My profile's really long so I break them into sections: Starting is my so-called "biography", about my stories, copy and pastes crap, quizzes, and finally quotes.

Nicknames: I have over 53 nicknames. Yes, I have counted them all, I do not use them on a daily basis but I like them so I get people to give me nicknames but I prefer to be called "Dreami" or "Damsel". Yes, Dreami with an "i" because Dreamy with a "y" is a friend's.

Age: 1575638596368078 amazing right? I had witness the birth of the planet!! (I was just a molecule, don't ask how I got into the planet then started developing).

My reviews: I am a critique but I won't flame...well, I have never exactly flamed except for one called "A cinderella's story" or something like that, I can't remember the name but it was written by "Sally" (I can't remember her full penname, yes, I have a bad memory) from fictionpress but ripped off by a girl on FF.net.

I might flame if your story has a Mary-Sue or Gary Stu and since a lot of people don't know what those are, they are perfect OCs meaning those who are beautiful, perfect, flawless, and with a boo-hoo past. I won't flame only for that...maybe. I will possibly flame if your fic is so bad that you don't use spellcheck and goes like this: and narto zad "ilu!!1 zacuru-chan!!1" and has too much chatspeak, I do not expect you to have absolutely perfect grammar and spelling, a few things slip by to a lot of people after all, not everyone is perfect. I mgiht not bother much pointing that out. I will never flame punctuation because that's one of my biggest weakness. I can't use commas right and I don't know how to use semicolons.

About my stories

I am a horrible author and I've been losing inspirations not from reviews but I just did...I've lost my fandom blah blah blah, so I'm not writing anymore and there are only shitfics for you to look at here. My "good " fics(or better said, just a bit better), would be on FictionPress, I'm still working on my English grammar and all of that because English is not my first language and I have problems learning grammar that I even have some problems with my first language.

I have to thank my really bad fics for not attracting flamers back then because they are so bad that they look like troll fics but aren't. Amazed, right? They aren't trollfics! They are free to be flames and sporks because my stupid e-mail won't receive any mail from FF.net or FP, not even password recovery, at least I can get Private Messages thanks to the new inbox things that the site installed (YAY!).

FRIENDS: Never ask for anything to eat or drink.
BEST FRIENDS: Helps themselves and are the reason why you have no food.

FRIENDS: Call your parents by Mr. and Mrs. and Grandpa, by Grandpa.
BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD and MOM and Grandpa, GRAMPS!

FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail.
BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you sayin "THAT WAS FRICKING AWSOME"

FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
BEST FRIENDS: Wont tell everyone else you cried...just laugh about it with you in private when your not down anymore.

FRIENDS: Asks you to write down your number.
BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial.

FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you.
BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography on your life story...

FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing.
BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds butt that left you

FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door.
BEST FRIENDS: Walk right in and say "I'M HOME."

FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell anyone.
BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell.

FRIENDS: Are only through high school/college. (aka: drinking buddies)
BEST FRIENDS: Are for life.

FRIENDS: Will confort you when the guy rejects you
BEST FRIENDS: Will go up to him and say 'its becuase your gay isn't it?'

FRIENDS: Would ignore this letter
BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this!!

I am the prostitute working the streets because nobody will hire a transsexual woman.

I am the sister who holds her gay brother through the painful, tear-filled nights.

We are the parents who buried their daughter long before her time.

I am the man who died alone in the hospital because they would not let my partner of twenty-seven years into the room.

I am the foster child who wakes up with nightmares of being taken away from the two fathers who are the only loving family I ever had. I wish they could adopt me.

I am one of the lucky ones, I guess. I survived the attack that left me in a coma for three weeks, and in another year I will probably be able to walk again.

I am not one of the lucky ones. I killed myself just weeks before graduating high school. It was simply too much to bear.

We are the couple who had a realtor hang up on us when she found out we wanted to rent a one-bedroom for two men.

I am the person who never knows which bathroom I should use if I want to avoid getting management called on me.

I am the mother who is not allowed to even visit the children I bore, nursed, and raised. The court said I am an unfit mother because I now live with a another woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who found the support system grow suddenly cold and distant when they found out my abusive partner is also a woman.

I am the domestic-violence survivor who has no support who has no support system to turn to because I am male.

I am the father who has never hugged his son because I grew up afraid to show affection to other men.

I am the home-economics teacher who always wanted to teach gym until someone told me that only lesbians do that.

I am the man who died when the paramedics stopped treating me as soon as they realized I was transsexual.

I am the person who feels guilty because I think I could be a much better person if I did not have to deal with society hating me.

I am a the man who stopped attending church, not becuase I don't believe, but because they closed their doors to my kind.

I am the person who has to hide what this world needs most: love.

I am the person who is afraid of telling his loving Christian parents that he loves another male.

