Reviews for Forsaken And Begotten
Anne Camp aka Obi-quiet chapter 1 . 4/28/2011
Well, I like the premesis, and I love what you did with Obi-wan.

Yoda's words felt off to me as he just speaks bakwards. I'll give you "Alright if join you I do?" but the second line feels more like you were just trying to mix it up. "Not intruding, am I?" would probably be a little closer, even though its something just about everyone might say.

Also, "Qui-gon felt his hopes, desires and dreams shatter"? I disagree. Even if that were the case, they'd sent him off, and Qui-gon was rather determined to not care for Obi-wan at all. Now something like "Qui-gon felt a pang of regret stab through him," or similar I would give. Otherwise, it just doesn't sound in character.
hentai18ancilla chapter 11 . 4/23/2011
Any future slash?
CalamityJim chapter 4 . 1/19/2011
Heh Heh heh. Omnipotent rectitude. I liked that.
Selene467 chapter 34 . 11/20/2010
Wow, I can't even begin to explain how wonderfull this story is. I loved Obi's togorian family and it broke my heart to read the scene wherer they finally were torn apart. Tuuvu is a great character, actually all your characters are fantastic.

The story itself is harsh, painful, fileld with torturing angst and yet moments of bliss, peace and heartshattering interactions. I've read other stories involving angst and most are plain torture and stuff, but your angst genre is different. Instead of full blown angst you build it up little by little, every chapter you feel the tension rising, you fear what will come next on top of everything you know already. It creeps up to you and the further you get into the story the more heartwrenching it gets.

And if Obi's life wasn't hard enough, his sentence predicts doom and more creeping angst.

I love how you have Obi, almost unconsciously grow towards Qui-Gon all over again. He sort of hated the man for ruining his life, yet somehow the man crept his way into Obi's heart and mind, just like Obi tends to do with everyone else around him, with some horrible exceptions of course, but lets rudely ignore those few XD

Now there was something else I wanted to say...oh right, Obi's torturer's voice in his mind. Very creepy and very nervewrecking. I can practically hear the man's tauting and plain creepy voice whenever I read his speech.

On tat point I also like to congratulate you on the wonderful way to make us realise how horrible the torture under the certain captain was without actually giving any details, that is until the trial and even there you kept details at a minimum. This is probably for the rating, but I like the effect it gives your story. You hint at it, Obi reveals slight things, but mostly it's the consequences of what was done that reveal how horrible it all truly was and it's plain brilliant writing.

Qui-Gon's character was well written, I loved his completely rude and don't give a damn behaviour whenever they decided on stuff that weren't in favor to Obi wan or qui-Gon himself, wanting to keep the rogue close and not give him up for anything. Thahl and Bant's involvement in the story were brilliantly used and true to character according to me.

Also Obi's not give a care aobut my own life, so painfully and still so true to character and it just makes you love him more and makes you want to kidnap and hide him away before more horrible things can happen to him.

There is so much more to say on this story, but I can't seem to graps everything in my mind and so I will wrap things up with:

This story deserves much more reviews, honestly I was shocked and now that I finished actually appalled that this story has not even reached at least 500 rviews, I'd totally expect this to have reached 1000 reviews, especially since it's been online for so long already.

Other than that, I love this story, I love angst but the way you use the angst by building it up until people want to tear their hearts out cause it hurts too much, it's bloody brilliant and by the force you should be rewarded greatly for this achievement.

I am very eager for the sequel, obviously I'll be having high expectations (wish you hadn't written such a supernaturally brilliant story, huh? XD) and I will be reading that sequel as soon as I get a chance.

Thank you for the wonderful read, this story has taken most of my time during this week, even preventing me from doing what I usually do all my free time. So well done and congrats on this wonderful story.

