Hello there! I'm Lilly (Ok, so I'm really Abby...but call me Lilly..or Abby...on second thought i don't care...)! please check out my stories and review them!

Also, check out my best friend, MollyWHOAFTW. (but be prepared for all the Repo-ness)

85 PERCENT OF PEOPLE HAVE MOVED ONTO THE DARK KNIGHT. COPY AND PASTE THIS IF YOU'RE PART OF THE 15 PERCENT WHO STILL SKIPS AROUND SINGING EPIPHANY AT THE TOP OF THEIR LUNGS.

You say pink

I say red

You say Joe Jonas of the Jonas Brothers

I say David Draiman of Disturbed

You say Justin Bieber

I say Justin Timberlake

You say Twilight

I say Sweeney Todd

You say Orlando Bloom

I say Johnny Depp

You say Taylor Swift

I say Carrie Underwood (but Taylor's not that bad)

You say Edward

I say James

You say I'm weird

I say I'm proud to be different

You say you're done talking

I yell "FINISHED!"

A NOTE TO MY READERS:

I want to thank my frequent readers, due to the fact that they are so darn patient! I know I've been pretty slow lately, but what keeps me coming back at all is my reviewers!

Just updated My Reason For Living. I'm thinking of making it about 3 or 4 more chapters. My real struggle is how to end it; I hope you'll all be patient with me for the time being while I write!

In between chapters, one-shots are sure to come!

Keep reading and reviewing!

Love and Hugs,

NellieTodd

(Updated: 1/8/12)

STORIES IN THE MAKING:

My Reason for Living (Sweeney Todd)

Somewhere A Place for Us (Sweeney Todd) (on hold)

It Hurts (Ouran High School Host Club)

COMPLETED STORIES:

A Razor and a Bottle of Gin (Sweeney Todd)

Odd Jobs (Sweeney Todd)

What Would Alice Do? (Twilight)

Incomplete (Phantom of the Opera)

Sick Day (Sweeney Todd)

Facade (Sweeney Todd)

Give My Apologies to Broadway (Ouran HSHC)

TITLES OF STORIES TO COME:

Fuckin' Perfect

The Ouran High School Host Club...Rock Band??

Robbed of my Heart

That's the Throat to Slit

Alice Didn't Know

Revenge

Now, a little bit about myself...

I am 17 years old and have been writing fanfiction, would you believe, since I was five. I have always toyed with the "What if this happened..." ideas and now that I'm older and this website exsists, it's easier for me to really write them down.

In case you haven't yet noticed, I have an obsession with Sweeney Todd. I don't care what you think, I "Lovett" (ha ha; puns!)Most of my stories are about the barber and the baker; DEAL WITH IT!

I am a very open-minded person. I like reading different ideas of some of the unusual fanfics I see. However, I don't like and refuse to read certain things; for example, if you wrote a story about Mrs. Lovett and Toby...doin' the nasty... or a fic of Haruhi and her dad...in the middle of the night...yeah, THAT is something I find particularly disturbing. I have read the book Living Dead Girl by Elizabeth Scott, (and have a fanfic idea for it) but that's as far as I will go in that area ( my reasons for that, being, it was an interesting book, it wasn't horribly graphic in terms of sex, and not to mention, well-written.)

Though I can be a "Grammar Nazi", I must warn that, hypocritically, I am possibly the world's WORST speller! (D-o-g spells cat...c-a-t spells Rhode Island :D ) And yes, I am very picky when it comes to format of a story; If it's all in one paragraph, how can ANYONE read that?? Details are also one of my favorite things to see in a story.

Oh, regarding reviews...(As of today, Sept. 3, 2011) I shall start responding to my reviews IN THE CHAPTER NOTES with my next update. PLEASE leave a review, even if you hate the story! Even if you just want to say, "Nice job!" or "I like it." that's fine! BUT PLEASE REVIEW!

Lastly, in regards to cyberbullying, homophobia, stereotyping to the point of mocking, and/or racisim, you should know that I tolerate NONE of that and will be up your arse about it!

Now sit back, relax and enjoy the rest of my profile...and all my stories!

