If you write/like fluff, copy and paste this onto your profile.

~pass the ribbon around if you know someone that has survived, DIED, or is living with cancer.

If you've been on the computer for hours on end, reading numerous fanfictions, copy this onto your profile, and add your name to this list: Danyan, Avatarwolf, Shifter-youkai, Vert9411, pinkcherryblossom225CherryBlossoms016, SakuraUchiha14,Sakura-Cherry-Blossom-Chan, Moonlight Music Mistress,ChristinaAngel,cocogirl198, Kaira-chan15

If you've ever copied and pasted something onto your profile, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you ever read past two in the morning, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you love rain, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you would LOVE to know how Naruto's going to end, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you've ever walked into a door (or lampost) copy this onto your profile.I've done both several times.

If you have a ridiculously long profile, copy and paste this onto your profile to make it longer.

If you are random and don't care, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you enjoy copying and pasting these copy and paste thingys, copy and paste this onto your profile.

If you've ever walked into a doorway that you could've clearly dodged, you just weren't paying close enough attention, copy and paste this on your profile.

If you read people's profiles looking for things to copy and paste into your profile, copy and paste this into your profile

If you have ever walked into a room then forgot what you were doing, then started walking away then remebered, copy this into your profile.

If you probably need a life but have no intentions of getting one, copy this into your profile page.

There's nothing wrong with arguing with yourself. It's when you argue with yourself and LOSE when it's weird. If you agree, copy this and put it in your profile.

If you think that Neji likes Tenten as more than a teammate or close friend, copy and paste this to your profile and add your name here: Moonlight Music Mistress,ChristinaAngel,cocogirl198, Kaira-chan15

If you will add anyone to your favorite authors list who writes stories with your favorite couple, copy and paste this to your profile.

If you want to smack the living daylights out of Sasuke for abandoning Sakura, copy and paste this to your profile

If you love Naruto's couples, whatever they may be, as much as the show itself, copy and paste this to your profile and add your name here: Moonlight Music Mistress,ChristinaAngel,cocogirl198, Kaira-chan15

If you think that, although Tenten doesn't show up in the anime/manga too much, she deserves more appreciation and that she kicks butt, copy and paste this to your profile and add your name here: Moonlight Music Mistress,ChristinaAngel,cocogirl198, Kaira-chan15

If you love and want to marry any Naruto character on the whole show, copy and paste this to your profile and add your name here: Moonlight Music Mistress,ChristinaAngel,cocogirl198, Kaira-chan15

╔═╦╦══╦══╦╗╔╦══╦══╗╔╗
║║║║╔╗║╔╗║║║╠╗╔╣╔╗║║║Put this on your
║║║║╚╝║╚╝╣║║║║║║║║║╚╝page if you love
║║║║╔╗║╔╗║╚╝║║║║╚╝║╔╗Naruto!
╚╩═╩╝╚╩╝╚╩══╝╚╝╚══╝╚╝

If you are a fan of SasuSaku fan then copy and paste this in your profile

If you have ever fallen off a chair backwards, copy and paste this in your profile.

If you are obsessed with fanfiction copy this into your profile.

If you wish there was a filler Naruto episode in either Shippuden or the first series where they all go to high school, on vacation, or audition for a play, copy and paste this to your profile and add your name here: Moonlight Music Mistress, Xanie, Heza-chan X3, ToraHimeSama, Kaira-chan15

FANFICTION: MY ANTI-DRUG. because, who has time for drugs if you're reading and plotting and writing and checking reviews? If this is true for you, copy and paste this to your profile

If your friends are WEIRD (But not as weird as you) put this on your profile.

If you have a mad fascination with the Japanese culture, copy and past this into your profile

If you like singing songs at random points in the day, copy this into your profile.

If you think that Sasuke's personality in episode 101 was pure gold, copy and paste this to your profile and add your name here: Moonlight Music Mistress, Rokuko Kaminari Blaze, Kaira-chan15

If you've ever wondered what you are like in another dimension, paste this onto your account.

The electric chair was invented by a dentist. If you are scared now more than ever of dentists by learning this fact, put this on your profile.

If you think fighting is fun, but war is pointless, copy this into your profile.

If you don't have a problem with homosexuality, copy this into your profile.

