Reviews for Mummer's Dance
Naosj chapter 5 . 8/14/2018
"Joffrey is tainted stock."

Apparently I left a review on each chapter unposted for years and has kept them in my cookie all this time.

Well, re-reading this story years later after watching Game of Thrones, I appreciate the details a lot more, but because of that I have only come to dislike having to read about Joffrey all the more.

When you've met freaks like him in real life, you'll realize sociopaths cannot be rehabilitated. They should have been put down as children, so the rest of society will never have to deal with their malign ambitions.
Masterx01 chapter 1 . 5/8/2018
Hmmm, while i find the idea of crossing FFT and ASoIaF interesting, this fic relies way too much in the assumption that the readers know about both worlds. There is very little background information about the characters that appeared here, little details about their appareances or the scenery and that very lack of general details makes it feel somewhat bland.
Creus chapter 5 . 8/27/2017
Well, that escalated fast.
Great chapter!
Creus chapter 1 . 8/27/2017
Very interesting! You have my attention.
Add to Follow/Fav.
Guest chapter 19 . 8/22/2017
Tywin is an evil man and a terrible father but he is an excellent ruler, a well meaning idiot can do more harm than a wise selfish man

Freedom to what starve be slaughtered

There will always be some exploitation, the best and brightest will elevate themselves over the common man, it’s nature, best for the species, it improves the standard of living of the human race as a whole, as long as they don’t kill anyone or otherwise actively oppress, free trade and enterprise is the only thing that has ever led to long lasting meaningful peace

People want fatty foods, loud music, regular sex, and flickering television images more than they want justice

Not easy balancing liberty, prosperity and social stability, all anarchy does is leave us at the mercy of every thug and psychopath, great for mighty warriors not so much for the average man

God made man Sam Colt made them equal

A certain amount of ruthlessness, ambition and desire for wealth is needed to get ahead in business. Ambition is about human achievement it’s only when this is taken too far (completely unfair to employees, consumers, or the environment) that’s it’s bad

Alternatively, utterly ruthless out of a fanatical dream to use his company to remake the world in the image of something he holds dear, for the greater good. Or alternatively he HAS to keep anything functioning or otherwise doing anything worthwhile because the alternatives are worse for everyone

he can and does make lots and lots of even more money with mundane means

Most corporate executives are simply businessmen who do their jobs, without overreaching or using unethical methods.

The man knows how business works, learns from others who have succeeded, and doesn't mind playing a bit dirty to achieve his goals.

The local/state/federal government's obscenely complicated regulations make it impossible for him to profit in the first place.

The person begins to start making quite a bit of money, so his even larger competitors make a "donation" to the re-election campaign of a powerful Senator. Said Senator then pushes for a whole slate of regulations that make it impossible for said person's business to continue making a profit.

The person's business becomes a great success. However, because he hired non-Union labor (he wouldn't have been able to afford Union labor, only bigger corporate competitors can), the Unions finance an Astroturf protest outside his business calling him a monstrous exploiter. The firestorm of public abuse drives him to sell his business to his competitors, thus reducing competition in the industry and resulting in every consumer paying much higher prices.

The person's business actually does fully succeed and make him a multi-millionaire. The amount of work said person had to do in order to get there means said person has very little leisure time to actually enjoy the wealth; said person is Married to the Job and hence has very few relationships
...So he devotes his life and fortune to serving the community, giving back to the impoverished classes he was once a part of

Those in charge pacify the people by making sure they are comfortable. The villains at the top realize the dangers of a 0% Approval Rating and attempt to "buy over" the people in the most effective way possible: by improving their quality of life.

The government ensures a stable, if not always comfortable status quo. Simply put, there is peace in a sense and there is enough food to keep everyone alive. If the government is toppled, mayhem will ensue and nobody wants that, even if things may eventually become better—and there's no guarantee that they will.

The Devil you know is better than the Devil you don't. Sure, the people in charge are bad enough, but take a good hard look at who will take their place, look at all the others lurking out there—at home and abroad—waiting for the chance to take over—or worse, stage a civil war over who gets to grab the reins of the power vacuum, with attendant cross-fire. NO THANKS

most good least harm and if that's not honor enough for you maybe reexamine your own definition of it

Reggie: All right, but apart from the sanitation, the medicine, education, wine, public order, irrigation, roads, a fresh water system, and public health, what have the Romans ever done for us?

Xerxes: Brought peace?

Reggie: Oh, peace? SHUT UP!