Love and Hugs,

-NellieTodd

MY TOP 5 FAVORITE BANDS AND SONGS BY THEM:

Evanescence: Lies, Erase This and All That I'm Living For

Slipknot: Everything Ends, Vendetta and Eeyore

Beatles: Can'tBuy Me Love, Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds and Ob-La-Di,Ob-La-Da

Disturbed: Inside the Fire, Violence Fetish and Believe

Backstreet Boys: EveryBody (Backstreet's Back) Larger Than Life and Incomplete

MY TOP 5 FAVORITE SINGERS:

P!nk: Fuckin' Perfect, Please Don't Leave Me, It's All Your Fault, and Just Like a Pill

Billy Joel: Only the Good Die Young, Piano Man and The Stranger

Gabriella Cilmi: Boys, Don't Want to go to Bed, and Cigarettes and Lies

Eminem: Sing for the Moment, The Real Slim Shady and My Dad's Gone Crazy

Demi Lovato: Get Back, In Real Life, and Skyscraper

MY TOP 5 FAVORITE BRAODWAY SHOWS:

Sweeney Todd: I saw the movie version in middle school and it brought back the love of broadway I had had as a child. The next thing I knew I was listening to soundtracks again and begging my parents to take me to shows. I owe a lot to the movie version of this and I wish they'd put the whole thing back on broadway!

Chicago: Just the epicness of the music. I really love Jazz music, and this also gives character to women, that doesn't involve falling head over heels for a man. No, instead of being a love-sick bitch, Roxie is a devious little bitch who puts on a "I'm so cute and innocent" front. I love it!

Phantom of the Opera: This show is...this show...IT IS IMPOSSIBLE TO DESCRIBE THIS SHOW AND HOW AMAZING IT IS!!!

Wicked: I've seen it twice and I love how someone had the idea to show the Wicked Witch's side of the story. it also takes a stab at prejudices and how people can be so damn judgemental!

RENT: The songs from this show can always put a big smile on my face, no matter what mood I'm in! (La Vie Boheme especially!)

"You just gotta 'Lovett'" -my friend Suzanne

My friend Ilana: I'm about to die a horrible, morbid, cruel, disgusting death..

Me: You mean a chorus concert?

Ilana: Exactly!

Stupid girl: (sees my Sweeney Todd decor in my locker) Oh can you decortate my locker just like that?

Me: No...first you have to see Sweeney Todd

Girl: oh i watch that show all the time!

Other kid: It's a movie, you asshole!

Girl: Oh! It's a movie! Well, i watch the DVD all the time!

Me: Ok. then what's Sweeney Todd's real name?

Girl: (with such certainty in her voice) Todd!

(Is watching Alice in Wonderland with Matt, and i'm pointing out all the Harry Potter/Sweeney Todd actors in it)

Me: And the dog is voiced by Timothy Spall...in Sweeney Todd he was the Beadle, in Harry Potter, he was...oh shit...what was his name? The one who got turned into Ron's rat?

Matt: Peter Petti- *remebers what he looks like* ew.

My Friend Melissa: Oh-Em-jay!

Me: What?

Melissa: omg...

Me: oh it sounded like you said "Oh, i'm gay"

Melissa: (sarcastically) that too!

Me: Oh that explains why you love Rob Pattinson!

Melissa: (evil glare)

My friend Frank: In soviet Russia, women rape you!

My friend Ethan: tecnically, they do now..

Frank: (in russian accent) SHUT UP!!!

(Is texting my friend Toniann)

Me: You wanna hang out Monday?

Toniann: Sure!

Me: Yay! Who's house?

Toniann: Can I come over there, please? I love your house!

Me: ...you just love my temperpedic bed...

Toniann: YES!!!

Me: (Facebook Status) Welp. *points wand to head* Avada Kedavra!

Billy: Expelliarmus before you finish the spell.

Me: :D

Billy: Portrificas Totalas

Me: ...oh well now that's just a dirty move.

Billy :)

Definetly, the best movies ever!