If your one of those people who can literally stay on the computer for hours on in if only you weren't forced to get off, then copy and paste this on your profile.

If you've ever just wanted to SLAP someone, copy and paste this into your profile

Normal 0 MicrosoftInternetExplorer4

If you think the Coa-coa Puff Turkey Bird thing should go to rehab, copy this into your profile.

A large percent of writers don't know the difference between "your" and "you're". If you're one of the ones who does know and wants to slug them, copy and paste this into your profile.

If you have embarrassing memories that make you want to smack yourself/ someone else, copy this into your profile.

Number your twelve favorite Naruto characters (in no particular order) and answer the following questions:

1. Sasuke

2. Naruto

3. Sakura

4. Kakashi

5. Suigetsu

6. Jiraiya

7. Orochimaru

8. Kabuto

9. Tenten

10. Tsunade

11. Rock Lee

12. Gaara

1. Have you ever read a Six/Eleven fan-fic before?
No but now I desperately want to! xDDD ROFL MY MIND WOULD BE SCARRED FOREVER, BUT IT WOULD FEEL SO RIGHT.

2. Do you think Four is hot? How hot?
Yes, extremely hot. And cool. He’d probably be even hotter and cooler if he took off that mask though lol.

3. What would happen if Twelve got Eight pregnant?
….. –breaks out into barely contained chuckles- KABUTO AS AN UKE?! ROFLLLL

4. Do you recall any fan-fics about Nine?
Yep. I’ve written some.

5. Would Two and Six make a good couple?
Mmh…it’s a reasonable pairing I guess, but I don’t like it. I think they’re cuter with a father/son relationship.

6. Five/Nine or Five/Ten?
….That’s a hard choice. I think Suigetsu would actually look pretty cute with Tenten, but for some reason I could picture him with Tsunade too. Tenten is closer to his age though.

7. What would happen if Seven walked in on Two and Twelve having sex?
If Sasuke were in it, he’d most definitely join in. I mean, this is Orochimaru we’re talking about lol. But since Sasuke isn’t, he might just kill both Naruto and Gaara….or join in anyways xD

8. Make up a summary for a Three/Ten fanfic.
At first she pretended the love she held for the woman was only the love a girl holds for her mother…but who was she fooling?

(….lol I feel like such a creeper now, just thinking of that pairing xD)

9. Is there any such thing as One/Eight fluff?
Mmhmm…I’ve read it before, and it’s adorable! _

10. Suggest a title for a Seven/Twelve Hurt/Comfort fic.
Orochimaru and Gaara...wow. xD. –rolls up sleeves- Let’s see what I can work with.

How about ‘Sandcastles’, or ‘Rebuilding the Sandcastle’…I know it sucks, shut up. You try to think of one with this pairing!! lol

11. What kind of plot would you use if you wanted Four to de-flower One?
Well, Sasuke’s house would be totally obliterated in the struggle with Orochimaru during the Chuunin Exams, so Sasuke would live with Kakashi for a short time. Then, Kakashi would molest him on a daily basis and would use his porno novel in someway to get into Sasuke’s pants….I mean honestly; I think Kakashi would be a simple man when it comes to trying to sex-up his student. xDDD

12. Does anyone on your friends list read Three het?
I don’t know lol. From off the top of my head, I don’t think so.

13. Does anyone on your friends list write or draw Eleven?
Ugh I don’t knowwwwwwwwww.

14. Would anyone on your friends list write Two/Four/Five?
Naruto/Kakashi/Suigetsu threesome? I highly doubt it xD But I’m tempted to write it just to creep people out.

15. What might Ten scream at a moment of great passion?
“I NEED A DRINKKKKKKKK!”

16. If you wrote a song-fic about Eight, what song would you choose?
Everybody’s Fool - Evanescence

17. If you wrote a One/Six/Twelve fic, what would the warning be?
Warning – Please do not take this seriously. Jiraiya would never sex-up anything that lacked boobs (and no, man-boobs do not count), and Gaara would not rape Sasuke with someone else watching. Sasuke would be too busy training to take part in a time-absorbing activity such as a threesome.

18. What might be a good pick-up line for Ten to use on Two?
“When I kissed you on the forehead after you saved me, I was trying to get your lips…Help correct my aim?”

