This is a really rough start, and you set yourself up for it.
Book one was good and interesting. Writing was a bit rough, but clearly you know that; Book two cleaned up a lot of the technical writing issues I spotted. Book two was great in many ways, you developed the themes and deviated from cannon in interesting ways. Your old blog seems to be gone, but I can understand why you felt the need to remove Hermione. Probably too much puberty talk, but hey, he's 12.

The issue I have is this was really a relationship centric fiction, and you set up summers as important time for several relationships (Lisa and Selene in particular), and we just spent 5 chapters and burned 3 months with nothing but an angst fest instead of developing any of them. Harry,. who before this made huge progress in opening up to people reverted back to pre-book1-chapter1 levels of distance, and we didn't even do much to develop Sirius. I'm not saying Hermione's death shouldn't be traumatizing, but it needs to be in a way that develops Harry, not regresses him.

In short, I'm 5 chapters in and not seeing anything that made the fic enjoyable for the first two books.

Thanks for another great (re) read. Nicely done series. I hope your original writing is working out well for you. Also hope you find your way back to this series at some point.

You put the wrong name for Daphne's father. You put Danielle instead of Nathaniel

I'm glad I didn't read your trash . You killed off Hermione like you own the story . Nothing but trash .

not really an interesting plot in this part, i'd say. And all those other chars' PoV...

and why didn't he understand from all those effects that it was dementor incoming? At least get into your animal form.

what a blindingly splendid reappearance! /sarcasm

why were the dementors forwarded towards Hogwarts while there's even no "being hunted down by Black" Potter?.. Maybe better put those to Diagon Alley that way, lol?

somewhat way too much text about his abandoned friends and the pursuers. And Sirius is sorta...submissive.

why not assume that there's been just a usual exotic animal trader with a jaguar? Aurors really are that bored and how come they don't check every animal as to see whether there's an animagus among them... And yea, omygod, they've unexpectedly found that woman-neighbour, what a coincidence!
And not really seeing any reason so far that his mother's wand should reject him now. Pretty shameless, I'd say.

the Flamels had just stopped associating with Potter and warded against him or his owl? Or why then not ask his opinion about the diary.

Susan should be part of Harry's harem and carry on the Bones name as well

Do hope you will turn Harry around...otherwise he is for a lot more pain and heartache...and so is everyone else.

you mean that's why quit she quit being the minister for magic not prime minister they don't have those in the magical world.

is it so hard to figure out he used magic to know when someone is at the door damn magicals are dumb