SWEENEY TODD, REPO! The Genetic Opera, The Ring, Edward Scissorhands, New Moon (because of JCB), Harry Potter, The Unborn, Corpse Bride, Nightmare Before Christmas, Coraline, Hard Candy, Chicago, RENT, SAW, Vampires Suck, Pirates of the Caribbean, The Producers, Hunchback of Notre Dame and Aladdin.

you know you're obsessed with Sweeney Todd when you:
~Get nervous when you go for a haircut
~Go as a character for halloween
~Laugh whenever someone says "I love it!"
~Stop cringing at bloody movies
~Not only get the DVD of the Tim Burton version, but also get the DVD of the original broway play and the book A String of Pearls
~Cry at the end
~Argue with your friends over who's more obsessed
~Try to find meat pies on the menu at the diner
~Have the Ballad of Sweeney Todd stuck in your head 24/7
~At the end of the movie, scream "NO TOBY, DON'T DO IT!!" even though you know what's gonna happen.
~Go to see New Moon just because it had Jamie Campbell Bower in it
~Go to see Harry Potter because Helena Bonham Carter, Timothy Spall, Alan Rickman and Jamie Campbell are in it
~When Someone asks, "What is this?" you automatically sing, "smells like piss!"
~Now wanna see Bruno because you think Sacha Baron Cohen looks really good in tight pants.
~Have a completely new respect for broadway.
~Can't go through a day without hearing the music.
~Get excited when you see a razor.
~Want to go to London just so you can walk down Fleet Street.
~Know all the actors names from the movie, including those of Mr. Fogg and the Beggar Woman.
~Have worn Mrs. Lovett or Sweeney hair to school.
~Looked at a picture of Sweeney holding a razor to Mrs. Lovett's neck and wished you were her at the point.
~Learned every word to every song, including the ones from the show.
~Know who Len Cairou and George Hearn are.
~Want to go see A Little Night Music becuase Angela Lansbury is in it
~Get excited whenever you see/hear the names Tim Burton/Johnny Depp/Helena Bonham Carter/ Timothy Spall/Alan Rickman/ Angela Lansbury/Len Cairou/George Hearn/Ed Sanders/Stephen Sondhiem/Sacha Baron Cohen/Ken Jennings/Jamie Campbell Bower/Jayne Weisner
~Wish that you could've been in Johanna's place in the trunk to watch the Judge's demise.
~Did everything on this list and many other things. i know i did!

If you agree that Ed Sanders is one of the luckiest, cutest and most talented actors out there, copy and paste this!

If you’ve ever purposely walked into a wall, copy and paste this!

If you’ve ever acted drunk, copy and paste this!

If you’ve ever gotten Naked (ha ha) copy and paste this!

If you think they oughta put Repo! on Broadway, copy and paste this!

If you think they oughta put Sweeney Todd, the Producers and Spamalot back on Broadway, copy and paste this!

If you’ve ever yelled “I DON’T LIKE SPAM!” in the middle of the hallway, and/or you know what that is from, copy and paste this!

If you agree that James is 10,000,000 times hotter than Edward Cullen, copy and paste this!

If you think Family Guy and the Simpsons kick South Park’s arse, copy and paste this!

If you love Ouran High School Host Club and are not sure why, copy and paste this!

If you hate it when people say that Angela Lansbury is better than Helena Bonham Carter and vise-versa, copy and paste this! (seriously, they both are awesome Mrs. Lovetts!!)

If you ever confused a prep, copy and paste this.

If you think Sweeney Todd needs a big hug, copy and paste this!

If you think racism is wrong, copy and paste this!

If you hate homophobia copy and paste this!

If you hate bullies, copy and paste this!

If Zydrate comes in a little glass vile, copy and paste this!

If you recently went to a hospital and half-expected to see Dr. House, copy and paste this!

If you have't copied and pasted any of the above, copy and paste this!

If you’ve copied and pasted more than 3 of these, copy and paste this!

If you’ve copied and pasted more than 5 of the above, GET A LIFE!

I’m in love with Sweeney Todd.

Yes I know it does sound odd.

But then I saw him kill those gentlemen,

And I knew I’d never be the same again!

I’ll trod the path that few have trod,

For Sweeney Todd!

Show me the way to Fleet Street!