(Yeah I suck at pick-up lines xD)

19. How might Eleven describe a relationship between Two and Eight?
“IT’S A VIGOROUS AND COURAGEOUS BOND OF YOUTHFULNESS AND ADULTERY….GAI SENSEI, WHAT IS ADULTERY?”

20. How emo is Seven?
I wouldn’t describe him as emo…pedophile would fit better. Or Michael Jackson of the Narutard world. That would fit perfectly also.

THE NARUTARD SURVEY: NARUTARDS UNITE!

1. Who is your favourite Naruto character(s)? Sasuke, Kakashi, Sakura, Naruto, Suigetsu, Sakura, Tenten, Jiraiya, Kabuto, Itachi (Yesh, I have a lot lol)

2. What is your favourite pairing(s)? SasuSaku, NaruHina, NejiTen, ShikaIno, AsumaKurenai, JiraiyaTsunade, SuiSasu, OroSasu

3. Are you a Naruto yaoi or hentai fan? ...I'm not really a fan of either, but I guess I would have to say that I like both

4. Ever cosplayed Naruto characters? If so, who, where and how many times? Hale yesh! Gai once at a small anime gathering at a store in a mall, and then Sango once for Halloween. Yeah, I'm kool

5. List your collection of Naruto junk and merchandise, if any: Holy crap. Umm ok. A Naruto poster, a Sasuke wallscrool, books 1-24, 12 anime seasons plus 2 movies, a Kakashi plushie, a Sasuke plushie, action figures, cards...I'll stop now xD

6. Have you ever felt that you were destined to be with a Naruto character? -snorts out milk- No. I mean sure, I've been obsessed with some of them and thought they were hot, but even I know that it's not gonna happen. Real life person + Cartoon character = Disturbia to the max

7. NaruHina or KibaHina? NaruHina

8. SasuSaku or SasuNaru? SasukSaku. SasuNaru makes me want to punch something.

9. Which team is your favourite? Team Kakashi, all the way

10. Do you support the Obito theory (Tobi=Obito)? Psh. Hale no. That's already been disproven.

11. Do you support the 'Yondaime is Naruto's father' theory? Yeah. That's already been proven.

12. Your favourite Akatsuki member? Probably Kisame

13. Are you Pro-Sasuke or Anti-Sasuke? Pro-Sasuke, all the way!

14. Have you seen all Naruto episodes so far (including Shippuden and fillers)? Almost all of it. There's some Shippuden I haven't seen though.

15. Have you read all the chapters so far? Most of them, but not all of them.

16. Do you believe Naruto has ADD? No...although I do think he's hyperactive lol

17. Sub or dub? Sub!! I HATE the dub with a passion. They all sound queer, in my opinion at least.

18. Pro-Sakura or Anti-Sakura? Pro-Sakura. She's made of epic win.

19. Tobi = Annoying or funny? Funny as hell at first, but when I found out he was Madara, he became annoying

20. Do you even know who Tobi is? Duh. Yes.

21. Gai = Sexy beast or Ugly nerd? Sexy beast dude, I mean come on xDDD

22. Which character would be the best cross dresser? Haku. Or Orochimaru. But Haku first.

23. Rock Lee = Weird or Awesome? Awesome to the extent of epic proportions.

24. Which character would be best OOC? Lol any of them really, but Orochimaru, Itachi, Sasuke, or Naruto would be the best I think

25. Do you like Naruto fanfics? I wouldn't be here if I didn't, would I now? lol

26. Do you write Naruto fanfics? Yesh, it's like my life lawl

27. Do you like lemons? ...It depends lol

28. Do your parents know about the Naruto characters? Yeah dude, I make them watch it with me xD

29. Have you watched the Naruto Abridged Series? Some of it, not all of it yet. Funny as hell though

30. Have you seen The Naruto Ultimate Fanflashes? Omg yesh. I love em to death!

31. Have you ever gotten someone else hooked on Naruto? Yup, one of my best friends. Although she's more hooked on Sasuke than the actual show lol

32. Have you ever been drawing Naruto in school and has someone recognized it? No dude, I suck a drawing. They wouldn't be able to recognize it even if I did xD

