|Reviews for The Investigation|
| NateSean chapter 6 . 10/25/2005
Very beautifully done.
I think your Alan will make a better primogen than mine, hehe.
| NateSean chapter 5 . 3/31/2005
Nicely done so far. Is this the end or are you going to conclude it with Sharon's embrace?
| NateSean chapter 4 . 3/23/2005
The story is very engaging and I like how you use the tension caused by Eddie's death as the emotional backdrop of the city.
I like how you keep Julian in character. Even towards clans he has his own apprehensions about, he's fair.
One thing stood out: Jason came over and sat down across from her a few minutes after Alan left. “Did he say what clan he is?”
“No, but I didn’t ask. He looks like one of us,” Sasha replied. “He’s good looking...”
“He’s not one of you, Sasha. Stay away from him,” Julian said quietly as he sat down next to her.
After that last line, you didn't mention if Jason had left, and it took me a second to figure out whether or not he was still there.
| NateSean chapter 3 . 2/23/2005
Very intense again.
| NateSean chapter 2 . 12/18/2004
Not a bad chapter. My one bit of constructive criticism is how characters relay events to one another. Like when Sharon was describing the events of the previous night to Frank and Sonny, for example. Basically there was very little difference between how she was describing it, and how you as the narrator described it. It tends to border on redundancy.
Hope you decide to continue this. I'd like to add your story to my C2 community. If you're interested e-mail me.
| NateSean chapter 1 . 12/5/2004
Not a bad piece to go with the events of the episode. Will you continue it?
| Soledad chapter 1 . 12/5/2003
This is a fantastic story. I like your Assamite, and would be interested how the tale continues. Will there be more?