The pre-Hannah Montana/Justin Bieber/Twilight/iCarly era kicked ass!

Here are 50 good reasons:

Pop music was amazing!

People had to be able to act to get on TV

Courage the Cowardly Dog

Dream Street

Aaron Carter

Brandy and Mr. Whiskers

Old school Nickelodeon bumpers

Justin Timberlake

Guys hit puberty by age 15

Harry Potter

The Amanda Show

People weren’t all obnoxious prep bitches with high pitched laughs

Metallica

Green Day

Early Spongebob and FOP

Kim Possible

A*Teens

Stevie Brock

Backstreet Boys

All That!

PowerPuff Girls

Real vampires

TV shows with an ORIGINAL plot

Rugrats

Nickel-O-zone (who else remembers that?) and SlimeTimeLive

Barbie’s that weren’t repetitive remakes of earlier versions

Popsicle Zone commercials

Dave the Barbarian

N*SYNC

Old-style Avril Lavigne

Pixel Perfect

Aly and AJ

Gusher commercials that weren’t stupid

S Club 7

Dragon Tales (early episodes before Enrique. I’m not being racist I’m just saying the damn show was just fine.)

Six Flag commercials with the dancing old guy

Wild Thornberry’s

Holes

Goosebumps

Series of Unfortunate events

That’s So Raven

Life with Derek

Mandy Moore

Old-style Rihanna

Animaniacs

When people heard Disney, they thought of Mickey Mouse, not Hannah Montana!

Recess

Naturally Sadie

Mean Girls

the first HSM (when it was new…that was the turning point!)

if you can recognize any of these or remember them you were either not born then or are a fangirl wannabe idiot!

My favorite quotes:

"I have red lips!"-Molly

"It's over there in Guam"-Amanda

"Fly along with me, i can't quite make it alone." - Foo Fighters

"Candy is dandy, but diamonds just might get you laid!” –unknown

"ABU!"- me and Molly

"Excuse me while i randomly walk into this wall..." -me

“I’M GOING TO RAPE YOU!” –Guy Who Yells At His Cats For No Reason.

"And the hammer isn't my fists...The hammer is my penis..." Captain Hammer

"RANDOM POPTART!" -Tiffany

"How are yeeewww?" -Matt

Ten Character Test!

1)Sweeney Todd
2)Edward Scissorhands
3)Mrs. Lovett
4) Bellatrix
5) Toby Ragg
6) Tamaki Suoh
7) Jack Skellington
8)Graverobber
9) Samara Morgan
10) Anthony Hope

What would you do if:

1. Number 5 (Toby) was stranded on the toilet because he was out of paper?

Go “aww! You poor thing!” and get him a fresh roll

2. You came home one day and found Number 3 (Mrs. Lovett) and Number 7 (Jack) in your house, both drunk out of their minds?

Pull up a chair…this oughta be good…

3. Number 8 (Graverobber) offered to fix the plumbing problems with your house?

Look at him and say, “Amber cleaned you out again, huh?”

4. Number 2 (Edward) showed up at school as your substitute teacher for the day?

I think my grades would increase….ten-fold…

5. You accidentally saw Number 10 (Anthony Hope) wearing nothing but a small, purple speedo?

HOT DOG!!

6. Number 3 (Mrs. Lovett) insisted on driving you around town to wherever you wanted to go for the entire day?

(hops in the car) sweet! Let’s get started!

7. Number 9 (Samara Morgan) killed Number 4 (Bellatrix) right in front of you?

Stand there, completely straight-faced and say, “I told her not to watch that tape, you know…”

Would you allow:

1. Number 6 (Tamaki) to redecorate your house for you, however they see fit?

Um…I dunno if I’d want a kitatsu table…

2. Number 1 (Sweeney Todd) to be your dentist and work in your mouth with a drill?

What? I stopped listening after “…Sweeney Todd be my dentist…”

3. Number 10 (Anthony) and Number 5 (Toby) to be left alone in your house or apartment unsupervised for an entire weekend?

Oh, god, no...I’d come home to find the place full of empty gin bottles!

