Reviews for A Shot in the Dark
howlingillusions chapter 11 . 4/20/2014
1. Savanna, just because I was so excited about her!
2. Probably Savanna's, because Nubu just confused me.
3. Oh I really don't know, Arthur had some good ones.
4. I actually really enjoyed this chapter and District 4.
5. I like how we have a reference area.
howlingillusions chapter 10 . 4/20/2014
1. Definitely Cohush! I really like his caring attitude and healing skills, and feel bad that he has no friends.
2. Brutice because I didn't expect him to look so handsome, Arthur because I didn't expect him to look like that, and a lot of others because I get this really clear mental picture which is pretty different from most of those.
3. Coral was exactly like I expected, blonde, big eyed, and beautiful.
4. At least in looks, my opinion got changed on Slate, he seems older and wiser then his years.
5. They are perfect! They don't give away too much, but give us a feel for each of their personalities.
howlingillusions chapter 8 . 4/20/2014
1. I connected more with Ben, honestly, because sometimes I can be lazy, but I don't lie or mooch much.
2. I think Slate because of his motivation, Jinx because of obvious reasons, and Percy because he seems like a pretty strong boy, as well as determined, and he loves his home.
3. The last escort, I think her name was Skeleton, because CREEPY!
4. I think Leaf, because she is weak and young, Ben 'cause he's young and lazy, and probably Francis because he doesn't seem to pay attention.
howlingillusions chapter 7 . 4/20/2014
1. Oh my, these are incredibly interesting tributes! That's awfully hard, but I have to say Francis because I like him better.
2. I really like Percy, Francis, and Arthur, because of their personalities.
3. Brutice, Coral, and Jinx are my least favorite because Brutice is a normal One boy, I have no feel for Coral at all, and because Jinx is REALLY scary.
4. Honestly, I don't know.
howlingillusions chapter 6 . 4/20/2014
1. Alister stood out to me more because he takes a ton of Tessare, and because of his romance struggle.
2. Um, I liked the Little Talk lyrics because they really applied to the tributes and because I know that song.
3. I really liked District Three's escort just because she seemed so Capitol-ly.
4. Nessa, because she's my tribute. Oops.
5. Possibly...
6. Superb, as always! ;)
howlingillusions chapter 5 . 4/20/2014
YAYYY! I'm back! Every time a update popped up in my email, I wanted to cry. Anyways, questions!

1. Percy honestly stood out to me more because I thought he would be like Percy Jackson, but he's not. I liked his personality a lot, actually, but I don't really know why.
2. Coral's POV was as always well written, but I didn't really get a feel for her personality, looks, or even her family really. I loved Percy's POV, he seemed like he solved problems very easily. The escort was very great, funny, and sounded like she looked very Capitol. Loved the mention of Annie and Finnick.
3. Yes, the lyrics seem perfect for the tributes.
4. I don't know, I'm not terribly interested in that.
SpaceAgeDino chapter 14 . 4/19/2014
An excellent chapter set in the Capitol. Your writing has greatly improved since your last SYOT. The characterization and flow of this chapter were very good.



Alessandra: I can't stand her. She is SO similar to Precious, its horrifying. I'm glad her costume didn't meet her expectations.

Alister: He's a well-mannered and well-rounded tribute that reminds me of Roland. I liked his interactions with Arthur. Lux seems very playful.

Constance: Brucite in an angel costume is amusing. I liked Connie's appraisal of the other careers. Her discussion about honor and glory versus being adored a good moment of characterization.

Cohush: Poor Camo, everyone seems to know Snow hates him. The anti-Capitol sentiment of Cohush is interesting. I can't believe Ben was so rude. Actually I can believe it. Ben is an un-disciplined brat. The interaction between Cohush and Leaf was interesting.

Leaf: I feel sorry for her. Such a cute girl and she's treated like garbage. I can't wait for Ben to be killed for the sport of crows.

Francis - The arena is no place for someone like him. I liked the context in which he used his "quote." He needs to have a vision soon or he'll be just another creative tribute skilled in camouflage.

