Reviews for Written in the Stars
Edav chapter 4 . 6/2
I over all enjoy your writing but my god your inconsistencies in the tense you are using is killing me. Pick one or if you did and just are making errors, proofread it or have someone else doing it. It bums me out that I can't read and enjoy your story because of one fixable, but consistent mistake.
Edav chapter 3 . 6/2
Your changing of past and present tense is killing me, please stop. I don't know why you would use past tense then two words later use present. You used pulled then used grabs. Make it pulled and grabbed or pulls and grabs.
Syk chapter 2 . 5/6
Like everyone else on here you just assumed the name Hadrian and Harry are connected. They are not. They have no relation to one another. This could have been easily verified by a simple google search. Instead you just assumed since everyone was doing it was right. Everyone knew Sirus black was guilty as well. All I need to say.
DeleteThis chapter 18 . 4/29
Delete this story, please. You obviously have 59 more stories than your underdeveloped mind can handle. Even just one might be a bit much for you, so probably just stop writing these until you pass grade school English class. That might bring you up to the average 5 year old's level.
Learntowrite chapter 3 . 4/29
Maybe you should learn to write before you post anything. God, this is hard to read. It's one thing that you don't know basic things five-year-olds are taught, but you can't even spell half the time. Delete this until you're older than what I assume has to be three.
Thoughtthiswasgo chapter 2 . 4/29
Wow, you almost had it. But you're actually too stupid to understand what tense means in a story. Pick one. It's not "he was relieved so he turns.." It's turns or turned. Pick ONE. E. They teach you people this stuff in grade school.
ClaireR89 chapter 18 . 4/18
ClaireR89 chapter 13 . 4/18
For a "relationship" jaina and Harry barely interact. They don't hold hands, kiss, hug they seem very cold
Attrix chapter 18 . 4/18
Still waiting on the next update on this story. Hope it will be in the near future.
dfcole chapter 18 . 3/22
Wonderful story! You are doing an amazing job with this plot. I can hardly wait for more!
ThedemonlordPingu chapter 18 . 2/25
Interesting. Are we going to see any custom ships for the empire? That would be cool.
ElementalMaster16 chapter 18 . 2/24
great chapter! reading this is a lot of fun :)

Calebros chapter 18 . 2/21
This chapter is not well written at all.
Also a colonel is going to replace a Grand Admiral? Are you nuts? You want someone who is the equivalent of a captain to suddenly be promoted at least by 5 ranks? And he isn't even in the navy to begin with.
Basically you want someone who has experience with a regiment (army) to lead all the fleets (navy) in the empire?
Haaaarrrrry chapter 2 . 2/16
His name is Harry



Say it with me. HAAARYYYY.

Learn the names of the characters you’re using. Hardian is a craptacular fannon name. Harry is the correct name.
FailedKeikaku chapter 18 . 2/7
well that went downhill... disney sellout here you come~
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