4. Number 8 (Graverobber) to borrow some of your clothes and wear them in public?

I dunno…I don’t think red’s his color…

5. Number 2 (Edward Scissorhands) to try to fix your computer when it's messed up?

How about I just try to fix it myself?

6. Number 4 (Bellatrix) to set you up on a date with Number 9 (Samara)?

I think she’s just trying to revenge on Samara for killing her…not funny!

7. Number 1 (Sweeney) and Number 3 (Mrs. Lovett) to operate heavy machinery together?

I think Mrs. Lovett wouldn’t survive 5 minutes. She’d get too distracted by Sweeney…

Relationship Section:

1. Number 5 (Bellatrix) asks Number 2 (Edward Scissorhands) out on a date. Upon seeing this, what do you do or say?

Run, Edward…

2. Number 7 (Jack) asks you to a dance. Do you accept?

(looks around to make sure Sally isn’t there, and then nods enthusiastically)

3. Number 8 (Graverobber) and Number 9 (Samara) are fighting over you. What happens now?

Get weirded out by the ghost of an eight year old wanting me… then steal Graverobber’s zydrate when he’s too focused on the fight and run!!

4. Number 1 (Sweeney) tries to kiss you. What do you do?

Go in for it…full force…without my top…

5. Number 3 (Mrs. Lovett) confesses her secret love for Number 5 (Toby). What do you think of this?

CHILD PORNOGRAPHY!! MRS. LOVETT’S A PERVERT!!

6. Number 6 (Tamaki) is cheating on Number 7 (Jack) with Number 3 (Mrs. Lovett), and you find out about it. What do you do?

Nothing…Mrs. Lovett is a host club guest…and Tamaki is bi…

7. Number 4 (Bellatrix) proposes to you. Your reaction?

…she’s ending up in all the wrong places, isn’t she?

Random Nonsense:

1. What in the name of Holy Rabbit Dogs was Number 1 (Sweeney) doing outside in nothing but a small pink towel at 3 AM!?

Why question it?

2. What if Number 2 (Edward Scissorhands) tied Number 4 (Bellatrix) to a flagpole and threw shoes at him until she cried?

Haha, bitch…you got owned!

3. ...and then Number 8 (Graverobber) and Number 5 (Mrs. Lovett) danced around the table naked. Your reaction upon seeing this?

(runs to a phone, calls friends) Guys? You’ve gotta get your asses over here…I mean it…now…

4. Number 10 (Anthony) has just officially been given a Pyro License. What happens now?

Watch him burn down Turpin’s mansion after he rescues Johanna….what else?

5. Would YOU tell Number 9 (Samara) to "WOO! TAKE IT ALL OFF!"...?

She’s eight years old, you perv!!

6. What was Number 6 (Tamaki) in prison for?

Trying to get into Haruhi’s pants one time too many…

7. What if, suddenly, Number 4 (Bellatrix) smashed through the wall of your room totally naked, posed, and shouted "OHHHH YEEEEAAAAH!"...?

I repeat, she’s ending up in all the wrong places!!

What Would You Do If...

1.Number 1 (Sweeney) woke you up in the middle of the night?

Grab his arse and pull down his pants, and- hey, you asked…

2. Number 2 (Edward Scissorhands) asked you to go out with him?

Faint…revive and accept

3. Number 3 (Mrs. Lovett) walked into the bathroom while you're showering?

(Grabs shower curtain) hey Mrs. L…when you’d get here…?

4. Number 4 (Bellatrix) cooked you dinner?

Have the dog taste it…oh, wait…I don’t have a dog…

5. Number 5 (Toby) was lying next to you on the beach, sleeping?

Squeal! He’s so cute!

6. Number 8 (Graverobber) got into the hospital somehow?

Wouldn’t surprise me…I mean he IS a drug dealer…

7. Number 9 (Samara) made fun of your friends?

Oh like you have any better ones?? Or any at all, for that matter??

8. Number 10 (Anthony) ignored you all the time?

Dress up as Johanna…

What Would They Do Under The Following Circumstances?

