Updates!

Interesting updates are elusive.

Now behold the utmost necessities of a true FanFiction, er, page (I momentarily forgot how to spell profile)...

The Boring Stuffs...

Name(s):

Winter, various shortened versions of Winter, Demyx, various shortened versions of Demyx, Cloud/Hayner (for serious), Hey You!, Jailbait, Little One, Blondie, Portable Jukebox, Lollipop, Ducky, Fish, the list is endless.

Age:

I'm fucking ancient. Actually, no, I'm still in highschool, you don't get called ancient until you go back to your original highschool and work as a janitor there for 24.5 years.

Gender:

Should I mention that I sadly go to an all girls school, or are you fine and dandy not knowing this one?

Likes/Hobbies:

Lemme see... Quoting stuff, Drawing (when I can), Writing, Spending time out with mates, Goofing off (I'm best at this one), Cosplaying, Humor that isn't stupid, Music, The Ansem Retorts, Sweet but not sugary tea (with no milk), All my favourite games, anime, what-have-you that I can't be bothered listing out, And lotsa other stuff I can't think of right now.

Dislikes/Peeves:

Extremists (the people who shun homosexuals, or men, or people of other races/religions), Horror/Thriller/Lame movies, (c)rap and NeoDisney (Jonas Bros, Miley Cyrus, those sortsa people) music, Macs, Kumora (sweet potato) and some other foods (I'm picky about food), The Stepdad, Being insulted and some other stuff

Stuff for you guys to check out around the World Wide Web:

http://www.fanfiction.net/~roxashasastick (ya already there sweetheart)

http://roxas-has-a-stick.deviantart.com/ (Yeeeeeah!)

http://www.ansemretort.org/ansemretort/index.html?comic=1 (I don't have any connections to the creators other than my faithful viewingness, but have a looksee regardless)

Oookay, now that the introductions are over and done with, this next bit is a hobbie of mine (like how collecting stamps is to other people):

The Quotes...

As you can guess, I lurv these things, keep rechecking this part, as I update often, and almost never do I tack them on the ends, so go throughout the whole thing again!

"When life gives you lemons, you should throw them back at life and say 'I don't want your damn lemons!'" -Some random

"Well, that was strangely involuntary" -Another random

"Imagine this: Say you walked up to your parents, and told them you wet the bed while having homosexual sex in their bedroom with a dead prostitute while a monkey smoking crack watched." -Demyx describing an awkward silence Part 1 (from- Candied)

"Monkey-raping-in-your-kitchen-sink awkward silence" -Demyx describing an awkward silence Part 2 (from- Candied)

Daddy-I-ate-your-power-tools-and-rammed-your-paper-weight-up-kittie's-ass awkward silence" -Demyx describing an awkward silence Part 3 (from- Candied)

"I reject your reality and substitute my own." -Jamie from Mythbusters

"Hmmm... an intelligent gaurd... didn't see that one coming." -Titan AE

"This is a man's job, so why the fuck am I here again?" -Me as Demyx

"Stop cloning yourself and fight me like a goddamn man!" -Magda as a double visioned drunk

"Cry me a river, build me a bridge, get over it, and I'll set fire to it when you are halfway across," -Axel (from- ?)

"Your first witness turned on you, your second was a psycho, and your third just ran out of the courtroom calling you 'meanieface'." -Larxene (from- ladychimera)

"Homophobia is sooooo GAY!" -A random badge I found

"Look at all the space on her side of the bed. You could fit a giant penguin over there. That'd be weird though" -Chandler Bing (from- Friends)

"Random: 'I like your hair' Me: 'Thank you, I grow it myself'" -Me and random

"You're moving to Australia? That's like, a whole CITY away!" -Me when my bestfriend first told me she was moving, I ruined a good crying session

"Ma'am, what if I promised you I'd get my homework in as soon as I can find someone to copy it off of?" -Me excusing myself from the wrath of my Social Studies teacher

"I feel like the floor of a taxi cab." -Me after I woke up the day after Wellygeddon (I inadvertently stole this from Ghostbusters, small world)

"Luke... I am your second uncle, twice removed," -Some dude (from- Whos Line Is It Anyway?)