Many infrastructure projects in former colonies were built by the colonizers. Of course, mostly for entirely self-serving reasons (most railway lines will link a mine to a port rather than two major cities) but several countries in Africa have not notably extended their railway network since colonial times. With the rise of China as a global power, Chinese investment is building railway lines, highways, ports and other infrastructure - again mostly for entirely self-serving reasons, but the countries which receive this type of self-serving "aid" are not exactly in a position where numerous investors line up around the block to give credits at favorable rates.

Nazis gave the first anti-smoking, animal protection and conservation laws (the latter two of which remain in Germany

It is absolutely true that the Romans (like the Greeks before them) saw themselves as superior over barbarians (i.e. non-Romans: other Italian tribes, Greeks, Gauls, Germans, Britannics, Persians, Judeans et al.) but that superiority was civic and military. The cultural and intellectual nationalism of the Romantic era (which underpinned colonialist propaganda) was not really a thing for the ancient Romans. During the Punic Wars, the Romans admitted to have reverse-engineered Carthaginian triremes to match their rivals on sea, and even during the third and final Carthaginian war, express orders were given to preserve Carthaginian texts and other knowledge about agriculture for their benefit. The Romans were also remorseful about killing Archimedes (who allied with the Carthaginians) during the siege of Syracuse, as well as accidentally burning the library of Alexandria during Caesar's invasion.
Likewise, the Romans admitted that Greeks were superior to them in language and culture despite conquering and subjugating them. Caesar admitted that Egyptian astronomers were smarter than Romans and borrowed from them to devise the Julian calendar. Indeed, part of the reasons why Romans were so proud and smug was because they saw themselves as the underdog defeating and subjugating smarter, richer and more powerful civilizations. The Romans also were big on syncretism and always hungry for new religious fads and despite the fact that the Persian Empires of Parthia and Sassanid were historical holdouts against the Romans, they still borrowed stuff from Persian culture most notably the highly popular Mithras and Manichean beliefs which could have potentially displaced Christianity being that they were far more popular among the lower-classes than Christianity was for a while

An organized approach brings the most good for all.
Laws exist to bring prosperity to those under them.
Unjust laws must be overturned or changed in a reasonable and positive fashion.
People rule; laws help.
Cause the most good through the least harm. (and I say if that's not honor enough for you maybe you should examine your own morality)
Protect the weak.
Goodness is not a natural state, but must be fought for to be attained and maintained.
Lead by example.
Let your deeds speak your intentions.
Goodness radiates from the heart.
Give others your mercy, but keep your wits about you.

1. Stendarr says: Be kind and generous to the people of Tamriel. Protect the weak, heal the sick, and give to the needy.
2. Arkay says: Honor the earth, its creatures, and the spirits, living and dead. Guard and tend the bounties of the mortal world, and do not profane the spirits of the dead.
3. Mara says: Live soberly and peacefully. Honor your parents, and preserve the peace and security of home and family.
4. Zenithar says: Work hard, and you will be rewarded. Spend wisely, and you will be comfortable. Never steal, or you will be punished.
5. Talos says: Be strong for war. Be bold against enemies and evil, and defend the people of Tamriel.
6. Kynareth says: Use Nature's gifts wisely. Respect her power, and fear her fury.
7. Dibella says: Open your heart to the noble secrets of art and love. Treasure the gifts of friendship. Seek joy and inspiration in the mysteries of love.
8. Julianos says: Know the truth. Observe the law. When in doubt, seek wisdom from the wise.
9. Akatosh says: Serve and obey your Emperor. Study the Covenants. Worship the Nine, do your duty, and heed the commands of the saints and priests.
10. The Nine say: Above all else, be good to one another.
BukkakeNoJutsu chapter 18 . 6/6/2017
Fuck him up, Ramza!
LittleNK chapter 18 . 6/6/2017
Glad to see the update.
Guest chapter 17 . 6/2/2017
Relative to the Reach. Hightower is the richest, Redwyne has all the ships, Tarly is the Reach's military powerhouse, Florent has more historical prestige, but nobody's as strong at political maneuvering and raw cunning as House Tyrell. The only reason House Tyrell is in power is because they were smart enough to give up the capital of the Reach to Aegon, after Highgarden's owner just died.

Compared to the other Great Houses of Westeros, the Tyrells have contrasting good relationships with their vassal houses (save from some exceptions) and take actual interest on their domain; for instance, the City Watch of Oldtown belongs to them. Should they have problems, the Tyrells still have a foot firm in Highgarden should there be need to regroup.

they use every trick in the book as pragmatically and hard-nosed as possible, they also haven't neglected the roles good PR and soft power can play in advancing your influence without adding people to the "who wants to kill us" list. For all they are actually playing the game as ruthlessly as others, often enough. Loved, somewhat feared, but mainly respected; and, certainly not hated: that's the route they're aiming for as a group

The Tyrells got away with putting the Baratheons under siege twice with no retribution whatsoever. Even when Stannis takes a great chunk of their bannermen, they still have complete and undisputed control of the Reach other than some dissident houses who aren't even opposing them in battle (like the Florents).