1. Two serial killers are hunting you down. What will Number 1 (Sweeney) do?

Provide them with my location…

2. You're on a vacation with Number 2 (Edward Scissorhands) and you manage to break your leg. What does Number 2 do?

Has someone else help…he would help but he’d kinda hurt me even more…

3. It's your birthday. What will 3 (Mrs. Lovett) give you?

An extra special meat-pie…hey, Mrs. Lovett, I saw that annoying kid from my math class go in for a shave earlier…just wondering, what’s going on up there?

4. You're stuck in a house that's on fire. What does Number 4 (Bellatrix) do?

Laugh…

5. You're about to do something that'll make you feel extremely embarrassed. What will Number 5 (Toby) do?

Tell me its not a good idea…

6. You're about to marry Number 10 (Anthony). What's Number 6's (Tamaki) reaction?

“Dammit!! I can’t believe I’ve lost such a- hey look at that crying girl over there…the one with the yellow hair…”

7. You got dumped by someone. How will Number 7 (Jack) cheer you up?

A romantic walk through the pumpkin patch…

8. You're angry about it afterwards, how does Number 8 (Graverobber) calm you down?

Shooting me up with Zydrate…how else?

9. You compete in some tournament. How does Number 9 (Samara) support you?

She doesn’t…

10. You can't stop laughing. What will Number 10 (Anthony) do?

Tries to laugh as well…but fails…

Relationship Part

1. Number 1 (Sweeney) is all you've ever dreamed of.

What else is new?

2. Number 2 (Edward Scissorhands) tells you about his deeply hidden love for Number 9 (Samara). Your reaction?

Ed, she’s not your type in the least way…How? Well, for starters….she’s dead!

3. You're dating Number 3 (Mrs. Lovett) and introduce her to your parents. Will they get along?

Well my parents love the musical as well, and they know i'm bi, so they wont care that their daughter’s dating another woman.

4. Number 4 (Bellatrix) loves Number 9 (Samara) as well. What does that mean?

It means Bellatrix has suffered a recent head injury…

5. Number 6 (Tamaki) appears to be a player, he breaks many hearts. What do you do?

Where have you been for the past 26 episodes??

6. You had a haircut and Number 7 (Jack) can't stop looking at you. What goes on in your mind?

He wishes he had hair…

7. Number 8 (Graverobber) thinks he'll never get a girlfriend. What will you tell him?

(clears throat many times until he looks up at me)

8. Number 9 (Samara) is too shy to face you and confesses their love by sending you an e-mail. Now what?

If this is some trick to get me to watch the tape, I ain’t buying it…

Friendship Part

1. Could Number 1 (Sweeney) and Number 6 (Tamaki) be soul mates?

No…Sweeney’s mine…you hear me??

2. Would Number 2 (Edward Scissorhands) trust Number 5 (Toby)?

Who WOULDN’T trust Toby! And who WOULDN’T Edward trust?

3. Number 3 (Mrs. Lovett) wants to go shopping, will Number 7 (Jack) come along?

Nope.

4. Number 4 (Bellatrix) is bored and pokes Number 10 (Anthony). What happens after that?

I think she’s mistaken him for Gellert…

5. Number 5 (Toby) and Number 1 (Sweeney) are forced to go back to school together. What study will they pick?

For Sweeney, it would be How to Manage Your Anger; for Toby it would be…humph, basically everything…

6. If Number 6 (Tamaki) and Number 3 (Mrs. Lovett) cooked dinner, what would they make?

One hell of a blood-filled buffet…

7. Number 7 (Jack) and Number 9 (Samara) apply for a job. What job?

Obviously not Dermatology…

8. Number 8 (Graverobber) gives Number 5 (Toby) a haircut. Is that OK?

If he cuts the wig, I guess so…

9. Number 9 (Samara) sketches what Number 6's (Tamaki) perfect girlfriend should look like.

Oh boy…

10. Number 10 (Anthony) and Number 8 (Graverobber) are blushing while they talk. What is their conversation about?

I dunno but I’m scared to find out..

I’m Jewish so I MUST be frugal and have a big nose.

I’m bi so I MUST love everyone I see.

I’m Goth so I MUST hate the world and everyone in it.

I’m a gay-rights supporter, so I MUST be gay as well.

