Reviews for Walk on the Moon |
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![]() ![]() ![]() Very good |
![]() ![]() ![]() I really like this story! Its AWESOME! Can't wait till you next update! :) |
![]() ![]() ![]() Hehe fun chapter :) I'm already waiting Neji say something about how Tenten isn't worth Rei's attention... |
![]() ![]() ![]() Hi again. Here to review. I think you might have made a mistake. The line is "They don't call me a genius for nothing you know," she said with a coy smile. The mistake is that I believe you misused the word "coy." I say this because the literal definition of coy is to make a pretense of shyness or modesty that is intended to be alluring. Rei, in this situation, is not being coy, she is being arrogant, sarcastic, facetious, not coy. She is not trying to allure her aunt nor is she in any way being shy. This mistake feels familiar. I think I saw it earlier in the story, but just didn't comment on it at the time that I saw it. Since it popped up again, I felt I needed to let you know that you were misusing a word in your story. As you can see, I'm still reading and I really hope that Rei becomes a more likable character. She really pushes all my buttons. She really needs a punch in the face. I think it is the hope of future disfigurement that keeps me reading at this point. One other thing. You said her anger at being denied her advancement through the academy was a sign of being childish. I beg to differ. Being angry is a natural response. It is how you deal with that anger that is the sign of maturity. Granted, she all but started cussing at her father, but she didn't cry, she didn't wine, and she didn't hit anyone or destroy anything. In essence, her response was fine, the statement was wrong. Adults are allowed to become angry and frustrated when events do not turn out the way that they would like. Tis the end of my review. On to chapter 10. |
![]() ![]() Nice chapter. It is interesting to see SI that does think or care about the plot. Or how to make things better for everyone, after all people aren't saints. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Really liking this so far! I think it's actually great that Rei stays in her year. If she graduates too early, she wouldn't be able to really connect with the main cast. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Wow, this is a VERY interesting fic so far. I'm very much looking forward to seeing more and how this fic develops/ co iTunes. I've read a few SI's before but sadly I've never seen any finished (or if they were they were just basically overviews instead of stories :P). This fic looks like it has a lot of potential and I'm definitely excited to see where it goes. A Yamanaka as an SI is new (I think) from what I can remember I haven't seen any of them before especially a Clan Heir, the possession, mind reading and even mind shaping Jutsu are all tools at Rei's disposal here and I look forward to seeing how she chooses to use them. Plus it's VERY refreshing to see a SI that isn't obsessed with either Naruto himself or Konoha, ESPECIALLY one that plans to leave Konoha eventually (as that where they ALL start :P). From what ones I've seen I'm pretty sure almost all (or even all of them) had main characters that always stayed in Konoha in the end, whether through loyalty to the "Will of Fire" (propaganda bullshit), or if they hated it/ didn't care about the village then because of a sibling or loved ones loyalty to Konoha (usually Naruto as well though not always). I'm very excited to see where this fic goes. One question though; would you p,ease consider making this fic a Yuri/Femslash (if there even is a pairing)? I've seen that you have no problem doing with the idea from your other fics/ stories (which I found this from :)), so thought I might as well ask. Although it would be better if a non-Konoha or atleast an OC or non loyal ninja would be better. Another reason to tie Rei to Konoha, while possibly interesting would prevent her from turning into the character we're all waiting (for) and watching her become. Definitely looking forward to more, please keep up the Great work! Best Regards, Leez |
![]() ![]() This story has great ideas. For example the fact that the character doesn't want to be a medic. There are so many stories out there where the girl becomes the medic and la te da te da. It gets old so its nice to see something different. Also the fact the the village isn't exactly the same it was in the story gets rid of the "I know the future" argument for why someone can just do whatever they want. I don't know when you update but it seems close to weekly and I am really looking forward to the future of this story. |
![]() ![]() ![]() wahhhhh! SO AWESOMEEEEE! UPDATE SOOOOOOON PLEASE! I LOOOOVE IT! |
![]() ![]() ![]() Well, I would say, train for herself all-night and sleep at the academy If a teacher is bothered by her act, just state the obvious, she is bored in a nothing to learn way |
![]() ![]() ![]() I really like how this story is playing out. Can't wait for more :) |
![]() ![]() ![]() Fantastic! More please! |
![]() ![]() ![]() I'm dying to see what happens next! Please post the next chapter soon! |
![]() ![]() so far looks interesting. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Yay your fanfic is really nice! Keep going with it! |