Tears were shed this chapter. Youre way too good at making my heart hurt ;( . I really didn’t want. Namie revealing the truth to Sasori was shocking and totally unexpected - I wonder how this’ll play out. I’m very excited.

I nearly cried this chapter. I was starting to wonder how Kasuga would play into the future plot D: I liked that kid. I wonder if this will make Kakashi hate Namie and Obito. My heart hurts.

Okay, let me get this straight, she does something great and above and beyond the call of duty and the official response from the goverment is to Mind-rape her because she "might be a spy"?! This chapter was a major ass-pull to get her multi lives knowledge under scrutiny.

Going by that logic, that MUST mean that they've done that to the 3 legendary shinobi, and literally everyone in the clans.

I was wondering how I missed such a good story but now I know that it’s because it lacks romance (seeing as how the MC is 10(but even a side romance would help (KushiMina is not helping because they are background characters at this point))) understandable but I’m feeling like the Inuzuka could be a ML and they’re so irrelevant that I’m legit not interested in any story with them at the helm in any manner.

I knew he was gonna die. Perfect fodder material, helps with pushing the plot, and deals a blow to the MC.

I want her to eventually get with Kakashi

So hiroto and asuma are brothers? Is he konahamaru’s father?

Her attitude about friendships is a little odd to me. Great story though so far!

Is there any romance in this story?

YEAH CANON!

Suzume was the lady who taught kunoichi class, and Taji was one of the ANBU who helped deliver Naruto. We don't know the former's fate, but Obito murdered the absolute fuck out of the latter

Minato is six years old, and the war is about to break out? Let's check the timeline.

The Ame orphans were exactly five years older than Kakashi and his teammates. Minato was exactly five years older than *that*. This sets things up pretty perfectly.

Jiraiya started staying with the Ame orphans near the tail end of the Second Shinobi World War. They looked to be about 5-7 at the time, and Jiraiya stayed with them for three years. At the low end, Kakashi/Obito would have been 0-2 around the time the second war ended, meaning Minato would have been about 10-12 when it *ended*. If he's six now, then it would have lasted for about half a decade, which seems... totally reasonable.

Well, well, well, author. Looks like you did your research :P

The timeline checks out just fine. Good work.

Incidentally, we know that the Third War broke out when Minato was at least a teenager (maybe 17-19) and officially ended when he was 23. We know the former because of the Whorl oneshot. We also know that Minato canonically died at the age of 24.

I'm always surprised by how well the Naruto timeline stands up to scrutiny. It seems disjointed at a glance, but it's surprisingly airtight.

All in all a good story. I think characterization, plot interactions (how ripples would impact the world), dialogue, grammar/spelling, and world consistency were all top notch.

Most of the main character hang-ups were fine early to middle of the fiction but really held the story back from doing something unique for most of the last half of the story. It had the same issue as soaps and comic books where nothing was allowed to change but the underlying reasons for that state became less and less understandable and justifiable. When you spend ten or more years immersed in a culture you’re going to adapt especially when you know the threat levels coming down the line.

That adapting and growing was a big stumbling block and (even if partially excusable) wasn’t the most engaging to read. I think the biggest issue though is the MC didn’t ever try to break down her problems into steps needed to reach her goals. “Get strong” is too vast a target and it felt she didn’t spend time figuring out the best ways to try and leverage what she knew for an advantage to growth or deal with enemies/challenges. A lot of her conflicts seemed to be more or less conventional when she should have been able to use jutsu to make situations more favorable. She always seemed surprised when with her education, training, and time to consider and consult with smart professionals a lot of the fights shouldn’t have blindsided her.

Narratively it would have been nice to see her come up with a few plans to deal with each station of canon, watch her pursue them, and then see how each fell apart, kind of worked, or succeeded (all for the same challenge). I think the Suna and Bridge arcs had the seeds of this but didn’t quite manage it.

She was odd enough her dropping little insights to those closest to her (generally not the yamanaka or her sensei) could have gradually opened their eyes to different issues. One of those once you see it you can’t unsee it sort of things. She isn’t in a courtroom or defending a thesis so perfect evidence is a pipe dream and hunches are perfectly actionable among friends and ninjas.

Anyhow, despite all the gripes there weren’t so many issues I dropped the story so I hope you were able to grow from writing this and you’ve been able to continue enjoying creating stories. Thanks for the adventure.

Felt a bit like a speedrun on the conclusion but I’ll take it over a did not finish. Even as a speedrun though the solutions and plots were well thought out. Though the obito actions seem out of character. Dude always struck me as having might guy energy and tons of loyalty so him flipping perspectives a ton was very confusing. Really just highlights how much you can accomplish when you get Minato and a few key others working with you.

It’s like she waited until 11pm the night before a project is due. I’m glad she’s finally working on it but everything is so much messier since she didn’t do any of the prepwork earlier. I would have expected body flicker or body replacement to have been a staple for her earlier since rockslides from explosions aren’t usually directed but she has terrible situational awareness for a ninja. I’m also glad she didn’t cheap out and bought hair dye for her disguise this time. I’m now hoping the last 13 chapters are amazing quality.

She’s really terrible. I don’t know why you keep giving her the idiot ball.