|Reviews for A mother's touch|
| MalachitePeridot chapter 22 . 7/14/2016
I gotta say, this might just be the most original adaptation of Dragon Ball I've ever read.
Over the years I've read several stories like this where Bardock or Raditz come to Earth to reunite with Gôku when he was a kid.
I even read a story once where Vegeta, Nappa, Raditz, and Goku himself, or Kakarot as he called himself, come to Earth to collect the Dragon Balls and end up kidnapping Bulma while she was on her adventure of finding them.
But this might very well be the first ever story where Gine comes to Earth. At least it's the first I've ever seen.
I always did think Gine would've been a pretty interesting character if she'd been introduced into the series.
I have a few suggestions for how you may continue the story if you don't mind regarding Ranfan. Now before I start, I'd like to say that I did get the initial idea of this from another story called Familial Rejection by Yaji's Girl who's an amazing author by the way. I'd seriously recommend reading some of her work. And after reading it, it actually made quite a bit of sense.
Basically, Ranfan and Colonel Violet, yes that Colonel Violet!, are cousins. And their great-grandmother was Fanfan. Their great-grandfather remains uncertain but it was definitely implied that it might've been none other than Master Roshi! Who, at least at that point, had remained unaware that he had any children, let alone grandchildren.
Given that you've already covered a fair bit of Dragon Ball already, I assume that you probably already know who Colonel Violet and Fanfan are, but in case you don't, I'll be sure to send more information later.
The reason I think this should be incorporated is frankly because I liked that story so much. Plus as I said above, it actually does make a lot of sense. I always thought that Fanfan and Ranfan looked way too similar for it to be a coincidence. And as for Colonel Violet... Well, she's a total badass. The only CONFIRMED female member of the Red Ribbon Army and one of the few, if not the only known member, to escape without dying or getting locked up. Dr. Hero doesn't count since he did end up dying, twice.
This brings me to my second suggestion. Colonel Violet/Hasky. Now before I continue let me just confirm that this idea is femslash. If you have any problems with this idea then you're welcome to disregard it, although I do hope that you'll still have Hasky in this since she's another awesome character.
Finally here's my last suggestion. combining Dragon Ball GT with Dragon Ball Super somehow. Now I'm not ashamed to admit that GT has always had a soft spot for me. I know a lot of people give it shit. But I always liked it. It introduced Pan who was hot. And Baby, who I think is one of the most underrated villains of the series.
Malachite - Jasper, Lapis lazuli - and Peridot
| RoseBloodmane chapter 16 . 7/2/2016
I think it could have used more work. To say the least they both held back. Neither of them used the Kamehameha Wave and Gine could fly which means she could fly whenever Goku tryed to hit her. Technically I don't think Goku would been smart enough to come up with that trick he did. I also think that his mother would have figured it out because she's technically smarter. The whole thing was kind of lame really. Even the fight wasn't really interesting at all.
I think my story will be a little bit more entertaining or at least I hope it will, but i'm doing it on another site so I might or might not put it on here too. The Site I'm talking about is wattpad. I'm making a few stories One series and one original. Dragonball Destiny Awaken and Dragonball Z Destiny Awakens are the Series one i'm making. The other story is called Legendary Daughter Of Kakarot.
Anyways story was good and all, but I wanted Gine to win and on top of that I wanted it to be the Finals not the simi finals that they fought. I was hoping Gine would beat the tar out of Master Roshi.
| drift.king8 chapter 22 . 6/24/2016
Can't wait for chapter 22
| Guest chapter 22 . 5/28/2016
You said you close about 1 year ago .
When will we get a chapter
| Guest chapter 22 . 5/28/2016
Ox king is implied to be part demon.
Humans in dragonball could each have a unique ancestor for all we know.
Tien's clan were descendants of a Cyclops like Alien.
| max chapter 22 . 5/16/2016
| Guest chapter 22 . 4/24/2016
Ox King isn't a demon. He's just a freakishly huge human.
| Guest chapter 22 . 4/5/2016
Ox king being strong is Beilivble... Fasha must of trained him to an extent
Also Gohan and Goten would be almost 1/4 Human with demon blood.
Gohan and Videl daughter would be Half Saiyan and half human with demon blood
| Guest chapter 6 . 4/2/2016
Oh the Humor! It is Grand indeed.
| Guest chapter 22 . 4/1/2016
What have you been up to?
| dr awesome chapter 1 . 3/21/2016
Will you add some extra words to every chapter you have or will you add some more awesome to it
| Celestia's Paladin chapter 6 . 3/18/2016
So if Chi-Chi is half Sayian... then Gohan and Goten would have a rather high chance of being born full-blooded. I do wonder what will change in the Z era with Chi-Chi being a half-Sayian.
| X chapter 22 . 3/16/2016
This story is gold please don't abandon it.
| hayabusa girl chapter 22 . 3/10/2016
Soooooo when exactly are updating, CANT WAIT CANT WAIT CAANNTT WAAAIIITTTTT loving this story, can't wait to see what happens next PLEASE KEEP GOING because I have noticed that you haven't posted in a while soooooo I hope you can get to it
| The fastest thing alive chapter 22 . 2/4/2016
Hey Chi Chi fan this story is so cool when are you going to do the next chapter.