Wow. I promised I'd return in a week or two, didn't I? And that was... a good two months ago? Or was it three? --cringes--

Anyhow, I ain't gonna bore you all with excuses. I'm afraid that life has finally caught up with me, however, and is swiftly pulling me under. Hence fanfiction has been forgotten for the moment, as I do all I can to keep on top of it all. I figured I should inform you all, as life doesn't look like letting up anywhere in the near future. You needn't lose hope altogether; my fanfiction is still my delight and the moment I catch a fair chunk of elusive spare time I'll be back with a vengeance.

For fairness sake, however, I'm not going to be posting any more of my stories until I've finished the whole of Palantir, and, given my current rate of production, that happy day might not arrive until I'm firmly planted in some rest home...

--wipes away a tear--

Simply put, I am here to bid adieu to you all and put my account on hiatus. Yes, the dreaded words... sigh I may possibly still be about reading and attempting to review the fics I'm still following, but that's about it, I'm afraid.

--waves forlornly--

A BIT ABOUT ME:

First and foremost I am a Christian - yes, one of those scary ranting Bible toting people. While we tend to have a reputation for being stuffy, close-minded wackos, I really do think a lot about why I believe what I do and question it a lot, and I don't just believe stuff without seeing a lot of evidence for it, and consequently don't really fit with any denomination . So while I cannot really blame anyone for thinking me wacko, I'd protest that I'm anything but stuffy.

I live in a small town in the heart of New Zealand. Yes, you may feel free to envy me - if you know where it is. Despite its being one of the most awesome places in the world, a whole lot of people don't know where it is, Americans being especially bad. When I was over there earlier this year several people thought it was somewhere near China, one woman thought in was in Africa, and another guy told me it was beside Greece. But the worst of the lot were those who thought it was a state in Australia. Can you imagine anything more insulting? If you think New Zealand is part of Australia, go away and look up a map. Then, and only then, will I speak to you.

I love reading. I'll read almost anything, from Humour to Fantasy to Classics to deep and flowery Theology stuff. As a child of about ten my favourite book was Homer's Illiad. I read it goodness knows how many times, in the unabridged old English language (although it was translated from the Greek). I read it again recently, and pretty much it's the story of a massacre, describing in detail how each man in the army was killed, and how their friends got revenge by killing other people, etc, etc, etc. Really it's horrendous. But I drank it all in...

Now I go for somewhat tamer stuff. I love many old classics, the language and sentence structure they use is just magnificent, and can often send me into fangirlish fits of talking Old English. Then there's the lighter side - ever read the Dullitch Choronicles? You should, they're hilarious, and very, very well written. I'm also a Lord of the Rings fanatic - how could I not be, when I practically live in Middle Earth? Though I'm a movie fan, however, it's the world of John Ronald Reuel Tolkien that I've fallen in love with. The history and lore he's poured into his books - it takes my breath away.

I am a devoted Middle Earth fan, and I don't expect I will write about much else, however I may surprise myself... currently I'm actually considering writing something for Enid Blyton. No, I am not a fan of her writing - that's the point. However, I was - that's also the point. I inhabit several other fandoms when LotR gets flooded in trash, mostly Fairy Tales at the moment (Have a look at Slipshod's A Difference of Principles on my favourites list, it's awesome), although I've also just rediscovered Star Wars.

I don't read Slash. Yes, frankly, I am a Homophobe. I find such people, and stories, rather scary. Some of the pairings are just - freaky. Then there are Mary-Sues... I won't go there. But if you want to read a really, really good insert fic, go to Don't Panic and OK, Now Panic, both of which are on my favourites list. They're long, but they're worth reading.

Usually I stay away from romance too, unless it's written or recommended to me by someone I know is a good writer, not because I necessarily don't like it, but because at least 70 per-cent of it has got to be written by hormonal teenage girls who can't write. Not that I have anything against hormonal teenage girls - I deeply sympathise and I know what they're going through, as am one myself. It's those that can't or don't bother to write properly I can't abide.

MY TAKE ON FLAMES, FLAME RISING AND THE FORUM WARS:

When I first got here and saw flames I thought What jerks! and felt righteously indignant that anyone would treat any author that way. Then I discovered the screeds of Mary-Sues and horrible writing littering this place and decided that Flamers might have a point, after all. Then I stumbled across The Fireplace and discovered Flame Rising.

