|Reviews for The Unrelenting Frozen Seas: The Journey|
| Nameless chapter 18 . 12/7/2021
tl;dr Does this story buff the PJOverse at the expense of the HPverse? Definitely, but because its logical to do so. Does it do too much for it to be enjoyable? That's up to individual readers to decide.
A response to jmantsch0702's review:
He is right that the HPverse is utterly outclassed by the PJOverse. Unfortunately that's just the logical thing. Following the suggestions that he made shatters our suspension of disbelief (and as the authors our opinions on this matter is what matters most). If the Killing Curse can be blocked by mere normal matter, why can't Celestial Bronze block it? When monsters that are significantly more dangerous than Dementors are commonplace amongst the monsters that Heroes have to deal with, why should they be significant threats to a seasoned Hero?
The only point I think where he might have merit is where we have "11 to 13-year-old main characters acting smarter and wiser than [magicals]" but even then I would argue that it's more like the MCs are offering a fresh POV that the insular magicals are unfamiliar with. Though we probably went too far there.
Does this make take away from the HPverse? Definitely. Does it do too much for it to be enjoyable? That's up to individual readers to decide.
| jmantsch0702 chapter 18 . 12/7/2021
Gonna be honest I really enjoyed the sorry... that was until you just trampled over the Hp universe really disliked your portrayal of Magical vs Mythical with magical rules and universal constants being completely disregarded in favor of Mythical ones so whist I personally would put your fic into A-rank (A - F) for your portrayal of the Percy Jackson universe I would put your blending it with the Harry Potter universe into E-rank however. Magical treats are brushed aside because they apparently don't matter and as a Harry Potter fan that hurts. You could have used it in interesting ways with the killing cure being something that the mortals came up with to kill the gods and that is one of the main reasons why they went into their own form of Hiding but no celestial bronze blocks it. Dementors, in the HP verse immortal beings that suck out the souls of people and make them feel absolutely miserable by calling upon the worst memories they can remember, something that should have been a major threat due to the traumatic experiences our Heroine encounters within the story, get brushed aside and killed by celestial bronze because why have a major magical treat in the story. Occlumency is something that could have been an interesting plot point, some wizards just can't be misted because their minds are protected how do we deal with that, but it is only minimally effective in the story and comes overs a token gesture to the practice even existing. Also, magical people are almost always depicted as ideots with 11 to 13-year-old main characters acting smarter and wiser than them. Essentially, what it feels like to me is you using an Oc with the original last name Potter to keep the interest of the Harry Potter fans whist you ignore the rules of the Harry Potter universe and trample over everything magical only used to give Oc Potter a magical powerup. Mythical parts are good though.
| jmantsch0702 chapter 8 . 12/6/2021
Ass a heavily dyslexic person I just want to point out to all readers that NO the words on the paper do not move around for us in real life this is only a story element I may be unable to write the simplest words correctly but I can't change the laws of the universe
| ArachnidHiveMind chapter 4 . 11/18/2021
Well I’ll be damned…. you almost made me cry…. that’s actually an extremely rare event, and I fantastic commendation of your skills as a writer
| Nameless chapter 8 . 8/8/2021
A response the guest reviewer whose reviewers are full of a faintly condescending "hey author" vibes:
1) Rhode is *supposed* to be unlikable to a degree, though I think to what degree is up to the individual reader. That said to declare her completely unlikable as you do is an extreme stretch. Her unlikable qualities are supposed to things she grows out of as part of her character development. We aren't in the business of writing Mary Sues. If we make a character, no matter how OP, it will have flaws. Plenty of flaws. Just like Rhode does.
2) The story being laser focused on Rhode is a choice on our part. It's how we write our stories. Considering this is how Rowling wrote her stories as well, I do not see why this is an issue. In my opinion, your dislike of this stems from your extreme dislike for Rhode as a character.
3) Rhode's Hogwarts' life is boring and she is OP for the setting. This is again intentional. The whole point we make by doing this in TUFS and our Heroineverse stories as a whole is a counter to a trend that was all the rage when we started these fics of writers applying the no limits fallacy to wizards and making them somehow powerful enough to challenge characters from other IPs empowered by literal gods like say the Riordanverse. Our fics exist, in part, as a response to show that if handled true to the their IPs' canon, just how weak Rowling's wizards really are. It's why we routinely end up having to buff the wizarding antagonists immensely in all three of our stories to even make them a threat to our protagonists.