33. Have you ever been in class drawing Naruto and the teacher came up to you and said 'WTF is this?'? Refer to #32

34. Has Naruto affected your school life and grades? Not grades, but school life sadly yes. I sometimes choose to daydream about epic ninjas than to pay attention in class hehe xD

35. Are you broke thanks to Naruto? Yes xD

36. Do you want to read Icha Icha Paradise? No, but I want to shatter someone else's innocence with it!

37. Do you support the 'Yondaime is the Akatsuki Leader' theory? Psh. No. Yet again, that's been disproven.

38. Do you draw Naruto fan art? If so, count how many there are in your gallery? Nope, I fail at fanart, unfortunately

39. Is Sasuke still sexy in his second stage of the cursed seal? Hale. No.

40. Do you have a Naruto OC? ...In my mind xD

41. Looking back at some of your answers, do you think Naruto has taken over your life? Dude, that thing took my life over long ago, and I'm never getting the reigns back!

Random Stuff:

Girls
are like
apples on trees.
The best ones are
at the top of the tree. The
boys don't want to reach
for the good ones because they
are afraid of falling and getting hurt.
Instead, they just get the rotten apples
from the ground that aren't as good,
but easy. So the apples at the top think
something is wrong with them, when in
reality, they're amazing. They just
have to wait for the right boy to
come along, one who's
brave enough to
climb all
the way
to the top
of the tree.

6 reasons not to mess with children:

Reason 1:

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.

The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.

The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.

Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.

The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".

The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"

The little girl replied, "Then you ask him ".

Reason 2:

A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work.

As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.

The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."

The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."

Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, "They will in a minute."

Reason 3:

A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds

After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"

Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill."

Reason 4:

The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.

"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.'

A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, she's dead."

Reason 5:

A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood.

Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face."

"Yes," the class said.

"Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"

A little fellow shouted, "Cause your feet ain't empty."

Reason 6:

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch.

At the head of the table was a large pile of apples.

The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God is watching."

Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.

A child had written a note, "Take all you want. God is watching the apples."

Sakura: Do I ever cross your mind?
Sasuke: No
Sakura: Do you like me?
Sasuke: Not really
Sakura: Do you want me?
Sasuke: No
Sakura: Would you cry if I left?
Sasuke: No
Sakura: Would you live for me?
Sasuke: No
Sakura: Would you do anything for me?
Sasuke: No
Sakura: Choose--me or your life?
Sasuke: My life
Sakura runs away in shock and pain and Sasuke runs after her and says...
The reason you never cross my mind is because you're always on my mind.
The reason why I don't like you is because I love you.
The reason I don't want you is because I need you.
The reason I wouldn't cry if you left is because I would die if you left.
The reason I wouldn't live for you is because I would die for you.
The reason why I'm not willing to do anything for you is because I would do everything for you.
The reason I chose my life is because you ARE my life.

LEARN CHINESE IN 5 MINUTES
Say the words out loud.
1) That's not right... ...Sum Ting Wong
2) Are you harboring a fugitive? ...Hu Yu Hai Ding
3) See me ASAP... ...Kum Hia Nao
4) Stupid Man... ... Dum Fuk
5) Small Horse... ...Tai Ni Po Ni
6) Did you go to the Beach?...Wai Yu So Tan
7) I bumped into a coffee table...Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin Ni
8) I think you need a face lift...Chin Tu Fat
9) It's very dark in here...Wao So Dim
10) I thought you were on a diet...Wai Yu Mun Ching
11) This is a tow away zone...,No Pah King
12) Our meeting is next week...Wai Yu Kum Nao
13) Staying out of sight...Le i Ying Lo
14) He's cleaning his automobile...Wa Shing Ka
15) Your body odor is offensive...Yu Stin Ki Pu
16) Great... ...Fa Kin Su Pah

Wars is like duct tape, it has a dark side, a light side, and it holds the universe together!

-Fu, Bu and Chu immigrated to the USA from China. They decided to become American citizens, and "Americanize" their names.
Bu, called himself "Buck"
Chu called himself "Chuck"
Fu decided to return to China.