"I see, I saw, I concured! And... I just spelt that wrong." -Magda (on Msn)

“Do you know from experience that four adult men can fit easily on your bed?”-Angeal talking to Genesis (from- Dysnomia)

"First... I whip it out! Then... I thrust it, with great force! Every angle... it penetrates! Until... with great strength... I RAM it in! And in the end, we're all... satisfied." -Dante not talking about sex (from- Devil May Cry 4)

"When you see someone wearing a black organization cloak and they’re running from an army of clowns well… it has to be you." -Zexion to Demyx (from- Shadoom)

"Tell the truth and run." -Me to my bestfriend when we broke a window at school

"'Well why do you love your girlfriend… that’s why I love you' 'You love me cuz I have big boobs?' 'NO!'" -Zexion (underline) and Demyx (from- Affliction6)

"'I will suck you dry' pause 'Damn. Any other time, a chick telling me that would be a good thing'" -Evil Vampire Alice and Dante (from- Devil May Cry 3 -manga-)

"Apparently I've just been killed by 'A 12 Inch Cock', lucky me..." -Me playing an online shooting game against someone called 'A 12 Inch Cock'

"Sora gave him a look, a look that said ‘you-need-to-crawl-out-from-under-that-rock-and-watch-a-goddamn-movie-every-once-in-a-while’. It was a very wordy look" -Sora looking at Vamp!Riku (from- MissWasabiLemon)

"In case you forgot, Naminé, our parents disowned me. Do you remember why? Because mom's X chromosone and dad's Y chromosone equals a great big flaming fruit!" -Demyx (from- Candied)

"Why couldn’t Axel understand that he just wanted to sulk in peace? Maybe in a dark alley at night while dogs barked and rain soaked his clothes… then he would look into a puddle and see himself for what he really is… damn sexy. Ohhh yeah." -Roxas having a shitty day (from- slewy)

"Sora/Roxas... The ultimate masturbation" -Me looking at an extremely cute SoRoku picture

"If you haven't noticed ma'am, either I am procrastinating or I am sleeping, so no, the homework is not done" -Me talking to Social Studies teacher

"Yeah, coz' the guy looks so tough and hardcore in his cute wooly jumper" -Me in English when the teacher explained visual images

"Did anyone else see a rouge tomato go past just now, or am I that crazy" -Me to my squad when playing an online shooting game in a desert setting (rouge tomato from- FF12)

"I like the way you move!" -Me when asked to say a compliment to someone in health class

"I'm sorry Demmy, but I just can't take you seriously when you have a cucumber in your mouth" -Magda when I was eating a cucumber and angry at all of her innuendo about it

"Welcome to fight club, the suicidenation of a reality know as your life" -Fight club, duh

"Where can I buy a phone?" -Vincent from Final Fantasy AC

"Listen... you're a loon. I get that. Hell, one time I got so wasted I proposed to a mop. So I'm not one to judge. That said, nutty or not, I'll feng shui this room with your diseased brains if you don't give me the girl" -Dante (from- Devil may Cry 3 -the manga-)

"What did they want out of life? Sephiroth wanted to die in battle. Cloud wanted a pool" -Random preyaoi scene (from- sephcounttheways)

"In fact, I might even leave! I might start my own Organization! I might have someone strangle Zexion! WHO KNOWS WHAT I'LL DO! I'M A NOBODY ON THE EDGE NOW!" -Axel Cosplayer (from- KellyJane)

"The scenarios I had gone over in my mind either included a very angry Demyx, a non-existent Demyx, or a passed out on the sofa and possibly naked Demyx. When Axel and I rounded the corner into the living room I discovered that it was Demyx number two: non-existent Demyx." -Roxas the day after a party that Demyx was supposed to drive him home from (by- Naive-Symphony)

"She decided that Demyx looked like a jazz singer, Riku looked like a spy, Zexion looked like a mafia man, and Sora looked like Sora wearing a suit" -Sora's mom talking about everyone in their prom tux's (by- paintthesilence)

"This one girl once came up to me after I said 'does anyone know what they wanna be when they grow up', grabbed onto my pants, looked up at me and said 'I wanna be a firefighter on the moon!'... I replied 'you're parents do drugs!'" -Ryan from Amped4Life, funny dude

