Reviews for Princess of Konoha
death390 chapter 59 . 8/9/2018
I enjoyed the story though the princess is quite plank in this early part I’m hoping to see corrected in the second. I like the inversion on naruto and Hinata’s dynamic.
Sarcasm Dragon chapter 1 . 6/2/2018
I'm going to add my opinion on the use of Japanese in your story:

First, using words in Japanese which have equivalents in English is off-putting for all but weeabo. I get the desire to add every little bit of culture you can to the story, but sometimes less is more. This already being totally written, I don't expect you to go back and edit it, but that's the impression the story gave me. However, having each chapter having a Japanese term (with translation) would have been nice.

Second, if you're going to try and peddle culture in the story, don't be wrong. Your use of "teme" started out fine, but messed things up when you tried to make it plural. "temeera" may be an insulting way to refer to a group, but it doesn't mean "jerks" in the same way the English word does. "Naruto knew how to deal with temeera" isn't "Naruto knew how to deal with jerks."

Despite this minor issue, I'm going to keep going.
Blackchocolate1945 chapter 45 . 1/12/2018
I must say I really like your story, really. But there are just something that don't add up...
1. (to the the readers)
The way I see it, naruto's obsession on Hinata is similar to the one Hinata have of Naruto in Canon (for hinata, Naruto can do no bad and she seeks to become strong mainly for him, to stand by his side as equal... So for all you out there that say Naruto's obsession on Hinata is unhealthy, you're just being blind, obnoxious and hypocritical.)
2.(to the authors)
Naruto's fight against Hinata... Really ? He shouldn't have won, No way !
You really got us confused here ! First you make Hinata seems like this invincible warrior princess, then you make her loose like THAT. No ! That's not right... I'm sorry but not sorry, you sucked big time there.
Guest chapter 31 . 12/15/2017
This story isn't bad... It's just that I constantly find myself feeling like something is off...
I think that what bothers me most is Naruto's obsessive behavior towards Hinata.
It's one thing for him to scream about being hokage and realizing his somewhat logical dream but he develops this weird obsession about this girl he only saw once? That's just weird... And somewhat creepy. It also doesn't add up with the slightly more intelligent way in which he is described in this fic.
I just think that it would have been far more logical to have actually made Naruto and Hinata friends- real friends not just a one sided delusional "I shout it so you are" friend but an actual friendship with a background. Than it would have made sense for Naruto to want to become hokage or something so that he can openly interact with his best friend while getting the attention he seeks.
Another thing that is bothering me is the extremely slow pacing of this story... A lot of content just makes me somewhat bored and gets me to just skip whole paragraphs and sometimes even whole chapters.
In slight contrast to all I wrote above, this story is actually very well written and has an original idea and a very solid background to the world its set in.
If you like slower paced, well written stories that go into the more political and technical espects of the narutoverse you might like this.
All I wrote will hopefully be taken as constructive criticism... I don't mean to insult. I just want to show my appreciation for the writers by expressing my honest opinion. I really do find the writing to be good and the concept interesting it is just that I feel that there are somethings to be said about the execution that might be holding this story back.
Saga686491 chapter 59 . 12/6/2017
This is more of a comment about the whole story rather than just this one chapter. The Hyuga are more important, Hinata is more serious/formal, Naruto knows a very small amount of sealing, and Hinata is basically the MC. These are literally all the meaningful differences between this 536K word story and canon. I don't want to say don't read this, because that sounds harsh, but honestly you shouldn't read this unless you feel like rereading canon from a slightly different Hinata's point of view.
Larchmontsbeast88 chapter 4 . 12/5/2017
By the way MadMax. There is a line between constructive criticism and just being a dick.
Larchmontsbeast88 chapter 4 . 12/5/2017
Nine. Nine is his lucky numberI see what you did there.
MadMaxxCoyote chapter 39 . 10/6/2017
And the 99.99999999999% invincible god-child loses on a technicality without ever even being hit. How riveting. By which I mean boring as shit.

You know, Yeah I give up. I tried. This fic was pretty highly recommended, but I just can't go on. It's not bad per say, well written despite the somewhat poser-ish japanese, but its very...unenjoyable. Between Hinata being the nigh-invincible god-child who is love and WORSHIPED by all, being praised for her strength by Sasuke of all people when she's not even around, coupled with a seriously disturbed's just ridiculous.
MadMaxxCoyote chapter 37 . 10/6/2017
Thus continues the tale of the nigh invincible god-child Hinata.
MadMaxxCoyote chapter 28 . 10/6/2017
Yeah...Naruto clearly needs some psychological help. Obsession to this degree can be dangerous.
MadMaxxCoyote chapter 27 . 10/6/2017
Axe kicks are ones that are raised up, and then brought down with a chopping motion (hence the name) where the heel and/or the bottom of the foot is hoped to connect. So how can a downwards attack knock someone back into a wall?
MadMaxxCoyote chapter 26 . 10/6/2017
I got to say, it took a little bit, but you've managed to make Naruto into the most creepy and obsessive stalker that I've ever read about. I really wouldn't be surprised to see him cook up the idea to murder the Daimyo to show his "princess" how much he loves her.
MadMaxxCoyote chapter 24 . 10/6/2017
Decapitation with a kunai...yeah no. Not big enough, not heavy enough. You'd be there all day.
MadMaxxCoyote chapter 11 . 10/2/2017
Wow...even the Daimyo is lining up to gag on Hinata's knob. Because that makes sense...He's only the ruler of an entire nation. But a pre-teen girl from a ninja village is clearly a big deal.
MadMaxxCoyote chapter 10 . 10/2/2017
Man...I really hope this fic eases up on sucking Hinta's dick soon. detracting from the enjoyment.
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