|Reviews for Ballroom Antics|
| UltimateCCC chapter 8 . 7/23/2014
Now that she's got the kiss she finally wanted from Ash since they were kids she's feels like this giant lift off of her and will do whatever it takes to bring back her man.
| Shiny Shiba chapter 8 . 7/23/2014
I'm sorry to say I only found this story now, 'cause it's an absolute hoot!
First, thanks for taking the time to be creative with setting up a plot. It feels like an episode of Pokemon, makes everything flow together entertainingly and also keeps things from getting stale. Believe it or not, the cutaways to Clemont are actually some of my favourite parts!
We know the main attraction, though, and that's been a heated laugh from the get-go. Ash has displayed only slight embarassment (which makes his sudden shift in character hilarious), so much of the laughter has come from Serena or other people talking about them. That's a good approach.
I said that the plot has kept things interesting, both by throwing you new toys to play with and in tying events together. But there are a few other suggestions I'd like to make so you could keep it varied:
- More throwbacks to their appearances. No need to describe them some more, I just mean a tiny things like saying 'Ash leaned his head on the shoulderpads of Serena's fine suit' rather than 'Ash leaned his head on Serena'. Just to add to the contrast. Your prose is great, though, so I wouldn't worry about it. In fact, I feel like I'm nitpicking for bringing this one up!
- Serena obsesses over kissing a lot. It was hilarious seeing just how desperate and easily set off she was by it the first time, but it's starting to get repetitive. Talk about other things! Have her think about holding Ash's hand, or bragging to people he's her boyfriend (or girlfriend?), or carrying him bridal-style or how nice his hair is or what other nice things he could put on, etc. I'm just throwing ideas out here.
- Ashley is fawning over Xavier and romance quite a bit, but otherwise she's not being very ladylike. Her dialogue in this recent chapter has felt typical of Ash, which makes sense, but it's not very fun. You could have some fun with it if you went full ham with how she behaved, looked or acted, I think. Ash Ketchum would never shriek at the thought of getting his clothes dirty, or faint at the sight of seeing a spider in his hair, so just how absurd would it be if Ashley did?
- More embarrassment! More! You tell us you're evil, and I double dare you to prove it.
I'd suggest you explore toying with Serena further, but you seem set to do just that if I'm reading the foreshadowing correctly. Either way, I love this fic, and I can't wait to read more! On with the next chapter!
| Justin chapter 7 . 7/19/2014
I am so bipolar about this story! I can't read it, but I have to!
| NGA96 chapter 7 . 7/18/2014
awesome! please continue!
| Panda-Chii18 chapter 7 . 7/17/2014
I love the story so far! Continue!
| Guest chapter 6 . 7/15/2014
I can believe this doesn't have more reviews! This is by far one of the best, and funniest, Amour stories on ff!
| UltimateCCC chapter 6 . 7/14/2014
Come on Serena! Defend your man by getting physical(the fighting kind not the other one) on Allie!
| UltimateCCC chapter 5 . 7/10/2014
I think it's time for Ash to bring out the heavy artillery and I don't mean the heels.
| Joltiria chapter 5 . 7/10/2014
Uh oh, Allie knows it's them. What's gonna happen now? I can't wait! An amazing story!
| aaqqwwss chapter 5 . 7/10/2014
Please, continue to finish this story before your other one. It is HILARIOUS! One line especially for me:
"She wanted to take Ash behind those bushes by Route 6 and do...do something!"
Haha! Actually fell off the chair reading that. Nice plot, unexpected twist, making them (Ash and Serena) switch sexes. Overall, good job!
| guywithglasses chapter 4 . 7/8/2014
I love your story. All the characters seem vivid and real. The story is like an actual episode straight from the show.
| Sweetie147 chapter 4 . 7/7/2014
This is absolutely hilarious! The times Ash dressed up like 'Ashley', he actually looked all right, surprisingly enough. And the cover of your story only proved it.
I can't wait to see where you're going to go with this!
| UltimateCCC chapter 4 . 7/7/2014
I swear either Serena will kiss pounce Ash before or after Clement is rescued.
| SwishingTails chapter 3 . 7/6/2014
I really like the story so far XD it's hilarious to see Ash crossdressing yet again.
| NGA96 chapter 3 . 7/3/2014
this is amazing! please continue :)