Annabell: It will be interesting to see the extent to which she finds her voice. I wasn't expecting her to bond with Willa, but they seem to get along will. Their encounter with the careers was interesting in that Annabell and Willa weren't very intimidating.

Percy: He certainly is the outsider amongst the careers. It is interesting how he acts too impulsively and immediately feels regret. He and Coral are so much like siblings. Serafina following Percy was...interesting.

Savanna: Being rejected by an alliance is not a good sign. I liked that she used her quote. At least she finally found her skill.

Slate: I liked his interactions with Enobaria and Brutus. I found it amusing that he refused to outdone in the token show-down. Your description of Serafina's token was well-written.

Willa: She and Annabell are an interesting and likeable duo. Willa is certainly focused on alliance building. Lux and Alister would be interesting additions. Nubu would probably be the outsider of the group.

Bark: Quite the feast for the district 11 tributes. Bark seems resigned to his fate.

2) Constance because her POV was well-rounded and had good characterization.

3) Bark because I felt that it wasn't a dynamic POV.


Love: None
Like: Alister, Annabell, Percy
Neutral: Constance, Leaf, Francis, Savanna, Slate
Dislike: Cohush, Willa, Bark
Loathe: Alessandra

5) The tributes whose POV weren't shown in this chapter, especially Serafina and Camo.
Christine Mulheim chapter 14 . 4/19/2014
That last review was by me, by the way... log in is being funky.
Guest chapter 14 . 4/19/2014
Whoa, that's a long chapter!
Alessandra- I'm not really a huge fan of her, she seems really shallow, definitely with a District One personality. I hope you revisit the whole moving districts thing, because I really want to know the reason for that. For allies, maybe with the Careers, but those odds are slim. Maybe one other ally with her.
Alister- I think he and Arthur would be great together, they just seem like a good team. I liked the interactions with the mentors and the contrast between him and Lux. Also, I enjoyed hearing about he other tributes from his perspective, especially Jinx. He won't win, but if he has a strong alliance, I could see him in the top half.
Constance- Yay! They aren't kings and queens this year! I liked hearing about her district partner, and the dynamics between the two. Connie isn't my favorite, she seems to be the poster girl for District One and will probably be the first Career to die.
Cohush- Once again, awesome interactions, especially with Alexis and Ben. I'm on the fence about Alexis and Cohush allying, but, then again, Alexis would be a good ally for Alessandra. The whole gum spitting part was hilarious, loved Alexis's reaction. Cohush and Leaf aren't my favorite alliance and will probably be one of the first to go, unless they get stronger allies.
Leaf- This is one of my favorite POVs in this chapter! The Johanna and Blight interactions were spot on and amazing, letting us know Blight a little better, since he isn't talked about much in the book. But Ben... I really don't like him, he seems to be playing as the antagonist in the story, pretty much making everyone hate him.
Francis- One of my favorite tributes! Loved the whole training thing and the fact that not everyone is great with a weapon. And you don't usually see any action at the camouflage station, so that was unique. Not really sure who he would ally with or even if he would ally at all. Maybe Arthur and Alister?
Annabell- Willa has an ally! Originally, I never would have guessed that the two would be together, but now I can see the chemistry. I really liked the mace lesson from Percy, showing a softer side to the Careers, but might be a flaw that could get him betrayed.
Percy- I must say, even though I was skeptical about the PJ series, you have really worked on making him more unique. Still not my favorite, but he's no longer my least. And I might see a little crush going on between Coral and him! One sided though, as Coral seems a bit stalkerish.
Savanna- Almost thought that Willa would have another ally there... but maybe Savanna and Francis would be a good match? Really liked this POV.
Slate- At first he came across as a typical Career, but now he seems to be standing out a bit more. Once again, awesome mentor moments, and good dynamics with Sera. I wonder if she will turn on him...
Willa- great job portraying her leadership! I think she could work well with Nubu, and maybe show Ben who's boss. Also, maybe she could recruit Leaf and Cohush.
Bark- and let the Disgusting Games begin. This will be interesting to see. The two might become a good pair, but it's unlikely as now he just wants to get out of the alliance.
Great chapter and I can't wait for the next one!
RosesandThorns11 chapter 14 . 4/18/2014
Hey! I enjoyed the chapter and I liked reading in the POVs.
I liked Willa's the most and she seemed very well written.
I didn't like Savanna's very much. :/
Love: Willa, Annabell
Like: Bark, Slate
Neutral: Percy, Leaf, Cohush, Aister
No: Savanna, Alessandra,
Hate: Francis