Whereas the Tyrells are physically attractive and pleasant, the Florents are butterfaces with a sense of entitlement and no social skills

Florents not only they are unsociable, they are smug, stupid and pretty ugly.

Not only are they unpleasant people as a whole, they are generally fairly unpleasant-looking, too (all sneers and ears). Subverted by the half-Florents Shireen Baratheon (she is innocence incarnate) and Edric Storm (an energetic little charmer). Even though they still have those ears, neither wear sneers.

Florents consider themselves to have a better claim to Highgarden than the Tyrells as they descend from House Gardener through the male line and not the female line like the Tyrells

They are said to be descended from Florys the Fox, a daughter of Garth Greenhand who had three husbands who did not known of each other and fathered the founders of Houses Florent, Ball, and Peake

they may have a fox as their sigil, but their arrogance and stupidity screw over nearly every single "cunning" plan they make

When Renly and Stannis each declare themselves king, Alester declares for Renly, despite Stannis being the rightful king and Selyse being his wife. This can be chalked up to Alester being loyal to his liege lord, Mace Tyrell, who declared the Reach for Renly, though it is pointed out that Brightwater Keep is too close to Highgarden for the Florents to risk Tyrell displeasure. However when Renly dies Alester breaks his oath to Mace and heads over to Stannis' camp, because if Stannis wins it will mean House Florent gets more political power in the Reach (though Mace hadn't declared for Joffrey yet). Then when Stannis' campaign is failing Alester goes behind his back and selfishly offers Shireen to the crown (as in the Lannisters who are known for their cruelty and child abuse), in exchange for a pardon and Brightwater Keep back in Florent hands. Loyalty is not this man's strongest quality.

Despite his flaws, he is the only Florent encountered so far who is not a R'hllor fanatic or a complete Jerkass. He even treats Davos courteously

Just like Harlen Tyrell surrendered the Reach to Aegon The Conqueror by bending the knee, Mace Tyrell surrendered and bent the knee to Robert Baratheon when the fighting was all but lost. In both occasions, it gave them huge advantage leaps forward, consolidating their power. Dudes are very good at surrendering.

And just like ambitious house from the Reach who married their gorgeous daughter to the King and the patriarch is the second most powerful man on the country? Hello again, Hightowers! Other than that, the Tyrells don't seem to be failing in the War of Five Kings where the Hightowers did during the Dance of the Dragons, which is the fact that they have never overplayed their hand (except with Renly, and they corrected that remarkably fast).

Where the Freys have tried their social climbing the direct and dirty way when not marrying into every power in sight, the Tyrells have gone about it rather differently (if, also including marriage). Both have large families (granted, the Tyrells don't outnumber the Freys: but, they're still not a tiny family), both have Thicker Than Water tendencies. But, only one is succeeding at this whole PR thing and has plans in place for when various linchpins may no longer be in the world.

They seem to have a flexible code of honor and a love of family that's seeing them stick together and manage to stay together while forging ahead in the Decadent Court atmosphere. "Strong" is in their motto. "Stark" also means strong. The Starks remain strong through endurance and will power, the Tyrells through clever alliances. Both are loved by their smallfolk but while the Starks are honorable to a fault, the Tyrells have no true loyalties but to themselves. Both have ancestors who surrendered without a fight to Aegon the Conqueror

Like the Lannisters both are ancient and powerful houses that have been working to exert their influence over the Iron Throne to their own benefit, but whereas the Lannisters are essentially a Big Screwed-Up Family who cooperate through Teeth-Clenched Teamwork at best, the Tyrells work together out of genuine love and affection for one another, treating one another as actual family rather than rivals for power.