"SHAME ON YOU!" -Some random on a chatroom who kept saying that for no reason

"I'm Bulimic... but I also have Alsymus so I keep forgetting to throw up" -Someone at my mums work

"Time Line? Time isn't made out of lines! It is made out of circles! That is why clocks are round" -Demyx from Red vs. Blue

"It’s like having a pet, only it’s an old smelly guy in a really really really fugly coat" -Hayner talkning about hobo!Luxord (by- Cloverfrommars)

"I know how to overcome prank calls, next time someone calls you to say 'Have you checked on the children?', tell them 'I killed them, bitch!'" -Me referencing Dane Cook

"You know the thing that bounded after you when the words Sic em were said...? Yes that was Saix" -Sora's inner monologue (from- Kitty-Cat-Kauri)

"Well I've also got a jar of dirt, and I'll be damned if there is no heart in it!" -Me again playing with a bottle of sand

"Okay... I feel like a Coca-Cola ad" -Me when I got hit in the head, I was 'seeing stars'

"You know what you are? You're like Sudoku. You're too complicated. You're black and white. Everybody pronounces your name wrong. And every time I feel like I've finally solved you, I realize that I've screwed it up beyond imagination. God, I love puzzles."- Summary for Hack Value (by- Souvenir)

"I've always wondered what was in the Blue Pill, probly Viagra and nitroglycerin..." -Me at the end of a Futurama marathon

"Barrel Rolls: The Answer to all of lifes serious Questions" -Another tee-shirt, I think I spend more time looking at quotes on shirts than doing homework...

"They should just call you 'Itsnotrapeitssurprisesex' with the way you kill these guys!" -Me talking to a guy online who rocked at shooting games

"listening to One Winged Angel actually made the experience more fun!" -Me after reading a graphic SephRi almost rape fic with said song playing in the background

"Winter, Winter, Winter -cue head shaking... either you have watched Red Dwarf and are just being gifted but bored like normal, or you really don't know the answer to any of these questions" -English teacher when she found every question in my test was answered with 'I'm a fish', I really was copying Red Dwarf

"I know they were just kids... but man we beat the fuck out of them!" -Me after beating the eleven year olds at team tatics

"You know what happens when a politician takes Viagra? He gets taller!" -Uncle Jesse from Dukes Of Hazzard

"I have to admit I agree with Xigbar when he wonders why they call it tourist season when we can’t shoot them?" -Roxas being himself (by- MidnightAria)

"They need to change the name of that show from Desperate Houswives to Ungrateful Bitches" -Chris Rock

"The only thing worse than chopchop chicken is being Tubgirl'd a second time!" -Some random, man that brought back bad memories...

"My Chemical Romance: satisfying gay emo cock fantasies for far too fucking long" -Funny tee-shirt I once saw

"Dilly Dally Shilly Shally: An Expression used to chastize someone who is wasting time, focusing on unimportant things, procrastinating, or otherwise being an emo blond-haired sissy boy" -Definition from Urban Dictionary

"Murphy's Law loves you" -Online friend after hearing about my shitty day

"I invoke rule 34 on the Rescue Rangers. What have I done" -Whoever it was that first said this

"Full View if you don't want me to come murder your first born child. And if you're first born child has already been murdered, then I will settle for popping your tires." -Some guy on DA who makes me laugh

"One day, your prince will come. Mine? Oh, he just took a wrong turn, got lost, and is too stubborn to ask for directions." -Random at a convention when I asked if they knew where Zume was...

"If you add a 'b' to the end of Reno and flip it backwards... you get Boner" -...Someone

“If I weren’t okay, you would be far too late by now to do anything. Congratulations, I’m dead. Good night.” -Rufus ShinRa being asked by his secretary if he was okay, she's asking through a speaker...