Greetz Selene467

p.s. How can you torture Obi and Qui sooooooo! If they could, they would sue you XD Though I'd probably be on your side, since I want more stories :D thanks again!
Angel of Melius Prime chapter 31 . 4/4/2010
I was sitting on my sister's bed reading fanfic on a laptop while she sat next to me and read fanfic on her phone. I started crying when i read this chapter, so she looked at me and asked what was wrong. All i could say was "Poor Obi... Qui-Gon... REJECTION!" She stared at me for a minute, then hit me upside the head, effectively ruining the moment. Turning back to her fanfic, she muttered,"Anakin pwns obi any day." And it was on. But all in all, I love Obi angst. I read this story and now I can't get enough Obi angst. Congrats on finally putting up a sequel!
RoMythe chapter 34 . 3/20/2010
Ahh no! Not a cliffy! You're so mean! XD, no just kidding. I reallyreally hope for a sequel. It's one of the most unique and fascinating stories I've ever read. It took me a while, but it was worth it. I'll check your other stories out, too. But pleasepleasplease write a sequel!
Daniella Harwood chapter 34 . 1/15/2010
Normally I don't review if there is a sequel I have yet to read, but this story was so emotionally powerful that I could not finish it without conveying to you how much it captured my attention. I thought I had exhausted all the good Obi-Wan stories on , obviously I was wrong. Your eloquence and characters had me mentally holding my breath for poor Obi right from the very beginning. Your world captured me to such an extent, playing havoc with my feelings, and annoyed that his agony is not yet at end.

I shall now go and seek out the sequel to this riverting story.
Ayodia chapter 34 . 11/3/2009
Well, I loved this storie at the begenin, but now it's being to dark for me. Didn't obi-wan suffer enougth? I crave for a happy ending, so please, juste tell me how everythings ends well, but don't make me continue reading... my poor heart can't do it!
LemonYellow chapter 34 . 8/18/2009
Wow! A bit cliché but, poor Obi-Wan! Not many people can pull off stories like this...but you managed to do it very well! I really enjoyed reading this and can't wait to read the next one! Way better than the JA storyline for sure. The emotions were very good- I found myself wanting to put an arm around Obi and kick the jerks putting him through all that.

What will happen next? Who's behind all this? *bites nails* I have some ideas, but will probably be wrong :D

Obi's pirate friends kind of fell of the face of the earth (or whatever) after they left. I would have liked to have seen what was going on with them, but oh well. :)

Well done! Two thumbs way up!
asdfjkl chapter 34 . 7/21/2009
...sequel? xD
EeyoreGirl72 chapter 1 . 7/6/2009
I just finished reading this story, and it was one I couldn't stop to read. I'd stay up until the wee hours of the morning because I wanted to see what the next chapter held in story for my favorite Jedi (or in this case former Jedi), Obi-Wan. Love it! Can't wait to read the sequel!
damonkeygirl chapter 34 . 5/4/2009
Sequel? Please? Pretty please with something really yummy on top?
zafaran chapter 34 . 4/21/2009
Any chance of nudging you muse (with a pointed stick if necessary) to get the sequel to this story done? This is a *horrific* place to leave this hanging, and I dearly want to find out what happens next. You just know it's going to be just as bad or worse than his original torture when the pirates captured him, and without the force to help with his mental stability and help the memories to stay repressed, he's going to deteriorate. At this point I suspect Palpatine is going to get mixed in to try and break Obi-Wan to make a new Sith Apprentice. Getting put into the Republic equivalent of a Maximum security or even a Super-Max facility is apt to come near to breaking him, and with the Sith probably involved, it's going to be even worse. I hope your muse and schedule will allow you to write and post more chapters on more stories sometime soon. Keep up the good work. Zafaran {mailto:} zafaran {at} fastmail {dot} fm
Pointeiscool chapter 34 . 1/15/2009

I... have no words...

That was incredible.

What a fantastic story, you are an amazing author.

I really hope you do write that sequel... :)
Wandering Traveler chapter 34 . 7/15/2008
I'm afraid I'm terrible and don't often review, but this time I simply felt I must. This is a wonderfully well written fic, delightfully complex and compelling. You show a depth of understanding not only of the universe you work in, but also in what makes a solid plot and believable characters. From Obi-Wan to the barristers, each character you portray is individual, full of depth, and important to the plot. This is no mindless excuse for angst, but storytelling at it's finest. Here we follow not only a good tale about our favourite characters, but learn more about our own humanity along the way. Thank you. It has been an absolute delight to read and, of course, I would be delighted if you do manage a sequel.
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