Reviews for The Red Queen
Verdant Mercury chapter 5 . 9/24
Oh I am happy we get some more differing views of the Grimm here. I like it!
Verdant Mercury chapter 4 . 9/24
Oh..okay. I like this. The whole thing on Ruby's history is neat. I rather like that Ozpin just wanted someone to say it. Also yes~! Jaune time. I was kinda hoping you'd do a bit on Jaune. Oh man, I am imagining how badly it would wreck him to find out what happened to Ruby.

Boy, wow. I like that you didn't show everything with Dinah. You left enough for the reader to imagine but also enough to understand what was happening. With her change, I can't help but wonder if it would be better to think Ruby was dead, and remember her as she was, or find out she was alive but realized her change. What a dark and stark change. I like it
Verdant Mercury chapter 3 . 9/24
I like your chapter names. I enjoy the mental image of a slowly darkening Ruby and a creature of darkness, forging a slight bond.

'People who would forever look at her and not see who she could be but what they wished she wasn't.' That line. Bow howdy that line. It sticks with you.

"It could tell that she was slowing shedding what remained of her heart" okay wow? How dare you? I didn't...ok well I did ask for these feelings but wow that line. It's so...like hot damn that hurts in a good way. Also Dinah, best Grimm in a bad way. I am super invested. Oooh Red Wraith. I am interested. The idea that Grimm have these sort of ideas, the continued words on their kind's evolution and views on humanity and the Faunus.

Ok u need to stop hurting me now. "The breaking of an old heart.' Why...why...bruh...Yang is still in anger grief. Oooh the Ursai. Am I detected a slight call back to her song?
Verdant Mercury chapter 2 . 9/24
Oh man, oh man. This Ozpin hurts. Like...for the greater good and all that jazz but boy howdy that hurts. Like man, he must've had to deliver some hard notices on MIA or KIA in his years but then 15 year old Ruby? That's rough buddy.

I absolutely adore fanfics when they show other viewpoints throughout the story. I am intrigued you went with Ozpin! Though I do love me some Ozpin.

I rather like her dream. It feels...dark but not over the top in it's contents. It's like her subconscious is still rebelling against the horrible trauma of the betrayal. I love it! I am so interested in this! Even if you never finish it! I am super happy I was able to read it. This is the kind of stuff that gets the brain inspired, you know?

And the Beowolf! I love that! Fantastic idea! Okay, enough half screaming in text. Y'know I feel as if this betrayal really brought that spark forward but I like to think grief, and loss left a mark (Red Like Roses Part 2. Have I mentioned that's one of my fav songs of all time?) and this all brought it up. I am intrigued on how you wrote it. Short, but it says volumes and gives interesting thoughts to the Grimm, especially the older ones and just how they perceive and hunt negative emotions.
Verdant Mercury chapter 1 . 9/24
Wow~! Okay, I typically only use this site for RP or stuff but wow I got a recommendation to read this and wow. WOW okay. I was a little hesitant of the premise, but wow. This is dark and I enjoy how you've written it. Perhaps, if Blake had been darker with her time with Adam, and if Weiss had been turned even more cold by her environment. I love it!

Ruby is no doubt my favorite character in the series, as she does hold a lot of grief as you can see in Red Like Roses PT II. Like wow it's nice to see that a bit explored in a darker fashion. I had no problem with figuring out where the movements of the fight scenes were.

And oh my goooooooosh. That description of Ruby. Awkward, so innocent in many ways in her appearance and description. Jaune Ruby BFF's is my favorite thing so I am so happy you included it in this. I am super curious on where you diverged but it's still really interesting either way.

The betrayal doesn't feel awkward or oddly placed. You made sure by your earlier paragraphs that we knew it was a darker timeline so to speak. It was heart wrenching when she hesitated on attacking Pyrrha and got hurt for it. You conveyed her confusion very well, like an innocent worldview being shattered at once and the one who held it being unable to connect it all together from the sheer shock of it all.
beast5200 chapter 25 . 7/13
This was a perfect ending for a magnificently interesting story. It was bitter sweet colored in every shade of gray. Perfect for the tone with a promise for a sequel. Well you have me hooked. With a very believable and somehow lovable Dark!Ruby. I just dont quite have the words to describe how much I loved this story. It is so good and I just want to thank you for putting your heart soul and compassion into this project.
Thank You

-beast5200
DracoBrony chapter 25 . 7/11
sequel?
Basket in a Nutcase chapter 9 . 7/9
*vibrates in anticipation*
Basket in a Nutcase chapter 4 . 7/9
Hooboy, this is getting GOOD
Basket in a Nutcase chapter 2 . 7/9
*leans forward in seat, eyebrow quirked in interest* Go on...
Nagaichi chapter 25 . 7/4
This story was awesome!
beast5200 chapter 2 . 7/2
That last bit of the Grimm's thoughts has got me so pumped I might accidentally read this whole story iin one day. This is so good and only promises to get better.
Funnelweb chapter 12 . 6/25
I'm enjoying this story, and it's stayed consistently written well, but there's something kind of boring about it. I can't put my finger on it what it is.
Funnelweb chapter 3 . 6/24
I was very skeptical of this at first with how OOC everyone was. I'm glad I gave it a chance though, and I like where it's going a lot. It's written well!
Oh well chapter 16 . 6/1
Bitch move Ruby. That dude defended you, and you cold blooded executed him. Damn, not cool. The girl was mean, but still, she was just being cautious.
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