Oooooooh. Let me make a prediction:
The black kit tries to fight Palepaw, Palepaw wins, but let's the kit go, and they become friends.
Maybe I'm right.: D

It's good!
It has a few mistakes, however. If you'd like, I can beta you.

This is a great story with potential! I can help you edit it to make it better.

it was as good as my poop!
5 stars!

I like it so far, only a few gramer mistakes thought,
Again, keep up the good work

is was oak.

I loved it! though it was sad, it was well written!

Nice, you just need to correct some spelling, grammar and punctuation errors. :) I would suggest having a beta reader, so that your fanfic will have lesser mistakes. By the way, you need to capitalize the first letter after a full stop, a question mark or an exclamation mark. Hope you update soon!

Good so far (:
Just a few pointers

1. Capitals. Capitalize every Proper Noun and beginning of a sentence
2. There are specific words for present tense and past tense
3. There are a few run-on sentences. Those can be fixed with a comma here, or period there. Don't go overboard with punctuation though (:
4. Use spellcheck if it's available. Spellcheck is every writer's best friend
5. Try finding a beta reader

Other than that, good so far. Keep working at it, you'll be there in no time. (:
-Balloon

is vrey god! im lik plz do mor