Re-post this if you believe homophobia is wrong. Please do your part to end it

ThInGs To PoNdEr:

What happens if you get scared half to death... twice?
You laugh at me because I'm diferent and I laugh at you because you're all the same.
Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin?
Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?
Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?
Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"?
Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance that little indestructible black box is?
Can fat people go skinny-dipping?
If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation?
If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose? So what's the speed of dark? How come abbreviated is such a long word?
Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?
Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag? A bus station is where a bus stops.
A train station is where a Train stops On my desk, I have a work station..
If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"?
Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks?
Should women put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans?
Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office?
What are we supposed to do . . . write to these men?
How much deeper would oceans be if sponges didn't live there?
If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
After eating, do amphibians need to wait an hour before getting OUT of the water?
Why don't they just make mouse-flavored cat food?
If you're sending someone some Styrofoam, what do you pack it in?
Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections?
Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?
Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse?
Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it?
Why can't you find fresh sardines in the fish market?
Why do so many old people eat at cafeterias?
Why does an "X" stand for a kiss?
Why does the word "Filipino" start with the letter F ?
Why are the copyright dates on movies and television shows written in Roman numbers?

By MarsMonster that changes her penname once in a while and is now "Cascades of Serenity"

How come insane is being crazy if you're INside of SANITY?
Why do you rest in labor day, the day of work?

added by dreamer789

STOP ANIMAL ABUSE IF YOU'RE AGAINST ANIMAL ABUSE POST THIS ON YOUR BIO

1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex.

2. Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, and green, yellow?

3. Your first initial?

4. Your month of birth?

5. Which color do you like more, black or white?

6. Name of a person of the same sex as yours.

7. Your favorite number?

8. Do you like California or Florida more?

9. Do you like the lake or the ocean more?

10. Write down a wish (a realistic one).

Are you done?

If so, scroll down

(Don’t cheat--)

THE ANSWERS

1. You are completely in love with this person.

2. If you choose:

Red: You are alert and your life is full of love.

Black: You are conservative and aggressive.

Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back.

Blue: You are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you love.

Yellow: You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are down.

3. If you’re initial is:

A-K: You have a lot of love and friendships in your life.

L-R: You try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is soon to blossom.

S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks very good.

4. If you were born in:

Jan.-Mar.: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you fall in love with someone totally unexpected.

Apr.-June: You will have a strong love relationship that will not last long but the memories will last forever.

July-Sept.: You will have a great year and will experience a major life changing experience for the good.

Oct.-Dec.: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your soul mate.

5. If you choose...

Black: Your life will take on a different direction; it will seem hard at the time but will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change.

White: You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do anything for you, but you may not realize it.

6. This person is your best friend.

7. This is how many close friends you have in a lifetime.

8. If you choose...
California: You like adventure.
Florida: You are a laidback person.

9. If you choose...
Lake: You are loyal to your friends and your love. And you are very reserved.
Ocean: You are spontaneous and like to please people.

10. This wish will come true only if you RE-POST THIS BULLETIN in one hour and it will come true before your next birthday!

18 or lower means you’re not stupid.

x -Gum has fallen out of your mouth when you were talking.
x -Gum has fallen out of your mouth when you were NOT talking.
x -You have ran into a glass/screen door.
You have jumped out of a moving vehicle.
x -You have thought of something funny and laughed, then people gave you weird looks.
total= 1

x -You have ran into a tree.
It IS possible to lick your elbow
x -You just tried to lick your elbow.
x -You never knew that the Alphabet and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star have the same rhythm.
x -You just tried to sing them.
x -You have tripped on your shoelace and fallen.
x -You have choked on your own spit.
x -You have seen the the Matrix and still don’t get it.

x -You didn’t notice that in the last question “the” was spelled twice

x -You just looked at it.Your hair is blonde/dirty blonde. (How does this make you stupid?)

x -People have called you slow.

total so far= 5

You have accidentally caught something on fire
x -You tried to drink out of a straw, but it went into your nose/eyes/cheek.
x -You have caught yourself drooling.
You’ve fallen asleep in class
If someone says “fart” you laugh.
x -You just laughed.

total so far= Still 5

x -Sometimes you just stop thinking
x -You tell a story and forget what you were talking about
x -People are often shaking their heads and walking away from you
You are often told to use your “inside voice”.
x -You use your fingers to do simple math.

total so far= 7

x -You have eaten a bug.
x -You are taking this test when you should be doing something important
x -You have put your clothes on backwards or inside out, and didn’t realize it
x -You’ve looked all over for something and realized it was in your hand or pocket

total so far= 9

You sometimes post bulletins because you are scared that what they say will happen to you if you don’t even when you know it won’t happen to you.
x -You break a lot of things.
Your friends know not to use big words around you
x -You sometimes tilt your head when you’re confused
x -You have fallen out of your chair before (If it's because I saw prn and I wasn't the only one who fell off because of that?)
x -When you’re laying in bed, you try to find pictures in the texture of the ceiling

total so far= 10

YAY 10! I'm actually surprised and happy! =D (it seems to make me more stupid)

BEST QUOTE: "Money can't buy happiness nor love." THAT'S FRIGGIN BULLSHIT!! I see a hobo and he's sad as hell and willing to commit suicide then I look at a millionaire and I see the happiest man in the world! quoted by an awesome friend.

