Reviews for The Ambiguous Artifice |
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kuroshiragami0 chapter 16 . 10/29 Amazing novel project someday |
NCC1701D USS Enterprise chapter 12 . 9/29 it does seem she has given the whole time trying to control her magic a minimal effort and just focussed on anything else, why be strong when i can give up trying, cower and obsess over my precious potions. Power to create real change and control reality in ways others can only dream of... or mix a bunch of disgusting things together in a pot every day for the rest of your life...hmm choices choices |
NCC1701D USS Enterprise chapter 1 . 9/27 I love your work, even if you abandoned it I will not ;D |
Fayhem chapter 8 . 8/4 I can only hope Rigel/Harry (seriously, I never know how to refer to her... which I guess is in the spirit of the fic, lol) failed to put together that Pettigrew being immersed in some kind of meditation when she burst in and the entire event subsiding *immediately* upon him being disrupted is suspicious as fuck because of the extreme stress and chaos in the moment and she'll be piecing it together in her thoughts later. Otherwise I'll have to diagnose her as terminally unsuspecting for a Slytherin. |
Fayhem chapter 7 . 8/4 I feel like the subject of people being able to guess things is one of those topics where perceptions tend to systematically differ between readers and writers. From a reader's perspective (at least IMO), readers being able to guess developments from the clues you put in the text doesn't necessarily mean you've done a bad job; usually it's the opposite, in fact. It's infinitely preferable to be able to guess something coming up because it was actually well-grounded in the text than to have it come out of nowhere because the writer wanted to contrive a surprise. |
alae sheziss chapter 15 . 6/2 The third book is simply amazing and perfect 3 |
Ashera fanfics chapter 16 . 5/25 In the future you might want to cut your chapters in 8k words pieces in order to make them more digestible. If you wish to write publishable books, this kind of excessive chapter length will most likely get your manuscripts instantly rejected before the publisher reads a single line, just looking at the book size and the number of chapters. The story is good but the pacing suffers from your 30-40k words a chapter, it's undeniable. You might also want to shorten your scenes and make them more believable by not dragging them forever. One dialog over 1 or 2 topics rarely lasts more than 2 pages in a book unless it's a self contained story told by the character(s) or it's a debate with lots of participants and/or material to debate about. And 2 pages of a Word file are 1000 words long on average, not 5000. Most dialogs, especially when the characters are in dire situations like a kidnapping, don't leave the involved characters with the clarity of mind to speak eloquently and make fully reasoned arguments like they've been writing an entire essay in their mind. Your characters tend to always speak the same, no matter if they're discussing an essay or trying to survive a deadly confrontation. Adrenaline doesn't seem to affect them at all and your main character seems way too distant from what's happening to them, like their body and mind are completely disconnected even in the middle of a fight. |
Lorien's Lady chapter 16 . 5/20 I just have no words for how good this series is. Kudos again! |
Dot1warner chapter 13 . 2/25 Love this series. Reading it again! |
lirel.tamora chapter 13 . 12/24/2023 Dang first words out of my mouth would be ratting out the rat to Dumbledore or at least send the letter straight to ur dad or Bill Weasley so you know something will be done about it. Or go back in time and steal it when he drops the stone in rat form. Lovin the Chapter really wanna smack Riddle. |
lirel.tamora chapter 4 . 12/19/2023 I'm actually hoping she ends up with Leo when she's older since he's the only one who she's really comfortable around as herself. I like seeing their relationship with him grow and she'd end up with an exrended family that actually understands potions. |
lirel.tamora chapter 5 . 12/19/2023 I would have said forget the suppressants and let me buy two of those magical measuring devices so I can manage my magic alternately at manageable levels until I get used to it. Thank goodness she didn't use the Potentalis potion what if it made it worse and she ended up just floating and flying everywhere without a broom and became a superhuman. |
lirel.tamora chapter 5 . 12/19/2023 I would've said forget the suppressants and let me buy 2 of those magical measuring devices so I can alternatively sifon off my magic to managable levels till i get use to it. Thank goodness she didn't use the potentalis potion what if it was even worse she'd end up like superman just flying around all the time cause she can't stop using her magic to even walk like a normal person anymore. |
Adefina chapter 2 . 10/29/2023 I’m not sure why I’m reviewing on such an old chapter, but I have to say, I think having Bill being in the lower alleys and randomly seeing Harry is so funny! I’m slowly making my way through these old fics. Also, this story is just so well written, it’s amazing. |
Piletorn chapter 15 . 7/10/2023 Thank you for writing this great story! Off to find the next installation |