I’m different so I MUST be disgusting.

I like musical theatre, so I MUST be a drama queen.

I like talking with my teachers so I MUST be a teacher’s pet.

I shop at Hot Topic, so I MUST be Emo.

I wear black, so I MUST cut myself.

I love to read so I MUST be a loner

i don't like to be in a big group, so i MUST be anti-social.
i have a different sense of humor, so i MUST be crazy.
i tell people off, so i MUST be an over controlling bitch.
My hair gets greasy a lot, so i MUST have no hygiene skills.
I’m defensive, so i MUST be over controlling and a bitch.
I’m a nudist, so i MUST want everyone to see my boobs.
I read comics, so i MUST be a loser.
I hang out with a former prostitute so i MUST be a whore myself.
I’m Texan so i MUST ride a horse
I’m a cross dresser, so i MUST be homosexual.
I draw anime so i MUST be a freak.
I am a fan girl so i MUST be a crazy, obsessed stalker.
I watch porn so i MUST be perverted.
I’m an only child so i MUST be spoiled.
I’m intelligent so i MUST be weak
i am American so i MUST be obese, loud-mouthed and arrogant.
I’m welsh so i MUST love sheep
I’m Scottish so i MUST have ginger hair and wear a skirt (it's actually called a kilt)
I’m a young writer, so i MUST be emo.
I’m Canadian, so i MUST talk with a funny accent.
I’m a guy, so i MUST ditch my pregnant girlfriend.
I’m Canadian, so i MUST love hockey and beavers.
I’m disabled, so i MUST be on welfare.
I’m a feminist, so i MUST have a problem with sexuality and i want to castrate every man on the earth.
I’m a teenager, so i MUST have a stereotype.
I wear a big sunhat when i go outside, so i MUST be stupid.
I like blood, so i MUST be a vampire.
I’m an albino, so i MUST be an evil person with mental abilities and is a murderer! (What?)
I’m English, so i MUST speak with either a cockney or a posh accent, love tea and cricket, and have bad teeth.
I’m white, so i MUST be responsible for everything going wrong on the planet: past, present, and future.
i don't like yaoi or yuri, so i MUST be a homophobe
I’m not the most popular person in school, so i MUST be a loser
i care about the environment...i MUST be a tree hugging hippy.
I have a fan character, so i MUST be an annoying mary-sue.
i chat; i MUST be having cyber sex.
I’m pagan so i MUST sacrifice babies and drink the blood of virgins
I’m pagan so i MUST worship Satan
I’m conservative, so i MUST be against abortion
I’m Swedish so i MUST be a tall blond blue-eyed lesbian. (well you got the blond blue eyed part right)
I’m a lesbian so i MUST want to get with every single girl that i see.
i like cartoons, so i MUST be irresponsible.
i like reading, so i MUST be a loner.
i have my own spiritual ideology; therefore i MUST be wrong or misguided.
i am wiccan, so i MUST be a Satanist.
i disagree with my government, so i MUST be a terrorist.
I’m a person, so i MUST be labeled
i don't curse, so i MUST be an outcast
i like games, anime and comics, so i MUST be childish
I’m Swedish, therefore i MUST be white.
i spot grammatical errors, so i MUST be a pedantic bastard.
I’m gothic, so i MUST be mean.
I’m strong so i MUST be stupid.
I’m Australian so i MUST hunt crocodiles and talk to kangaroo’s
i go to renfaires, so i MUST talk weird, be a loser, and not be up with the times
I’m gay so I’m after every straight guy around.
i don’t want a boyfriend so i MUST be lesbian.
I’m not Christian so i MUST just need converting
i love marching band, so i MUST be a friendless freak.
i drink and smoke, so i MUST have no life.
i am friends with a cutter, so i MUST be a cutter too.
i cry easily, so i MUST be a wimp.
i can't help pointing out mistakes so i MUST be an over-controlling perfectionist
I’m a perfectionist so i MUST check everything ten times, then burst into tears at one mistake
i don’t like to talk about my personal life so i MUST be having problems
i like fire so i MUST be an arsonist.
i play video games so i MUST be a loser