QUOTES:

NYUH!! MY BROTHER'S STUPID HABITS ARE IN MY SYSTEM !! I NOW COPY ANIME HABITS IF I GET REALLY INTO THEM !! By Jojo

Sentence "My dad took me to the stadium."

"Ok, who can turn this sentence into a passive sentence?" My English grammar teacher asked and we all tried guessing but no one could till a guy said "The stadium took me to my dad." but the teacher then just said "Riiiight...that's a nice cartoon."

By classmate

Me(when I had noobish grammar and all of that): so how is your apple friend? did you kill it? -looks at the dead apple with a knife stabbed in it- It been so quite.

dreamgirl555: My apple friend had a shoe accident. :(

Immortal A: Shoe accident means that she stept in to a dog crap?

dreamgirl555: SHE'S AN APPLE! HOW CAN SHE STEP IN DOG CRAP!? lol! She got stepped on by a shoe! :)

Me: Dat meens dat i can deefeet u! (Mispelling was fun back then, I did it all on purpose knowing that it was wrong)

dreamgirl555: Nu-uh!! i'll ve vight backz avter i go potty.

(Commercial) In a wedding:

Priest: And do you Paul, take Kate as your lawfully wedded wife?

Paul: ...-5 seconds later-

Friend: Hey Paul, do you like nachos?

Paul: I do.

Then the organ plays and the couple ends up married. Quoted in a commercial.

9 Things I Hate About Everyone:

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.. I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

2 People who are willing to get off their butt to search the entire room for the T.V.. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.

3 When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". darn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

4 When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? Gonna Kick their asses!

5 When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Loser, I paid 12 to come to the cinema and stare at the darn floor.

6 People who ask "Can I ask you a question?". Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?

7. When something is 'new and improved!' Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.

8 When people say "life is short". What the heck?? Life is the longest darn thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer? (dreamer789: unless a baby died during birth...or had gotten killed at a young age.)

9 When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbie?

The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said: "Listen sir...when I was born I was BLACK, When I grew up I was BLACK, When I'm sick I'm BLACK, When I go in the sun I'm BLACK, When I'm cold I'm BLACK, When I die I'll be BLACK. But you sir, When you're born you're PINK, When you grow up you're WHITE, When you're sick, you're GREEN, When you go in the sun you turn RED, When you're cold you turn BLUE, And when you die you turn PURPLE. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away...
Post this on your profile if you hate racism

On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)

On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(and that would be how?)

On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's 'just' a suggestion!)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late! you lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save more time? Whose body?)

On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)

On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(One would hope!)

On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(hmm..something must have gotten lost in the translation...)

On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to use in outer space.)

On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
(but no peas?)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(somebody got paid big bucks to write this one...)

On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this.)

On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)

Zen For Those Who Take Life Too Seriously

1. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
2. Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7 of your week.
3. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.
4. Get a new car for your spouse. It'll be a great trade!
5. Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.
6. Always try to be modest, and be proud of it!
7. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand...
8. OK, so what's the speed of dark?
9. How do you tell when you're out of invisible ink?
10. If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.
11. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
12. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
13. Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.
14. If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
15. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?
16. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
17. What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
18. I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.
19. I couldn't repair your brake, so I made your horn louder.
20. Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
21. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened.
22. Just remember - if the world didn't suck, we would all fall off.
23. Light travels faster than sound. That is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
24. Save the whales. Collect the whole set.
25. A day without sunshine is like night.
26. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
27. Getting lost in thought may put you in unfamiliar territory.
28. 42.7 of all statistics are made up on the spot.
29. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
30. You're diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
31. Honk if you love peace and quiet.
32. Remember that half the people you know are below average.
33. Despite the high cost of living, it's still extremely popular.
34. He who laughs last thinks slowest.
35.The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
36. Drive way too fast and you don't have to worry about cholesterol.
37. If you intend to live forever, so far, so good.
38. Borrow money only from pessimists; they don't expect it back.
39. Support bacteria; they're the only culture some people have.
40. If at first you don't succeed, destroy the evidence.
41. A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
42. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
43. For every action there is an equal and opposite criticism.
44. Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of cheques.
45. No one is listening until you make a mistake.
46. Success always occurs in private; failure, in full view.
47.The colder the x-ray table, the more of your body is required on it.
48.The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the ability to reach it.
49.To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
50.To succeed in politics, it is often necessary to rise above your principles.
51.You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive.
52.The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard (and not enough chlorine!)
53. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
54. If you think nobody cares try missing a couple of payments.
55. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.