"Don't knock on death's door. Ring the bell and run - he hates that." -Me talking to someone who was going to do something utterly stupid (I quoted from somewhere)

"Dude, you are not a window... you're a door." -Me when my cousin stood in between me and the TV

"That, my children, is called a wall. But beware, the wall is solid. Yes, be afraid! Be very afraid, for we cannot walk through it! Believe me children, for I have attempted this many times before." -Friend when we were at the Museum trying to act like a tour guide

"Raunchy porn for Christmas? The birthday of the Lord and Savior? Was he really becoming this trashy? No, he wasn’t... He’d give it to Sephiroth on New Year’s." -Cloud buying Christmas presents and finding porn of people pretending to be Sephiroth (by- sephcounttheways)

"I, Axel Sinclair, am a flaming homosexual! The thought of a naked guy totally turns me on, girls suck. Dick is great, boobs are not. You getting what I’m saying here?" -Axel coming out to his homophobic, asshole of a dad (by- VampyreQueen24)

"Let’s just blame it on termites, shall we?" -Rufus after he and Reno break a bed at an inn (by- Xenobia)

"First Zell, now him. Jeeze, is there a sign around my neak saying 'Chocobo heads welcome'?" -Leon whining about Cloud's hair for some reason (by- 330INSANITY)

"He was spreading his awesome like peanut butter on toasty bread" -Cloud tranistioning from meek and shy to cool and proud... in his bathroom (by- sephcounttheways)

“Why? Am I too much of a bad boy for your parents? I don’t have to wear black, you know. I could easily change my clothes. Just because I’m in touch with my dark side doesn’t mean I rely on it completely for fashion sense.” -Riku trying to con Sora into letting him see his hometown (by- ?)

"Let go. If you don't, I'm either going to kick your ass or rape you. Either way, you'll end up on the floor." -Cloud when Leon, his ex, tries to get him to stay (by- Lady Karai)

"You don't even have the common courtesy to threaten me with a proper firearm." -Casey when Chuck accidentally uses a tranquiliser instead of a gun as a weapon

"What you talkin' 'bout, Willis?" -Classic

"In Kingdom Hearts some queer assholes played a cruel prank by casting Lance Bass as Sephiroth" -Random dude ranting about Sephiroth

"What was the word again? Ah yes. Prison bitch." -whitedog1 talking about Light Yagami...

"Before settling on Naked Snake as Big Boss's alias, Konami toyed with several possibilities including Au Naturel Banguette, Bare-Skinned Boa, Raw Sausages, Peeled Chipolata, Buff Banana, Starkers Salami, Unclad Rod, Leafless Lizard and Exposed Penis" -Magazine making fun of Naked Snake from Metal Gear Solid 3's name...

"Hate Every Bone In Your Body Except For Mine" -42 in my list of funny song titles (by-?)

"I Gave Her My Heart And A Diamond And She Clubbed Me With A Spade" -Another funny song title (by-?)

"Did you need something? A kiss? A sensual massage? Something from a high shelf?" -Reno when Roxas talks to him randomly (by- Nijuuni)

"They have robots on them!" -Demyx describing his underwear in the Zemyx AMV 'Wow, Zexion can get sexual too'

"He wanted that kid way more than he favored his health. His health lost out a lot lately, and Axel didn’t want his health getting its hopes up." Axel being slightly not right in the head (by- Oibara)

"You think when Edward did it with Bella, he gave her an STG?" -Me secretly insulting a Twilight fan, STG= Sexually Transmitted Glitter - glitter that rubs on to you during any intimate contact with your partner.

"Let’s just say we were reading about sugar." -Zexion's way of telling innocent Namine that he and Demyx were making out in a library (by- Jetzelda)

"He's gonna be the most loved man in jail... buuuuuut not in the way that sounded." -The only line I caught on some random TV program before I changed the channel

"Blasphemy: a ticket to hell has never been funnier" -That picture with the Jesus on the cross, then three guys next to it spelling out the letters M, C and A with their arms...

"Guys... what the fuck did you do?" -A response to this picture of a nuclear explosion on the internet

"There are only two rules in TV. Don't swear and don't whip it out. It's not rocket science!" -Krusty the Klown when Kent Brockman swears on TV

"OP should kill OTHER people. Killing yourself means you have either bad psychological issues or bad aim." -Random guy on internet trying to convince other random guy not to commit suicide, I think...

"Interdum feror cupidine partium magnarum Europae vincendarum" -Latin for: Sometimes I get this urge to conquer large parts of Europe.

