|Reviews for Sword of Origin: Protector of Zero|
| xXBlackDragonXx chapter 7 . 4/11
So fast paced...and your writing style makes it worse. It's like a story compressed thousands of times just to squeeze out a fight
| Roxas fleur chapter 16 . 4/7
wah i want to see shirou's reaction!
| FractiousDay chapter 16 . 4/3
Good start, but I think you over reached in scope
| Partsu chapter 2 . 4/2
hnnng, the feels... This one is melting from feels. Good~
*Melts into blissful goo*
| JamesFreki chapter 16 . 4/2
To late, Rin. Anyway, interesting story, hope you continue it.
| the grey mage chapter 13 . 3/10
this was confusing
| the grey mage chapter 6 . 3/10
i immensely enjoy how human you make Louise. but the swords you use and the power you throw around make no sense. its like using a nuke to kill a fly.
| OriksGaming chapter 15 . 2/22
Well, it's going on four months since you last updated, so, as per Rin/Taiga's wishes, I'm reminding you to update yours fics. If you have time, of course. I'm not trying to mess with your schedule; I'm just really excited for the next chapter.
| ARSLOTHES chapter 16 . 2/15
looking forward to the next chapter
| Guest chapter 5 . 2/14
The tiger dojo is retarded, please stop
| EvilDragonMuspelheim chapter 14 . 1/15
too much of the pronoun game going on here.
| Guest chapter 16 . 1/5
we are off to see the wizard the wonderful wizard of wizkidhv because...
| Ugly chapter 6 . 12/22/2016
This story is only one step from flat out copying other authors works. It comes across as little more than a rewrite of other popular stories in this crossover section.
| OriksGaming chapter 16 . 12/21/2016
Ah, I was wondering how you were going to handle the relationship, considering that if you'd left her in, well, her usual body, Shirou would be sorta guilty of pedophilia if he returned her feelings in any physical way. Not that waiting a couple years for her to become of age would have been a task for someone who's already been alive for well over a millennium. And while she's technically sixteen, she really looks a lot younger and just thinking of her having sex in her previous body . . . is not at all appealing.
If Shirou felt/feels the same way about her, he'd be more than willing to show his affection in more platonic ways(sans any kisses that Louise initiated) until she sprung it on him one or two years later that she wanted to have sex right that instant- something which he wouldn't really have even considered until then; I'm not saying that Shirou is stupid, just extremely naive and frequently in denial. Which I can really see Louise doing, considering that she's naturally somewhat hotheaded and is getting well acquainted with the fact that Shirou is extremely naive when it comes to romance, or even feelings in general. Of course, that would be if you hadn't given her a super makeover by way of Rin and is purely hypothetical.
I like the duality- the gold and silver. On another note, I'm really anticipating her mother's reaction especially- I doubt it'll be pretty, in a messy landscape changing way; my prediction is that she'll blame Shirou for it immediately. Which wouldn't exactly be incorrect, because he basically gave Louise carte blanche to train in his magic as long as she was careful and it was in using it that her body initially changed, even if the aging up seems to have been caused by Rin.
And I'm also interested in Kirche's reaction- not because I dislike her or anything or care about her being shown up, but because I'm intensely interesting in how you're going to characterize her in that instant. Is she going to step back and cede Shirou to Louise, showing that while she harbored a slight attraction, it was mostly teasing? Or will she decide to 'compete' with Louise for his affection, showing that it's either more than a simple crush or just a really, really strong crush.
Possible Slight Spoiler if I'm reading things correctly:
I also saw what you did there at the end- I'm not sure how I feel about that concept, really. It would make sense and make me feel better about the fact that Louise is sixteen or seventeen and Shirou is one thousand plus years old. Still, I hope it's more like a reincarnation with slight recall than a nearly complete body transplant where she'll remember her past life- because I think that, in that case, Louise definitely wouldn't be the dominant personality, and that would kind of ruin all the character growth you've had her undergo. Or Rin could just appear in the form of a second train of thought- aka, a voice in her head.
And just to clarify, even if you won't spoil it for me(in a good way), from what I've read, I've deduced, whether incorrectly or correctly, that Rin essentially did something that resulted in her being reincarnated in some form into Louise, allowing Louise to summon Shirou because of a connection between souls or something like that. And that she's appeared to Louise in her dreams mostly because she's pretty much buried super deep in Louise's subconscious. She may also, at some point, become comic relief in the form of a full time voice in Louise's head. I wouldn't mind you telling me whether I'm right or wrong, but it's ultimately your prerogative on whether or not you do; it won't change my anticipation for the next chapter or my enjoyment of the story- just putting that out there.
Anyways, I'm done rambling and spouting uncertain predictions. Thanks for reading my extremely long winded review.
| Telron chapter 16 . 12/6/2016
interesting developments and great chapter as well