A black man walks into a cafe one early morning and noticed that he was the only black man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him.
The white man said, "Coloured people are not allowed here."
The black man turned around and stood up. He then said:
"When I was born I was black,"
"When I grew up I was black,"
"When I'm sick I'm black,"
"When I go in the sun I'm black,"
"When I'm cold I'm black,"
"When I die I'll be black."
"But you sir..."
"When you're born you're pink,"
"When you grow up you're white,"
"When you're sick, you're green,"
"When you go in the sun you turn red,"
"When you're cold you turn blue,"
"And when you die you turn purple."
"And yet you have the nerve to call me coloured"
The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
Copy this onto your site and help stop racism!

Heaven & Hell--the real difference:

A man spoke with the Lord about heaven & hell. The Lord said the the man, "Come, I will show you hell." They entered a room where a group of people sat around a huge pot of stew. Everyone was famished, desperate, starving. Each held a spoon that reached the pot, but each spoon had a handle so much longer than their own arm that it could not be used to get the stew into their own mouths. The suffering was terrible.

"Come, now I will show you heaven," the Lord said. They entered another room, identical to the first--same pot of stew, same group of people, same long-handled spoons. But there everyone was happy & well-nourished.

"I don't understand," said the man. "Why are they happy here when they were miserable in the other room yet everything is the same?"

The Lord smiled. "Ah, it is simple," He said. "Here they have learned to feed each other."

ONLY IN AMERICA...

...can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance

...are there handicap parking spaces in front of ice-skating rinks

...sick people go to the back of Walgreens to get their medicine, while healthy people get their cigarettes at the front

...people buy hotdogs in packs of 10 and hotdog buns in packs of 8

...the banks leave both vaults open and then chain the pens to the counter

...people order a double cheese burger, large fries, and a diet coke

...people leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveways and keep their junk in garages

...people use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so they won't miss the calls from someone they don't want to talk to in the first place

10 BEST THINGS ABOUT BEING A GIRL

10. We can wear guy clothes, but if they wear ours they get funny looks

9. At least one girl always survives in horror movies

8. We can put cotton between our toes and paint our nails without feeling the least bit silly

7. Our magazines have horiscopes

6. Girls with guy first names like Taylor sound cool, but it doesn't work the other way around

5. Our friends don't say "hi" by punching us in the arm

4. Yes PMS sucks, but at least we have an excuse to lay around eating chocolate once a month

3. Make-up covers any imperfections we may have

2. If we flirt with a cop, we can get out of a speeding ticket

1. Girl Talk... you know, the way we all just understand each other without having to explain a thing

You're a 90's kid if:

You can finish this "Ice ice _ "--ummm still not cool, even then.

You remember watching:
-Doug
-Ren & Stimpy
-Pinky and the Brain
-AAAAAAAH Real Monsters!
-Rockos modern Life.

You've ever ended a sentence with the word "PSYCHE!"

You just cant resist finishing this . . . "Iiiiiiin west philidelphia born and raised . . ."

You remember:
-TGIF
-Step by Step
-Family Matters
-Dinosaurs
-Boy Meets World.

You remember when it was actually worth getting up early on a Saturday to watch cartoons.

You got super excited when it was Oregon Trail day in computer class at school.

You remember reading "Goosebumps"

You took plastic cartoon lunch boxes to school.

You said "NOT" after (almost) every sentence . . . not

when everyhting was settled by:
-rock paper scissors or
-bubble gum bubble gum in a dish or
-daddy had a donkey inky binky bonky.

when cops and robbers was a daily activity.

when we played Hide and go seek until our legs grew numb.

You used to listen to the radio all day long just to record your FAVORITE song of ALL time.

"Where in the World is Carmen San Diego?" was both a game and a TV game show.

Captain Planet. He's a Hero.

You knew that Kimberly, the pink ranger, and Tommy, the green ranger, were meant to be together.

You remember when Super Nintendos and Sega Genisis became popular.

You remember watching Home Alone 1, 2 , and 3 . . . and tried to pull the pranks on "intruders"

You remember watching:
-The Magic School Bus
-Wishbone
-Reading Rainbow on PBS.

You remember when Yo-Yos were cool.

You remember those Where's Waldo books.

You remember eating Warheads.

You remember watching:
-the 1st Batman
-Aladdin
-Ninja Turtles
-3 Ninjas movies.

You remember Ring Pops.

You remember drinking Surge, and Tang.

If you remember when every thing was "da BOMB!"