Some think they gave their cousins the Gardeners the idea to go fight the dragons

Did it occur to anyone that the Khal is the threat and just have him killed and when the new khal kills Dany and her child well they didn't create the Dothraki culture they can't put that on them or maybe the assassin would fail and if they don't wait until the have proof the Dothraki at least plan to invade they will not have justice on their side and the Dothraki may get over their fear of sea water for revenge

Cersei can scheme and treacher and backstab with all but the very best of them she knows how to GET power but not keep it she has no idea what to do to secure her own future or the actual job of ruling, keeping the masses or bare majority fed and entertained, she has no patience for the balancing the budget stuff and etcetera

Robert didn't thank or reward or even recognize Stannis duty and going above and beyond and his great accomplishments as well and he gave credit to others for Stannis' successes, he blamed the mistakes of others on Stannis but he gave him Dragonstone which is traditional seat of heir and technically made Stannis the third most powerful man in Westeros, to hold those parts of the Crownlands so loyal to the Targaryeans though he probably never said so to Stannis and Stannis probably didn't understand that Robert needed someone as Draconian as Stannis to keep the Targaryean loyalists in line

Baelish doesn't need to embezzle, he's a very successful pimp, not to say he doesn't manipulate the finances of the realm for his own benefit he does but through much more subtle, complicated, and far reaching parts of his schemes
Baelish is trying to create a meritocracy ninety nine percent of Westeros live in squalor

Valyrian steel blades were scarce and costly, yet thousands remained in the world, perhaps two hundred in the Seven Kingdoms alone
Guest chapter 18 . 6/2/2017
I was thinking the name Frostflame for Jon Snow a shadowcat or blue winter rose sigil Flourish, Blossom, Bloom; Suffer Not Injustice

Also Shadowflame/Phyr for daughter line of Blackfyre/phyr Sheepdog sigil Prosperity Stability Freedom

I don't believe the North will survive without the South any more than the South will survive without the North

It's generally admitted even after the ousting of the Targaryen regime that the Valyrian monarchs centralized most of Westeros into a single realm, which put an end to endemic warfare between the Seven Kingdoms, for the most part put an end to Ironborn reaving, kept the Faith of the Seven on a leash and also developed trade via the creation of a new city like King's Landing, while earlier rulers also abolished horrible practices like Droit du Seigneur and made laws common across the realm

If Aegon isn't a real Targaryean Young Griff is qualified to rule (Illyrio gave up marriage into a very influential family who never forgave him and he knew they wouldn't to marry a woman he truly loved)

Stannis is the only other one who puts the needs of the realm before his own the rest are deluded fools who fight for personal glory and power

His problem is he doesn't understand that almost anyone will believe almost anything, they will believe a lie is the truth because they want it to be true or because they are afraid it might be true

He should stop talking about his rights and start talking about how he is the best man for the job, that he always does his duty unlike the others

Stark forces rape pillage and burn just as much as their Lannister counterparts

Mace Tyrell would strangle a thousand babies to death with his bare hands if it meant putting Tyrell blood on the Iron Throne

The blood of the Riverlands is on Catelyn's hands as much as Gregor Clegane and Tywin Lannister's, her efforts to protect her children only put them in greater danger and all that other death

Balon Greyjoy wants revenge more than gold, he blames the Starks and the North for costing him his crown and his other sons and is too stupid (like most people) to see it was Stannis destroying his fleet that cost him all that

Robb is a great general he wins every battle but loses the war because he completely fails the diplomatic side of things, there is more to being a lord much less a king than winning all your battles he's wise beyond his years in some ways but still young in others to a lesser extent so is Dany Robb is a tactician but not a strategist he has no real plan for winning the war as a whole he seeks no alliances all his forces are his or his grandfather's

And how many innocents will Arya murder for her freedom, someone needs to tell her of the realm’s need for stability, and unless she wants to go beyond the Wall and hunt and kill for her daily bread, she must also do her duties as a Lady of her House as the Mormont women do, work is called work not fun for a reason, in short she doesn’t get it both ways, we need the tedious minutia of governance, someone needs to tell her war is hell something like it's about protecting your home and family and living up to noblesse oblige

Melisandre is trying to ensure the human race survives

I don't think Jaime should be hated for breaking his vows given what Aerys was but because people think he did it to increase his family's position, influence and power remember he was young and stupid and as one of the world's greatest warriors almost never needed to actually use his brain and think like most people so it's somewhat understandable he hasn't overcome these shortcomings until he lost his hand and saw his sister for what she is

Renly like Cersei and Robert would spend so much on clothes and tournaments not what is best for the realm, extrajudicial execution Westeros taboo maybe but what is best for the realm

Gendry has what it takes to be a great warrior BUT

Edric at least has a proper education and we do need the tedious minutia of governance unless like Conan he's naturally cunning

Sansa until she got cold hard taste of reality thought all adults were as honorable as her father, she thought the real world worked like a fairy tale not like the real middle ages

The main conflict in Westeros is between various warring families. The conflict is driven by the desires of the respective heads of households to further the political power and/or political independence of their houses. Family honor is practically an obsession, and the more ambitious lords want to take their families as far as they can (which is the Iron Throne). Everyone is concerned with furthering the ambitions of their families and factions, not what is best for the realm as a whole.