"How can you trust a man who wears both a belt and suspenders? The man can't even trust his own pants." -I don't know where this came from...

"Don't use the word 'gay' unless it's an acronym for 'Got Aids Yet'" -Republican politician Bob Dornan

"Life's a bitch and then you die. So fuck the world and lets get high!" -A tee shirt that had a picture of a kite on it...

"A key that opens multiple locks is called a Master Key. However, a lock that can be opened by multiple keys is called a lousy lock." -Someone using a metaphor to explain guys that sleep around are praised by others, whereas girls that sleeps around is a slut

"Christmas. What a superficial holiday. Roxas used to say the only reason Axel didn’t celebrate it was because he didn’t see why Christ got a holiday and Axel didn’t. In a way, that was true." -Another fanfic (by- Mad-TopHat-Ter)

"Well no one's ever seen an ape turn into a human" -Someone in my Bio class after the teacher said 'no one's ever seen God' as proof of evolution

"As it turned out, 'like, a block away' was Axel-speak for: I have no idea where the fuck this restaurant is." -Axel taking Roxas to a sushi resturant that he went to one time with Demyx (by- Lelek)

"Meanwhile on the National Geographic Channel." -A scene breaker in a SephCloud fic (by- OriginalBotticella)

"The name's Buck. Short for Buckminster. Long for Buh." -Buck from Ice Age 3

"Axel, wearing pants, stepped out of the door" -I accidentally skipped a paragraph the first time reading and missed the joke about Axel's pants before this line... (by- Versace Frolic)

"I’m not late, I’m so fast I’m early. Got it memorized!” -An introduction to Axel. He rushes in late to his lesson yelling this (by-?)

"My hovercraft is full of eels" -From a book of useful phrases to know in Japanese

"If we had a military, we'd totally fuck you up..." -New Zealanders on the internet...

"Mature content filter because I didn't put any clothes on the camera." -Person on DA who took a photo of their broken camera and matured it for whatever reason

"Inch by inch, life's a cinch.Yard by yard, life is hard." -Unknown person

"Yeah! We can hold hands on the way there, and I’ll introduce you to all my friends, and we’ll eat lunch together. And when we get home, we’ll camp out in the living room, and watch movies and make smores, and when you fall asleep I will murder you for bothering me all day!" -Pissant little Roxas (by- rae2009)

If anyone owns one of these quotes and doesn't want it here, just tell me and I'll take it off without a fuss, Okay?

And now for a few long ones..

Judge: This court finds Zexion Doreone... not guilty!

Pheonix Wright: OBJECTION!

Axel: GO FUCK YOURSELF!

Judge: Objection over-ruled... 'go fuck yourself' sustained. -Ansem Retorts (pg-?)

ooooooooooooooOOoooooooooooooo

(Zexion is Governer)

Zexion: -to Namine- So I sold New Mexico to Spain. In return, we get their sexy Latino names.

Zexion: By the way, my name is now Guillermo del Zexiero lo Marquis.

Namine: You jerk! You can't just go selling territory at your- ooh!

Namine: Ooh... ooh that is sexy

Zexion: I know! I am so getting laid with this new name! -Ansem Retorts (pg- 478)

ooooooooooooooOOoooooooooooooo

(Looking for Blockbuster...)

Axel: Namine, don't you have one of those handheld GPS things?

Namine: Well... yea, but it's stuck on Yoda setting. I can't understand it's instructions

GPS: left turn meter 300 must turn you. Right turn lead to confusion, confusion lead to anger, anger lead to drive-by

Axel: Just give me the damn thing, I'll figure it out.

Namine: Wait, no! Just hold on-

GPS: -flashes-

GPS: 'mga tnage beefg. Leksakg, Yo Adrian, 'anaig bofa.