When they made the new lunchables so that you could make pizza AND tacos.

You remember boom boxes vs. cd players.

Making those little paper fortune cookie things, and then predicting your life with them.

You played and/or collected "Pogs" :)

one word. . . Furbies.

You haven't always had a computer, and it was cool to have the internet.

And Windows 95 was the best.

You watched the original cartoons of Rugrats, Power Rangers, and Ninja Turtles.

Michael Jordan was a king.

YIKES pencils and erasers were the stuff!

You remember when the new Beanie Babies and Talking Elmo were always sold out

You collected those Beanie Babies.

Carebears

Gak was the coolest stuff invented.

The old dollar bills.

Silver dollars, which were cool to have.

You remember a time before the WB.

You collected all the Troll dolls

If you even know what an original walkman is.

You remember wanting to sit on the orange Nickelodeon couch.

You've gotten creeped out by "Are You Afraid of the Dark?"

You know the Macarena by heart.

"Talk to the hand" . . . enough said

You always said, "Then why don't you marry it!"

You went to McDonald's to play in the playplace.

You remember playing on merry go rounds at the playground.

Before the MySpace frenzy . . .

Before the Internet & text messaging . . .

Before Sidekicks & iPods . . .

Before MIKE JONES . . .

Before PlayStation2 or X-BOX . . .

You know you live in the year 2000 + when...

1.) You accidently enter your password on a microwave.

2.) You haven't played solitare with real cards for years.

3.) The reason for not staying in touch with your friends is b/c they don't have a screen-name or myspace.

4.) You'd rather look all over the house for the remote instead of just pushing the buttons on the T.V.

6.) Your boss doesn't even have the ability to do your job.

7.) As you read this list you keep nodding and smiling.

8.) As you read this list you think about sending it to all of your friends.

9.) And you were too busy to notice #5.

10.) You scrolled back up to see if there was a #5.

11.) Now you are laughing stupidly at yourself.

12.) Put this in your profile if you fell for that, and you know you did.

A girl and guy were speeding over 100mph on a motorcycle

Girl: Slow down, I'm scared!

Guy: No, this is fun.

Girl: No, it's not. Please, I'm scared.

Guy: Then tell me you love me.

Girl: I love you, now slow down!

Guy: Now give me a big hug.

She gives him a big hug

Guy: Can you take off my helmet and put it on yourself, it's bothering me.

In the newspaper the next day, a motorcycle had crashed into a building because of break failure. Two people were on it and only one survived. The truth was that halfway down the road, the guy realized his break wasn't working but he didn't want the girl to know. Instead he had her hug him and tell him one last time that she loved him. Then he had her put on his helmet so that she would live even if he died. Copy this onto your profile if you would do the same thing for someone you love.

Girls Don't realize these things;

I'm sorry
that I bought you roses
to tell you that I like you

I'm sorry
That I was raised with respect
not to sleep with you when you were drunk

I'm sorry
That my body's not ripped enough
to "satisfy" your wants

I'm sorry
that I open your car door,
and pull out your chair like I was raised

I'm sorry
That I'm not cute enough
to be "your guy"

I'm sorry
That I am actually nice;
not a jerk

I'm sorry
I don't have a huge bank account
to buy you expensive things

I'm sorry
I like to spend quality nights at home
cuddling with you, instead of at a club

I'm sorry
I would rather make love to you then just screw you
like some random guy.

I'm sorry
That I am always the one you need to talk to,
but never good enough to date

I'm sorry
That I always held your hair back when you threw up, and didn't get mad at you for puking in my car,
but when we went out you went home with another guy

I'm sorry
That I am there to pick you up at 4am when your new man hit you and dropped you off in the middle of nowhere,
but not good enough to listen to me when I need a friend

I'm sorry
If I start not being there because it hurts being used as a door mat, only to be thrown to the side when the new jerk comes around

I'm sorry
If I don't answer my phone anymore when you call, to listen to you cry for hours, instead of getting a couple hours of sleep before work

I'm sorry
that you can't realize.. I've been the one all along.

I'm sorry
If you read this and know somebody like this
but don't care

But most of all

I'm sorry
For not being sorry anymore

I'm sorry
That you can't accept me for who I am

I'm sorry
I can never do anything right, and nothing that I do is good
enough to make it in your world.

