WARNING! Due to raging alcoholism scientists agree that 99.999 of what I say/write is not appropriate for anyone.

If you are nursing, pregnant, under the age of nineteen, over the age of nineteen, are human, can be classified as not human, eat with your mouth, see with your eyes, or have/had any health problems you are at risk of the following side effects:

Nausea, heart burn, indigestion, upset stomach, spontaneous combustion, genetic mutations, infertility, and death.

Naito

P.S. I have a life outside the Internet, so if updates take awhile, it's because I am busy. I do work three jobs...

Sorry for the inconvenience. I will update when I can!

Note: My favourites lists are actually not likely favourites. Just stories I'm that have caught my eye and I'll get around to reading later...I say this because I don't want you to think I'm recommending them, it's more or less just a bookmark list. If you want to know what I truly recommend, check my favourite authors list!

In the Works: Notices about stories that are to soon be posted/updated.

Nanny and the Ninjas: This fic is essentially the most retarded idea I have ever had and therefore. I should be shot and pissed on. Anyway, I will continue it shortly, but I want to revamp it a little first. The current chapters don't sit well with me. The writing doesn't anyway...

First Love, and Lost: Has been removed due to lack of interest and lack of willpower to continue it.

Invasion of The Mary-Sues: On Hiatus until further notice. I've kind of fallen out of the loop with this one, but I promise to force myself back in there soon.

Konoha Sellers: Nine chapters posted. I also went ahead and replaced all the documents so the format of each chapter was the same. The tenth is written. I literally just finished it and the eleventh is burning inside my brain. As soon as I get the eleventh properly started and going, I'll post ten. For now, I'm going to get some sleep though, I have work tomorrow.

Personal Revelation/Parallel: Both these titles are one shots and they happen to be connected, hence same spot here. PP was the first, and PR the second and it already has more hits than KS. Only a few reviews though... Oh well.

Selfish: This was a one shot. A self-indulgent one shot completely circling my love for Mori. However, I've been toying with this other story idea and thought I might use this as a reference of sorts. As in this will be mentioned by the characters... I don't know. I have a zillion other things to finish first.

Stats: Because you don't care...

Hair: Brown

Eyes: Blue/Grey/Green/Brown...etc...it depends on my mood

Height: 5'8" ish?...yeah, I'm tall

Weight: 142 pounds

Age: 20

Country: Canada

Employed: Yes, I am a Kitchen Wench on weekend evenings and a Sales Whore on weekdays.

Music: Everything

Instrument: Bass Guitar

Status: Seeing my Boyfriend ~ Billy (Jacob is still my soul mate...and Jia is my wife)

Smoke: Yes, Benson & Hedges are the preferred but I occasionally change it up.

Drink: I love Vodka. Anyone who has read one of my fics may be aware of this.

Drugs: I must say, Don't do drugs...but I'm a hypocrite for I do smoke a fair amount of pot and plan to give acid a try. Done other stuff, but it wasn't my style.

Homophobia: Well, no. I've written same sex stories. In fact, I find homophobia a big turn off - I broken off a relationship because of it.

Preferred method of torture: Run on sentences that never seem to stop no matter how badly you want them to and for some reason I can't stop myself so I do it all the time and it's just my rambling, pointless style.

Writing style: Crack. I blame my alcoholism

If for whatever reason, you feel compelled to know more about me, don't be afraid to ask. I'm fairly open and honest. Also, don't be afeared (haha) to click my homepage link. It's my MSN Space, which is an eclectic mess, much like me.

Are you looking for a Beta Reader or Editor? Contact Me, I'll help you out even if I don't know the series. Please consider that I am already playing beta for other people, so if I don't supply an immediate answer or I say no, that's the reason.

Check out these good folks that I beta for!

Daddy's Little Hippy