:) - RosesnadThorns11
GloryToTheWind chapter 14 . 4/18/2014
Another great chapter, as usual!
1. I thought each POV was well written and clearly showed off the person personality, and they were definitely enjoyable to read. good job!
2. I'm sorry, I'm going to be really biased but, Annabell's! You really communicated her well.
3. Mah, I didn't really like Alessandra's, just because she was really self centered.
Love: Annabell, Savanna
Like: Willa, Percy, Slate
Neutral: Cohush, Leaf, Aister
No: Constance, Francis, Bark
Hate: Alessandra

Enodllewwow chapter 14 . 4/18/2014
Okayyyy, so review time!
My thoughts on each POV:
Alessandra Balis:
Even though I don't like her I do think she will change in the games, maybe she has some fighter in her. Precious seems very big-headed but I guess most Capital people are.
Alister Rain:
I love his chariot costume! Tuesday is a strange name but then again it is Panem. Willa is mean and that could help her or bring her down in the games.
Constance Von Trapp:
She is not my favourite but I did enjoy her POV. Angels? no wonder Brucite did not like his outfit! Brucite is very big-headed but Constance shocked me with how down to earth she was.
Cohush Nigrum:
Awww, he is soooooooooo cute! Poor Camo, its not good when the president is out to get you. I laughed when he got hit in the face with gum...but it was mean...
Leaf Ender:
I think Leaf and Cohush will make good a good team. I don't like bed much and I can see him getting on the wrong side of people. Blight was cute and you wrote Johanna very well.
Annabel Berry:
I am glad she found someone ally w with and SHE IS SPEAKING! Not who I expected to team up with but I hope it works out.
Percy Brinzo:
Percy is not that bad, not my favourite but not that bad. I can see him braking away from the careers in the arena and I don't think the careers will work well together this year.
Savanna Poopet-
YAY! she said her quote! Poor Nubu, ditched by his own District partner. Now I feel sorry for Savanna, being rejected by Willa but I guess for Willa she got it nice. I hope Nubu finds love and a friend.
Slate Bessaron-
I don't like him as much as I first did as he seems very big-headed. I wonder if something is going on between him and Sarafina...
Willa Seamstress:
Nubu might get in an alliance! I wonder how Savanna will feel when they ask Nubu as she was rejected by the same alliance. Its nice to see that Willa and Annabel are getting on well. Is Camo Allied with Willa or not? I am not sure. Willa was very mean to Woof...
Bark Umbral:
This POV made me hungry :( Not much to say about this POV but I think him and Nessa will make a grate team!
Favourite POV: Willa's because I think you got to see a bit of hers, Annabel and Camo's personality and it was very interesting that she dose not really have a mentor.
Least favourite POV: Barks, I just think it was very dull (not the writing, the writing was perfect) but I did like seeing him talk with Nessa.
Love (taking away my characters)- Savanna and Annabell
Like: Bark, Alister and Cohush
Neutral: Percy, Willa, Leaf, Constance
No: Francis, Slate, Assandra, Brucite
Hate: None
who do I want to see:
Nubu, I want to see if he finds love or a friend (Camo or if there is someone else in the pool orf tributes who is gay. However I guess they don't have to like him so it could be any). Camo, see's if he gets in an alliance. Savanna, see how she reacts to Nubu being asked into the alliance and Leaf and Cohush, I just enjoy reading them.
magikmajic chapter 14 . 4/18/2014
1) Alessandra: Loved it. Hate her, but the way you wrote her part was really like her personality and it was descriptive and captivating.
Alister: Well, I feel like it was more about him observing others than his real thoughts, so I'm pretty neutral about this one.
Connie: Love it! It was so her and her voice really popped in her POV.
Cohush: I hated this one. I'm sorry, but I don't love Cohush that much in the first place, and I despised him in this POV. I can't explain it, it was just so baaaadddd! But, as a positive point, Ben was worse. I hate him so much that I slammed on my desk whenever he showed up.
Leaf: I may be slightly biased, but I loved her. I think her true personality showed, but I wish she had been portrayed as more shy than scared because I think she has a brave side too.
Francis: I thought this was really sweet. He seemed shy and less immature than before so I liked him a lot better. I think his painting will do him well :)
Annabell: I think it was great that we finally heard her talk, and I LOVE the Annabell/Willa alliance. It is just PERFECT.
Percy: I'm glad my Coral showed up, and I think they're little talk was great. It exemplified Percy's girl problems.
Savanna: I really thought she would end up a part of Annabell and Willa's alliance, so it surprised me, and the fact that her sassy 'tude was gone kind of made it realistic.
Slate: It showed him as the calm and collected man that he is. Nice.
Willa: Once again, loved it because I love the alliance and the early planners.
Bark: I think it was sweet and it changed my negative opinion about Bark.
2) Constance. It was just perfect to her personality and she has SO MUCH VOICE!
3) Cohush. I think I explained above.
4) Love: Connie, Annabell, Willa
Like: Alessandra, Alister, Leaf, Slate
Neutral: Savanna, Bark, Percy, Francis
No: none
Hate: Cohush
5) Coral, because she is my baby and I wanna see her reaction to her fight with Percy, Camo, because I'm sure he has some...feelings about Pres. Snow, Surtr, because I want to see his social skills, Nubu, because I think it would be interesting if someone found out his secret.
HungerGamesFan20 chapter 14 . 4/18/2014
1: *Le Sigh...* You secretly want me to kill you sometimes...