I'm sorry
I caught your boyfriend with another girl and told you about it, I thought that was what friends were for...

I'm sorry
That I told you I loved you and actually meant it.

I'm sorry
That I talked to you for nine hours on Thanksgiving when your boyfriend was threatening you instead of spending time with my family.

I'm sorry
That I cared

I'm sorry
that I listen to you at night talking about how you wish you could have done something different.

Ladies always complain and gripe to their friends that there is never any good guys out there, and they always end up with assholes who mistreat them. Well ladies, next time you're complaining, maybe look up to see who you're complaining to, maybe that special someone is right there hanging on your every word as usual, screaming in his head "Why won't you give me a chance?"
Because the person you are usually searching for is right by you.

If you're a guy and you agree with this letter, copy and paste into your profile as 'I'm sorry'

If You're one of the FEW girls with enough BALLS to copy and paste this into your profile, and you would never make your guy feel this way, copy and paste into your profile as 'Girls Don't Realize These Things'

Be Against Abortion!

Month One

Mommy
I am only 8 inches long
but I have all my organs.
I love the sound of your voice.
Every time I hear it
I wave my arms and legs.
The sound of your heart beat
is my favorite lullaby.

Month Two

Mommy
today I learned how to suck my thumb.
If you could see me
you could definitely tell that I am a baby.
I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though.
It is so nice and warm in here.

Month Three

You know what Mommy
I'm a boy!!
I hope that makes you happy.
I always want you to be happy.
I don't like it when you cry.
You sound so sad.
It makes me sad too
and I cry with you even though
you can't hear me.

Month Four

Mommy
my hair is starting to grow.
It is very short and fine
but I will have a lot of it.
I spend a lot of my time exercising.
I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes
and stretch my arms and legs.
I am becoming quite good at it too.

Month Five

You went to the doctor today.
Mommy, he lied to you.
He said that I'm not a baby.
I am a baby Mommy, your baby.
I think and feel.
Mommy, what's abortion?

Month Six

I can hear that doctor again.
I don't like him.
He seems cold and heartless.
Something is intruding my home.
The doctor called it a needle.
Mommy what is it? It burns!
Please make him stop!
I can't get away from it!
Mommy! HELP me!

Month Seven

Mommy
I am okay.
I am in Jesus’ arms.
He is holding me.
He told me about abortion.
Why didn't you want me Mommy?

Every Abortion Is Just . . .

One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak.

If you're against abortion, re-post this!

I would like to honor those that have died in the 9/11 attack by putting this in my profile. If you would like to as well, paste this in your profile and add your name to the list: Tortured Hylian Soul, Shadow Princess 15 (R.I.P Auntie Saria), Sword of the Twili, NightmarePossession, Ocarina of Twilight (May the lord bless their souls), Twilight Being92 (Poor people. I feel sorry for their families), lightheart77 (i wish there was something we could do to make all of that pain go away), Hard-Boiled Egg Devils (May the good lord guide you to the gates of heaven), Kaira-chan15 (May they find peace at the Lord's side)

I would like to dedicate this section of my profile to all those who have ever lost a loved one to cancer. To all those who have lost family to this ultimate evil, copy these lines, and post them to your profile. Include your screen name and the name of the one you lost, and the type of cancer they died by. Hard-Boiled Egg Devils: R.I.P. Grandma Janes Wolfson, died of breast cancer (I hope that you are baking for all the angles in heaven, and sewing with silk of gold), Kaira-chan15: my grandpa on my dad's side, died of lung cancer (I miss you so much, but I hope that you are at peace and are truly happy by God's side)

This is a story about God. Read if you believe in him, and read even if you don't.

A teenage girl about 17 named Diane had gone to visit some friends one evening and time passed quickly as each shared their various experiences of the past year. She ended up staying longer than planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small town and she lived only a few blocks away.

As she walked along under the tall elm trees, Diane asked God to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her. She became uneasy and began to pray, asking for God's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.

The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there. Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep. Thanking the Lord for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story. The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed. The officer thanked Diane for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her. She asked if they would ask the man one question. Diane was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered, "Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her." Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're never alone. Did you know that 98 of teenagers will not stand up for God, and 93 of the people that read this won’t repost it?