Ironically, however, the two most powerful men in Westeros are the ones that don't have families. Littlefinger has no family to speak of, and Varys, as a eunuch, is physically incapable of having one. So their primary concern instead becomes the realm. Varys's behind-the-scenes machinations are meant to preserve the country, and to put the best possible ruler on the Iron Throne. In a sense, he sees the realm as his family...and he is just as ruthless in the course of protecting and furthering his family as any noble lord is. Littlefinger, on the other hand, has no ties whatsoever. He's solely in it for himself.

George RR Martin said that he originally planned to write a War of the Roses novel but decided against it because everyone knows how it will turn out and that "the princes in the tower" will not escape.

In history, the two young children of King Edward IV, of the House of York, the Bran and Rickon of their generation if you will, were the heirs of the throne. Upon the King's death, Richard III presented a claim to monarchy citing the illegitimacy of the King's marriage to Elizabeth Woodville, since the King had already been secretly married to another before, an action which vindicates his claim. Richard III, then took those children hostage and locked them in the Tower of London, a traditional castle for raising royal children, the Dragonstone if you will. And then the Princes vanished...an action which eroded much support for Richard III, presumed culprit, and placed Henry Tudor as the next best claim to the throne, a Welshman who flew a Dragon Standard on the Battle of Bosworth Field. The mystery of these disappeared Princes is disturbing for many reasons. If Richard III killed those Princes as is generally believed, he brutally violated all norms of decency to claim the throne, showing a ruthless amoral urge for power that completely tramples over all notions of feudal honor and chivalry. If Henry Tudor or his supporters ordered the deaths of the Princes, as some Ricardians believe, than an Usurper maligned and tarnished a worthy and honorable man, framed him for the crime of the deaths of two innocents and rode over their corpses to lay claim on the dynasty that ultimately birthed England's Golden Age. Either way, the implication one gets is that those two children's deaths cleared the path for many men of ambition.

Robert Baratheon became King by conquest, by having a distant claim to the Throne through a Targaryen grandmother, Rhaegar even called him cousin to Jaime in his flashbacks. But as Tywin Lannister points out that the only real way to clear his path to the throne is to kill Prince Rhaegar's children since supporters will always rally around their claim. The result of Tywin brutally killing those children via Gregor Clegane is the lifelong disgust of the Starks and other houses of honour, the enmity of the Martells but also 13 years of a fragile peace. This peace is disturbed because Lord Eddard Stark refuses to kill children or allow them to die. Ned Stark informed Cersei because he knew that Robert in his wrath would kill Joffrey, Tommen and Myrcella, bastards of incest. By refusing to kill those children, Ned Stark fulfills the standards of decency that everyone adheres to but in the end, he gets killed by the very boy-king he wanted to spare. Both in the series, by the likes of Littlefinger, and by readers, people lamented Ned Stark's softness in wanting to "spare" the children. The deaths of children is what certain actions are defined and measured by. Moreover, these actions are framed by the context of society.
Theon Greyjoy presumably killing "Bran and Rickon", two miller's sons, is treated as much lower on the scale than Tywin Lannister killing Rhaenys and Aegon, why? Because Theon Greyjoy Turncloak Ironborn is an idiot while Tywin Lannister is smart, a man who does what he has to do, the lord of the wealthiest part of Westeros and who is careful to frame his actions around an acceptable pill of necessity and pragmatism which Theon fails to do. Tywin Lannister has toadies like Pycelle and Kevan making apologies for his actions, indifferent a$$holes like Robert Baratheon shrugging and accepting the Throne he fought for, while Ned Stark and others sulk in the corner about honor. Ultimately society will arbitrarily support and accept as Necessary Evil the deaths of some children while in other cases, the deaths of Bran and Rickon, even when feigned, is used by Stannis to claim vengeance in North and rally against Roose Bolton and Theon Greyjoy. It's not just what characters are willing to do, but the manner in which their actions are seen and judged by society in the proper context
Guest chapter 18 . 6/2/2017
more please
Zane Tribal Tyne Alexandros chapter 18 . 6/2/2017
*Smirks* The story is just too good to die. Thank you for another amazing chapter.
AUareAwesome chapter 17 . 5/23/2017
I know crossovers are hard. But this is a really good story and I'm starting to worry you've stopped writing this one. Please don't give up. I'm rooting for you.
LittleNK chapter 17 . 10/22/2016
Thanks for the update, I've been waiting for this.
TsknRaider chapter 17 . 10/21/2016
Good stufff.
Zane Tribal Tyne Alexandros chapter 16 . 8/7/2016
I wonder... Could there be a way to send Joffrey to Ivalice and make it look like he perished?
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