Reviews for Maelstrom DxD |
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![]() ![]() ![]() Are you going to update any of your stories. By the way loved the 3 chapters of this fic |
![]() ![]() Aint nikaido yuri a pornstar? |
![]() ![]() ![]() Chakra is exclusively used for a Youkai, and their children so a pure Human having this is impossible read the Dxd light novels again. Chakra exists but it is not designed for Humans, and if you are stating that Bikou a member of Vali’s team can use is because he is a descendant of the Monkey King. |
![]() ![]() ![]() I can see why this didn't go far it's pretty bad no change to story hell even made him a pervert also but meh this shits old anyway just felt like placing a review for anyone that clicks on reviews first don't waste your time it's shit |
![]() ![]() ![]() What a terrible story... You make him confident and flirty and such most of the time which I like but then suddenly you switch it to a cliche flustered personality... doesn't help that he basically fell in love with Asia the moment he saw her and from that I know I'm not gonna enjoy this story anymore. |
![]() ![]() ![]() MY way, stop using his as my, it's so freaking annoying. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Great story a shame you stopped it. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Thank you for creating this wonderful story that has helped me move through dark time I am currently going through both my great grandparents on my father's side died this week can you please inform me when someone continues the story for you thank you |
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![]() ![]() ![]() Seriously look out for your grammar. Fight sequences were a drab affair too. You could have spiced it up a little with actual motion. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Are you really writing this sober? This was awful. Correct the possessive articles you have written 'my', 'hers' and yours as his in many places. |
![]() ![]() ![]() You realize that multiple times in this chapter you wrote sentences that had the opposite meaning of what you intended? You wrote that the One-sama's beauty WAS exaggerated, and you wrote that Sona DID miss that a year had gone by. How careless can you get dude, these errors are incredibly distracting. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Should have made Tsubaki (Sona's Queen) Sailor Mars with Fire Powers, and Koneko in a Mini Moon suit. Also should have had Naruto turn into "Naruko" in Sailor Moon outfit, would have been Funny as h3ll |
![]() ![]() ![]() you need to re-wright some of this. almost everywhere you have the word "his" replacing the word "My" its a constant typo, that's rather annoying, but otherwise great start. I hope Yuri-Sensei is in the Harem that would be hot, and yes I do remember her. |
![]() ![]() ![]() I like this story and was interested in it. I like to see another chapter as well. If someone adopts it, let me know. |