|Reviews for Wizard Kingpin|
| RyTheGuy chapter 28 . 4/25
This is shockingly good, sad it isnt finished
| Guest chapter 1 . 4/25
When are you going to finish your stories. I enjoy reading them and would like to continue to read new content to them.
| DreigoththeVampireGod chapter 11 . 4/22
Hey I'm quitting your story nothing against you as a author but with the review answer from this chapter it just eliminated and some of my favorite pairings again sorry
| rowenasheir chapter 28 . 4/10
Please update. Over six months have passed! Here is an idea:
What if HP keeps up with the terrorising of the Silly Islands and clears one for those disowned and families with werewolves. A town, with a good school (Remus?), industries etc. It makes a good pool for him to start a werewolf security company, construction company, etc. makes use of their strengths and builds loyalty. A small island for full moons, stocked with game and a good potion making company for those that use wolfsbane so they can stay at home! And less people bitten in the long run.
| G F chapter 28 . 3/31
almost a dozen books for one class?
Seven. Canon is seven. Why change that? And no, seven is NOT almost a dozen
| Guest chapter 25 . 3/31
Loss of mentality?
No offense, but I am continually reminded that some people have good ideas... and some can write. Most of the 'good idea' types should pack up their notes, outline, rough draft, or whatever, and hand them over to someone who will write FOR THEM.
Back to the 'to, too, and two' and 'there, they're, their' problem for just a second...
I bet you could put those options on a spinning wheel thingy, like games have, and just spin them when one of those word comes up, and be more accurate, by luck, than what the results of this story are. I swear, they must be wrong 100 percent in here, so, yeah, why not?
Again, no malice meant. If you can be right a third of the time, why not do it? Baseball players that bat 300 (out of a thousand, .300) make Millions
| G F chapter 23 . 3/31
Malfoy WAS man used to things going his way.
Malfoy was not a man that was used to things NOT going his way. But that's a double negative and doesn't work, either.
| G F chapter 21 . 3/31
Ginny is the ONLY girl Weasley. She doesn't have hand me down clothes. Part of Ron's jealousy is that HE has all hand me down 'crap' (in his opinion), and Ginny gets ALL new stuff, just 'cuz she's a girl. His life is sh**, and she's spoiled rotten.
Nope. Sorry. I aint' buyin' what yer' sellin'.
Why change the chamber to a 'walk in' corridor? just how big is your basilisk, in your mind. The Canon basilisk was SIXTY feet. And in girth? The top of its head, with chin on the ground, was six feet or so. That's like eighteen feet in circumference (remember pi).
A troll isn't even a threat to THAT basilisk. it ssounds like yours is a baby, maybe a foot in girth, and twenty feet long. So, yeah, maybe a troll club would hurt it. Still, speed, agility, VENOM, etc. I'd put my money on 'baby basilisk' over a slow moving, stupid, clumsy troll.
| G F chapter 20 . 3/30
Why is he 'messaging' his own nose?
Is that like, a text, or a tweet, or what. One letter. One wrong letter in one word, and the whole sentence makes no sense.
And THAT is why we proofread.
| G F chapter 14 . 3/29
I think Rita was 'idly' flipping the letter. Not ideally. And idol(ly) is not sword. Idolatry doesn't fit. She's not on American Idol, right? Idiosynchratically? Nah. Idiotically? That's just rude!
That's all. I'm tapped. Not the wordsmith I thought I was.
Idealist! No. Nevermind.
Eidetic! Hah! I wish!
I'll quit now.
Spotlight is one of those compound words. No one says 'spot light', they just don't know it.
Rita cackled. If she crackled, someone must be roasting her on a spit.
| G F chapter 11 . 3/29
But I DO need Severus here, in the castle. I have my way with him, meaning I imperius him to bend me over my desk, at least three times a week. Then I obliviate him and reinforce that with the lemon drops here on the desk. They're a mild sedative, mixed with compulsion draughts to make, people, want to come up here for 'playtime'.
Minerva gets her turn on Saturdays, and on Sunday I have Septima Vector bring all her 'toys' up here and she buggers me for hours. Quite delightful, if I do say so.
| G F chapter 10 . 3/28
WE'LL. WE'll. We'll. we will. we'll. we will
We'll talk about it.
We'll arrange dueling practice
we will, not WILL. 'will' is just poor pronunciation of we'll, (wull if you were Scotch) and it is not how it is being used. it's wrong at least once in every chapter, so... like, ten times already
| G Fawkes chapter 9 . 3/28
swing some of his business partners THEIR way.
WHY is there, their, and they're HARD?!
Their is possessive. Is it mine? No, it is theirs.
There is a location. There it is. Right there!
They're is the easiest. It is a contraction of they are. They are riding with us. They're with us.
Pretty hard to f*** up if you have half a brain.
I was gonna' say 'Google the d*mn thing', but I didn't have the heart
| G F chapter 6 . 3/28
I know compound words are the bane of the younger generations. Basically, with standardized testing, no one had the time to teach them for many years. Why teach them if they're not on the test. Teacher reviews were almost solely dependant on test scores, so why teach ANYTHING not on the tests?!
Compounds like ' broadcast' are learned conversationally, but you don't know how to write them. 'Broad' and 'cast' make absolutely no sense together, AND are incorrect to try. Cast is a verb, and broad is an adjective. You can use 'broadLY cast', the ADVERB form, like a net, but it isn't the same. Is it?
'Broadcast' can be noun or verb, and the meaning changes with how you use it.
My ex was a teacher. She was as disgusted with the 'system' as I was. I was never a good student. Changes in public education have 'dumbed-down' the curriculum so badly, I feel like an A student, now, in comparison.
| G F chapter 4 . 3/28
He didn't ask the balance of the Black vault, or properties for that family.