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Never in a million years
Never in a million years
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Focus: Books Twilight, Since: 06-23-07
Things that would never happen, but are so funny!
The Wild and Wacky Adventures of Edward in PE!
by LindaRoo reviews
Hilarity ensues when Edward comes back at the end of New Moon and he and Alice get Mrs. Cope to change their schedules to put them in Bella's gym class. How can they appear human when their superhuman athletic aptitudes keep getting in the way?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Fantasy - Chapters: 12 - Words: 74,371 - Reviews: 1979 - Favs: 2,226 - Follows: 1,680 - Updated: 3/9/2009 - Published: 2/27/2007
Cullenary Educaton: Forks Sex Ed
by MarcyJ reviews
Set at the End of Bella's Junior Year. Hilarity ensues when the Forks Gang is forced to endure Sex Education class with Coach Clapp. Chapter 1 is Jasper POV, and each subsequent chapter is from the perspective of a different character.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 6 - Words: 22,726 - Reviews: 2127 - Favs: 3,539 - Follows: 1,650 - Updated: 8/28/2009 - Published: 4/2/2007
Bella's Adventures in Disneyland
by IRead2DamnMuch reviews
Join the entire Cullen family, plus Bella, as they make their way through Disneyland and California Adventures on Bella's first time to Disneyland. Add a dash of Edward being his brooding self and one liners from a sleepy human and you have one hot mess.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 2 - Words: 2,536 - Reviews: 12 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 12 - Updated: 5/16/2010 - Published: 3/5/2010 - Bella, Edward
Money, Sex, Money, Cat
by Signature.Hot.Chocolate reviews
Just what were those other people in the restaurant thinking? BellaEdward. One-shot.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 1 - Words: 994 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 98 - Follows: 19 - Published: 1/19/2009 - Bella, Edward - Complete
Education of our Peers
by Emmeline Rose reviews
The Cullen family, including Bella, have been nominated to become student teachers. When Jasper teaches History and Edward is the school Phsycologist, all hell breaks loose. What will happen when vampires take over the school?
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 7 - Words: 14,184 - Reviews: 132 - Favs: 85 - Follows: 121 - Updated: 8/31/2008 - Published: 8/18/2008
Emmett Tries to Crack an Egg
by Glitterized reviews
Emmett decides to make Bella lunch, the only problem is that he cannot crack the egg.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 734 - Reviews: 17 - Favs: 24 - Follows: 3 - Published: 7/3/2008 - Complete
by Cupid's Jinx reviews
Emmett is entrusted to take care of Bella whilst Edward, Alice, Jasper and Rosalie are out hunting. Esme and Carlisle are on one of their many honeymoons. You know what this spells...T-R-O-U-B-L-E! ONESHOT
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 1,546 - Reviews: 30 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 7 - Published: 6/30/2008 - Complete
Playing Dirty is mean
by JaceDamian23 reviews
Summary: Bella and Emmett have a bet going on, and Bella plays dirty to win, but you have to play dirty to win sometimes. One shot, may write more if people like this story
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,918 - Reviews: 14 - Favs: 18 - Follows: 4 - Published: 6/23/2008 - Complete
The DOOR IN A POOL!
by OfFiCiAl.TwIlIgHtEr reviews
Ok. So... really funny. I hope. Bella is a vampire. Edward knocked a door in a pool. Just read. Kind of stupid also...
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 1,589 - Reviews: 5 - Favs: 4 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 6/26/2008 - Published: 10/28/2007
A Day In The Life Of Emmett Cullen
by Chibidarknekoangel reviews
The fun awsome life...death thingy of Emmett Cullen. I suck at summaries. 3rd chapter is now up please, please read! Emmett get's himself in BIG trouble.Reveiw! i love reading them
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,816 - Reviews: 23 - Favs: 11 - Follows: 13 - Updated: 7/28/2007 - Published: 7/25/2007
Emmett's Perfect Day
by xXxbailey925xXx reviews
What do you get when edwardluver925 and Wasper Jithlock Cowrite a story? MAYHEM! What does Emmett do when he is alone? What if the Cullen's had a secret that Bella didn't know about? FUNNY! WE DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT! Stephenie Meyer DOES!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 6 - Words: 9,399 - Reviews: 162 - Favs: 70 - Follows: 73 - Updated: 3/14/2009 - Published: 7/19/2007 - Emmett, Bella
The Cullen Name Change
by Kirbiness reviews
What would happen if the Cullen's had to change their names for legal purposes? Who choose them? Emmett of course! Read and PM me with suggestions for their new names!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 1 - Words: 2,390 - Reviews: 6 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 16 - Published: 7/15/2007
A Day With Emmett Cullen
by Alex-Marie-1992 reviews
Emmett/Bella bonding. permanent hiatus and being taken over by frosty1974
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Romance - Chapters: 5 - Words: 1,458 - Reviews: 36 - Favs: 20 - Follows: 23 - Updated: 9/30/2009 - Published: 7/15/2007
by petuniagirl16 reviews
What if Alice stumbled across a certain fan fiction website? Final Chapter up!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 8 - Words: 12,040 - Reviews: 104 - Favs: 75 - Follows: 41 - Updated: 7/20/2007 - Published: 7/14/2007 - Complete
That's How We Roll
by Lella Reincarnated reviews
Alice, Edward, Bella, and Jasper steal a plane and have some insane fun. Where will the plane land? You decide.
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Adventure - Chapters: 4 - Words: 10,101 - Reviews: 13 - Favs: 10 - Follows: 15 - Updated: 1/21/2008 - Published: 7/13/2007
Don't mess with Edward! Or Bella!
by Endless Dawn reviews
This is what you get when you mix me, a lot of sugarchocolate bars, and lots of free time, and writer's block on my other stores. You get….RANDOMNESS! Like this… Oneshot.
Twilight - Rated: K+ - English - Humor/Parody - Chapters: 1 - Words: 258 - Reviews: 18 - Favs: 8 - Follows: 3 - Published: 7/1/2007 - Complete
Edward is Pregnant
by LittleShortGirlFromOuterSpace reviews
Alice and Jasper play a little prank on Edward. In Jasper's Idea and POV! What is this prank? And why did Edward's Pants get ripped? What Type of undes does Edward wear? Does Edward get his playback with Bella's help? Love ya! DONE!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor/Drama - Chapters: 5 - Words: 5,655 - Reviews: 62 - Favs: 53 - Follows: 17 - Updated: 7/11/2007 - Published: 6/30/2007 - Complete
Attack of the Killer Bunnies
by twilightnite reviews
Jasper goes hunting and when vampire bunnies appear, everyone blames him. But it is really him? R&R! Completed!
Twilight - Rated: T - English - Humor - Chapters: 10 - Words: 4,168 - Reviews: 54 - Favs: 23 - Follows: 18 - Updated: 9/9/2007 - Published: 6/23/2007 - Complete