Alessandra's: I absolutely LOVED hers! Joking. I hate her. She is a spoilt brat. And she makes me want to punch her. She keeps banging on how she hates District 3, THEY ARE THE ONLY REASON YOU ARE ALIVE!

Alister's: Meh, it was good.

Constance's: Aside from her killing her sister, she is actually quite funny. I liked her "I could of been from District 4" thing :P

Cohush's: He creeped me out a bit. The way he was so like "We'll be GREEEEEAAAAT Allies!" was weird...

Leaf's: She made me laugh because her thought pattern was identical to mine xD

Francis': He'll be boring... *Yawn* He won't have any action in the games. He'll either be a bloodbath or he will wait the games out hiding.

Annabelle's: I feel bad, but Annabelle isn't particularly interesting, at all. Her keeping mum for so long her voice barely works confuses me, and it seems a bit unlikely.

Percy's: Oh, YOU WROTE HIM AS PERFECTLY AS I IMAGINED! His sibling relationship with Coral is really cute xD But um, the whole Serafina thing is... strange. She either has a plan she wants to tell him, or she has a crush on him, is my prediction anyway.

Savanna's: Not too interesting, basically the same thing as Francis' review. I did like how she was searching for her true purpose though.

Slate's: Hes making me like him more and more. He isn't a favourite, but he is very likable :P

Willa's: Willa, Willa, Willa... Why is she allies with the girl who will die in the first few days! I do not understand!

Bark's: I liked the whole thing with how he got annoyed with Woof, only to feel guilty, that was a cool feature :P

2: Percy, because he is EXACTLY like I imagined him. Even the bit where he said "Scram, Brat" and then immediately felt bad was just, UGH. Amazing!

3: Alessandra. Because of her entire. Personality. And. Views. Everything about her makes me hate her more.

Love: Percy, Slate.

Like: Leaf, Annabelle, Bark, Constance.

Neutral: Willa, Savanna, Francis, Alister.

No: Cohush.