Namine: Way to go Axel, now it's on Sylvester Stallone. Unless you got a degree in ancient languages and code breaking, this thing's f-king useless. -Ansem Retorts (pg-250-251)

ooooooooooooooOOoooooooooooooo

(FYI... in the following one, Zexion is the government and Axel's crime buddy, Axel is a serial killer and Zexion's -political- cabinet, they are both on a plane celebrating Axel's bachelor party)

Axel: -on phone with Zexion- Mr. Governor, I have taken 65 plane passengers hostage

Zexion: I will not negotiate with terrorists

Axel: I guess I'll have to convince you we mean business- Psst Zex, go kill a hostage

Zexion: -covered in blood- Hmmm, so you're willing to kill hostages. Let me talk with my cabinet

Zexion: -turns to Axel next to him- Axel, a terrorist is holding a plane hostage.

Axel: I say you give in to all of his demands

Zexion: -turns back to phone- I am willing to negotiate

Axel: The time for negotiations has long since ended -Ansem Retorts (pg-430-431)

ooooooooooooooOOoooooooooooooo

Axel: Aerith got drunk enough to forget that she's getting married or that she has standards. Some guy picked her up at the bar. This isn't anyone's fault and we're going to confront the issue calmly and maturely

Darth Maul: And by calmly and maturely you mean...

Axel: We're crashing a fucking plane through his house! -Ansem Retorts (pg-436)

ooooooooooooooOOoooooooooooooo

Namine: So what do you promise not to do?

Axel+Zexion: We promise not to hijack and/or crash the plane.

Aerith: ...I promise not to attack the pilot if the movie is "The Devil Wears Prada."

Axel: I don't know why you regret that. That was the best honeymoon ever. -Ansem Retorts (pg- 471)

ooooooooooooooOOoooooooooooooo

(Zexion is running for governor and is being asked questions by reporters)

Random: How can law be manipulated so as to census immigrants from the north?

Riku: -backstage to Marluxia- Tell Zexion to say 'By supplying constitutional mandates, supply can be monitored'.

Marluxia: -to Aerith- 'By supertastic confetti monsters, Mao Ze Dong can get a makeover.' Pass it on

Zexion: -on stage- In Soviet Canada, maple syrups you! Eh? -Ansem Retorts (pg-260)

ooooooooooooooOOoooooooooooooo

(Axel trying to make light on the fact that reality TV shows are being destroyed by stuff lately and they could be next)

Axel: We've faced worse than this. Remember when Disney Land got destroyed?

Marluxia: Larxene did that.

Axel: Well what about that plane that got hijacked?

Marluxia: You hijacked that plane.

Axel: Okay, but there was that corrupt government.

Marluxia: That was, and still is Zexion

Axel: Wow, we're assholes! -Ansem Retorts (pg- ?)

ooooooooooooooOOoooooooooooooo

(Due to their lives being threatened, everyone is hiding out in Greece)

Hercules: Hello, my name is Hercules. I'll be your tour guide through Greece.

Axel: And what makes you Greek enough? I did request Kratos to be our guide.

Hercules: I'm half-centaur

Hercules: I have the upper body of a centaur, and the lower body of a man.

Axel: ... Are you retarded? -Ansem Retorts (pg- 480)

ooooooooooooooOOoooooooooooooo

Maul: -to Sora- You're a retarded-

Ansem: Maul, that's not really appropriate.

Ansem: The proper term is differently-capable-American

Maul: Bull shit! He's a Goddam retard! I'll prove it!

Maul: -to Sora- Sora, go do something only a retard would do.

Sora: OK!

Sora: -at movie ticket booth- One ticket for Twilight please! -Ansem Retorts (pg- 482)

ooooooooooooooOOoooooooooooooo

(Half of them are wherever the feck they are right now)

Dude: 'G' to 'double-O' to the 'D' mornin'.

Aerith: You seem less... feral today.

Dude: Bitch be zetta trippin'.

Axel: Wait, I know you. You're Sho Catoa.

Axel: You're that lame rapper who's always singing songs about Math.

Dude: I say 'Y' you say '=mx+b'.

Dude: Y

Randoms offscreen: =mx+b

Dude: I remember you! You da guy throwin' hand grenades during a concert.

Axel: -to Aerith- I was proving a point.

Aerith: And what point could that possibly be?

Axel: Numbers are gay. -Ansem Retorts (pg- 490)

More quotes shall be added whenever I feel up to it

If you are still reading this, WOW you have as much of a life as I do, good job.

The Power Of DEMYX Compels You...