Believe it or not, the Flamers are usually really, really nice people when you get to know them, and they flame for a good reason, and a completely understandable one. Most of them are very good writers themselves, and they are as fed up as I am over the garbage filling our fandoms. Through lurking in the Fireplace I've developed a lot of respect for Flame Rising and many of his lackeys, as well as many of his arch enemies.

Yet while I sympathise with their motivations, I will never be a flamer. The line between Flames and Harsh Constructive Criticism is a fine one, but I believe there is a definite one, and it lies in the subject of the criticism. Constructive criticism, however harsh, is criticising the story, while flames are criticising the author. I can see the value in harshly criticising a story; things here are published to the public and must have a decent amount of effort put into them, and the authors must be willing to receive criticism if they open their work to the public. On top of this this is a fanfiction website, one must respect the canon of the fandom one is writing for if one hopes to be taken seriously. We have the right to pull people up about these things. But I can not see any reason why the criticism should be directed at the author rather than the faults in the story.

As for the Forum wars, I explored the forums for about a month, just lurking and watching the various parties and people. A lot can happen in a month, and I think I've become well acquainted with the things going on around there. I've seen a whole lot of great friendships grow, I've seen people helping new writers and sharing tips things they've learned over the years here, I've seen a lot of laughter and fun and friendship. I've also seen people hurt and made fun of, friendships broken, and a whole lot of immaturity and snarkiness. And in the end, I spent hours and hours online and neglected my writing. I wouldn't call that time wasted - I've learned a lot! But in the end I decided that I came here to write, and the forums aren't going to help me do that. So I'm not going to get involved.

STORY STATUS:

Palantir: Next chapter coming up very soon, I'm just working out the last details. You should see it coming some time this week.

I was trying to keep this to only six chapters long, but due to some timeline troubles I may have to add another chapter, and I'm thinking of doing a short epilogue too. After all, ending a story with your main character burning to death just isn't... nice.

It delves deeply into Denethor, so he and Gondor consume my thoughts currently, as well as such questions as:

Did Tolkien ever come up with names for any cities in Harad?

Who was Denethor's mother? What was she like, and what happened to her?

What did Thorongil do to capture Ecthelion's heart so completely, over his own son?

Why does Tolkien insist on having his heroines die of grief?

Etc etc etc... if you want to be plagued with unanswerable questions for the rest of your days, I would highly recommend writing a fanfic. And if you know the answer to any of these questions, please, please, tell me, and I'll be eternally in your debt. I've honestly searched everywhere.

FUTURE STORIES:

Just the LotR has enough history to keep me writing for centuries, let alone the Silmarillion and Histories, however, I'm considering dropping it to turn to Enid Blyton, of all things. Such a story would include far more desperate criminals, intelligent police officers, a few kids who don't always land on their feet when they get mixed up in things too big for them, and some Major Character Deaths.

I'd also love to write about Tar-Miriel - I'd love to write something about the fall of Numenor, their corruption and the political struggle that went on there, as well as Sauron's dabbling in it. Tar-Miriel seems a prime victim...

Harad - I'd like to write something from their perspective (maybe from the POV of a princess? Or maybe just one of the townsfolk) around about the time of Numenor, when the Numenorians ruled Umbar and were really oppressing them, and Sauron came and twisted their anger and rebellion to his own purposes. They are such great people, and Tolkien has left so much room for artistic frenzy. I mean, he hasn't even named any of their cities, except for Umbar, and that doesn't really count, as it wasn't really theirs. However, the complete lack of information has made this quite a daunting task, so it may be a while before you see any of this.

Helm Hammerhand - As he is the complete opposite to Denethor, who I am currently struggling over, I am longing to drop Palantir and write him. Of course, I won't, but his turn may come next. He fascinates me. I mean, the man single-handedly (literally) started the civil war in Rohan, lost his country to bandits, caused the death of hundreds of his people, went mad and died by running around in the snow with hardly anything on, and yet he is to this day held up by his people as a hero! Either the people of Rohan are stranger than I thought, or there is more to this guy than meets the eye...

FAVOURITE QUOTES:

Even a fool appears wise until he opens his mouth ~ The Bible

Every great oak tree started out as a couple of nuts who decided to stand their ground ~ Anonymous

He is no fool who gives what he can not keep to gain what he can not lose ~ Jim Elliot

Snippity snip goes the rest - If you're part of the small minority who have time for reading random stuff, your time would be better spent reading my story, and if that doesn't appeal to you, one of the ones on my favourites list. They're all very good, and there are a whole lot of different genres there, from humour to romance to angst. There are some great stories here, however difficult to find they may be!