|Reviews for In Control Now|
| Beatz1992 chapter 2 . 8/30/2014
R u going to continue this. Really want to see how many injuries "Ronald" will get be4 he just stops.
| dadby chapter 2 . 8/21/2014
Another brilliant chapter! Can't wait for more!
| dadby chapter 1 . 8/21/2014
That was great! Loved it! Thanks for sharing!
| Mark chapter 2 . 8/18/2014
Please continue this story.
| Mark chapter 2 . 8/1/2014
Please update. I like the way this is going.
| redwolf23456 chapter 2 . 8/2/2014
Great story so far
| Firewolfe chapter 2 . 6/20/2014
| funlove109 chapter 2 . 5/16/2014
Omg. That was very good. Please update soon!
| ElizabethAnneSoph chapter 2 . 5/9/2014
That was interesting! Loved the bet and the way Harry and Hermione are with each other! And yeah Neville stood up to Ron bloody Weasley! So glad they beat him up! Hope more is coming!
My deepest compliments on your story
| Linda chapter 2 . 4/24/2014
I like your story, but you need a beta to help you threw this story.
| tchizek chapter 2 . 4/26/2014
Interesting story so far.
| Vegasman59 chapter 2 . 4/25/2014
Don't you think its about time Dumb-as-a-door was consulted about this? Great start by the way.
| firebolthallow1572 chapter 2 . 4/21/2014
I hope this get up dated soon.
| LillyPheonix chapter 2 . 4/13/2014
You need a Beta Reader kiddo. I enjoyed reading the relationship pairings that you have used, as well as the overall concept of this fanfic. With that being said, however, what I am having trouble deciphering is the entirety of its layout and the numerous grammar errors.
I underatand, from your AN's, that you are a young writer; I applaud how brave you are to write about a genre tale that is extremely popular. You are a risk taker and I can see how far, with proper instruction, you may go. Although writing for enjoyment is one thing, writing for an audience is another.
When trying to engage a specific target audience, there needs to be a certain level of fluidity in your writing, otherwise your readers won't be able to make heads or tails of your story. In middle school, (mind you that was 15 years ago), I learned about two techique that have been a lifesaver all through H.S. and college: FAT-P and CUPS.
The FAT-P stands for: Format, Audience, Topic, and Purpose. CUPS stands for: Capitalization, Punctuation, and Spelling. Ask your English teacher about them, and I'm sure he/she will tell you. If not, PM me.
I will follow this story for now, but as I stated earlier, you need a Beta Reader. Ask a friend, your parents, or your English teacher for assistance. You will be surprised how responsive they can be.
Best of luck,
| Delightfully sinful chapter 2 . 4/12/2014
Great start, please include some summer adventures! It's rarely done and they're fun to read. I've been spreading this message around and have yet to see anyone do anything with it so I don't expect you to either. I'm expecting this fic to be just like all the others. Even the greats have become predictable. Do something different or something not commonly done.