4) The story is without tension. To be honest, this is a sign of your impatience more than anything else to be honest and being unable to keep reading till the story ramps up. Considering the whole story and its sequel is published already, I can't see this critique as anything but invalid. Now, if you said that the story was ramping up too slowly then you might have merit. But you didn't, so...
Or perhaps you're just misinterpretating the story entirely. If you read the story carefully, you'd note that the true focus of story is on the Riordanverse side of things. As such the Potterverse aspect is just a place for Rhode (and our other Heroines) to essentially grow out of. Think of it as a tutorial stage before they enter the main game as it were.
P.S. On a note completely unrelated to our writing. It is kinda insulting to keep referring to us as "writer" when our handles are very clearly indicated in the fic. The failure to use them when you are clearly attempting to address us is just rude and that alone severely undermines your arguments. Since I do not expect the discourteous reviewer who left that review to read this, this is more a word of advice to anyone else who might read this and feel like dropping on anyone's story.
| Guest chapter 8 . 8/8/2021
I decided that I dislike Rhode, author. She's too much of a surly douche under her entertainingly rebellious shell. Would've been better if she was a more shallow character, which is kind of a novel situation. And the narrative is laser focused on her; everyone else only gets tiny bits of spotlight ever since Thalia, she has no friends at Hogwarts to distract from her unlikability and life at Hogwarts is just too dang boring compared to her adventures on the run. Not to mention she's WAAAY too powerful for HP plot, she's got a good shot at winning OotP bossfight right now.
All this adds up to an unappealing story, despite the obvious high skill you got at writing it, author. I'd've liked to keep reading for your prose skills but can't handle a disagreeable protagonist on top of a tensionless plot.
| Guest chapter 1 . 8/7/2021
Author, are you aware that you put a flashback inside a flashback? Because you did.
| Yub chapter 3 . 7/9/2021
Oh my fucking god that dagger is what Luke uses to stab himself when he is possessed by Kronos isn't it?
| Guest chapter 6 . 5/14/2021
Rhode should believe more than anyone there that names have power, being from a world where they literally do, so it’s unrealistic she’d say Voldemort’s name so causally. Although his name doesn’t carry any literal weight like some Greek beings, she should still believe it does.
| Guest chapter 18 . 5/4/2021
Through this first book I've seen 3 references
Gaige referencing pinkie pie from my little pony with her
"Cross my eye, hope to die, stick a muffins in my eye"
I also saw Rhode with frozen "the cold never bothered me anyways" and one other I forgot which was between these two
Amazing so far and looking forward to more
| Kitsune Obsessed Freak chapter 4 . 4/21/2021
I did cry at the ending of this chapt'r of thy st'ry.
thee has't a talent f'r the art of the writ w'rd
| ElyseSyrova chapter 12 . 4/18/2021
Err... Don't ALL the students up through 5th year have multiple quite sharp knives as part of their required school supplies for their Potions class? How can one student be punished for having a knife if all of them do. Also, the professors offered no indication that they could prove the one Rhode threw was, in fact, hers. Therefore, punishing her for not having a knife makes even less sense than punishing her for having one. Less sense than even wizards manage most of the time...
| weirdhead chapter 17 . 11/20/2020
Don’t know this. I'm astounded, but would Snape open up?
| weirdhead chapter 12 . 11/20/2020
Wrong. Wrong. Wrong.
It is unfair. Challenges of second year is getting ended so quickly. Bassilsk should have had those powers. (It could have been claimed that this is another breed of monsters, after all.) Snape was a master occlumens at the point. I get it you’re not much of a snape fan, but its unfair for him to say he lost his cool by panicking for a little snake. If he lost at sight of Voldemort...one dead Spy. You could have done it with Remus Lupin, which is Snape's one of worst moments. They should have known the parseltongue talent, due to being Poseidon’s daughter, most likely she could speak with sea serpents. I must say, Rhode's wizarding world adventures aren’t that entertaining cause they haven’t faced much of challenge. Voldemort must be a demigod, so Rhode face much of challenge.
| weirdhead chapter 11 . 11/20/2020
Well...frozen seas can mean another thing too...I don’t like it much, snowflake!
And how come wizarding world didn’t have much demigods? Wizarding world is connected to Hecate, so how do they don’t know about their roots? At least Dumbledore should.