Special place for Alessandra: Alessandra

5: Coral, I want to see the sibling relationship with Percy MOAR!
BamItsTyler chapter 14 . 4/18/2014
Oh my gosh...SO MUCH QUESTIONS! I have to open my tablet up and get this chapter up on it so I can answer these questions for you.

WOOOO UPDATE! Please keep this speed, I think this is one of the only SYOT's I've joined that ever got passed all reapings...Kudo's to you! I can't wait to submit another tribute for your next one.

1. Alessandra: Her Pov was okay...Nothing really caught my attention. I don't think I saw her with the Careers in this chapter. Maybe in the next one she'll approach us.

2. Alister: I got to see Lux In action, she seems pretty goofy and cool. Ben picking his nose sounds pretty disgusting, but typical for a kid with his personality. Willa seems to be at work with alliances already...

3. Constance: I first didn't like her, but now I do. Her logical take on things I like alot, especially with her conversation with Brucite really brings it out. Honor and glory vs Adoration. And Brucite seems to have developed more from just a typical brute! I loved the way She, Brucite and the other careers acted during training, hopefully we see more of that in next chapters.

4. Cohush!: Haha! I liked this PoV, especially with Ben throwing a wad of gum at him...Ben you're so disgusting! And then Cohush tries to stick it to him by chatting with Leaf. Speaking of leaf I see a possible romance!? (HOPEFULLY). I can't wait to see how he and her develop.

5. Leaf: (The same applies with her pertaining to Cohush.) Aww, she's afraid of him...Let's see if that changes. I especially adored the little "Rue" moment when she spied on Percy and Coral, that was adorable. Between ben and Her I prefer her. I see Ben has no table manners as well...Lol!

(You're breaking me down with these questions! I'M STILL ON THE FIRST ONE.)

6. Francis: I'm neutral with his PoV. I was hoping he would get a vision due to his what was it? Schizophrenia? Maybe later though.

7. Annabell: Nothing too much going on here! We do find out she's capable of limited speech! She also gets recruited into the supposedly anti-career alliance.

8. Percy: Woohoo! We get to see the Career alliance at work. It seems that they are somewhat anti-social with Percy...Unfortunate. We also get to see a little Coral/Percy development, I could see possible romance if they stopped bickering for a moment...I think. I don't know! :/ A Four boy who doesn't like tridents...that seems odd to me.

9. Savanna: "Move you old nincompoop! I wanna try throwing an axe" Haha...Ben. Savanna herself was neutral to me.

10. Slate!, I smiled when I scrolled down and saw his name! Of course I'm going to love his PoV more than anyone elses. Psh! I see a little Constance development in there, good stuff...You captured his sarcasm and overall snarkiness well, I applaud you for that! The drunken Enobaria/Brutus scene was the best in my opinion, especially when she got his name wrong, Lol! Serefina seems much more cold and aloof...and somewhat innocent from the first time I read about her, but maybe that's because of her relationship with boys. I enjoyed the development between her and Slate. I wonder what her token was about? probably from her former boyfriend.

11. Willa: I'm not too fond of tributes like her...The outspoken "F**k the establishment/I hate careers" sorta ones...It's working in her favour though, but I dont like it ._.

12. Bark: Because I love District Eleven, I enjoyed this PoV. I adored the development between Nessa and Bark. Why would he want to disband the alliance!? And then the last part about Nessa not catching what he did with the sauce...And his final words seem a little bit off to me. You better not do anything evil Bark! Hmph!

Question # 2: Slate's PoV obviously :D, I can't wait for the interviews! That's going to be a real treat.

Question # 3: Alessandra's simply because nothing great happened...Not that I hated it or anything, there just wasn't anything noteworthy.

Love: Slate, Constance, Percy

Like: Cohush, leaf, Bark

Neutral: Willa, Annabell, Alister, Francis, Savanna

No: Alessandra

Dislike: None.

I'm looking forward to Nessa's PoV, maybe even Jinx oh! and Camo, don't forget about Camo! Maybe even a little Ben action. Oh! and the interviews are something I'm going to love.

Can't wait until the next update. :).

Keep on keepin on!
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