|Reviews for A Long Way from Home|
| kira444 chapter 5 . 4/29
Is the revamp still on?
| Beowolfalien chapter 2 . 4/18
I forgot how badly written this was.
| Rikudou Naruto156 chapter 3 . 4/17
I'm sorry, but naruto after the war arc in base could lift way more than 300 pounds. Hell even as a kid he could lift more did you forget about the raw strength the dude holds inside of him. His punches alone are no joke he was able to smack gaara in jinchuuriki mode around like a fucking ragdoll. The same gaara who was able to tank a curse mark chidori from Sasuke who at the time was at least hyper sonic, which at least is 15390 km/h a average chidori delivers 200 kilojoules, a curse mark takes that up to 500. the sheer pressure of a chidori was able to bust through numerous of walls. Sasuke in total delivers a 7. 695. 000 kilojoules, or 5675.540738688 amount of force. This amount of force. The amount of power in this is equal to 1200 elephants or less in one hand, if I were to downplay them and just say a basic chidori is five kilojoules and a level one curse mark is 15 joules. Than the amount of kilojoules would be 239.430, or 176594.5054014 amount of force. That would be equal to at least 25 elephants in one hand.
The naruto verse is a very powerful verse in their own right just because they are not flexing their power doesn't mean they don't have a lot of it. They mainly sue skill with power on the side.
| Guest chapter 2 . 4/5
sugi un falos
| BullC6 chapter 1 . 4/4
I mean why would you write something from the cannon verbatim. I can understand a couple of scenes to usher Naruto into another world but not an entire chapter of over 5,000 words. There was barely anything that even suggested that you were veering off the original plot. That is just not your own work if you copy entire episodes onto your screen. I normally never bash writers but I really hate when people dont put in their own unique work. I hope you can actually type your original thoughts in the next chapter.
| sadark chapter 4 . 3/26
whats the limitation of Creation of All Things Technique?
why can he give then chackra network but cant give them theirs x-gene back or give then others?
| sadark chapter 3 . 3/26
He could have said that his eyes are his mutation but the rest (jutsus,sage mode, etc) are skills he gained because he learn the mystic arts like Dr Strange, there are all kinds of magic in Marvel and not many people would doubt his word after all he was brought to the institute by Dr Strange ,a world knowmagic user.
| sadark chapter 2 . 3/26
i dont know why but i feel that Naruto is being too trustworthy, or has he always been like that?
it has been years since i read anything about Naruto.
| Stone Shield chapter 20 . 3/25
Ironically, "time-travelling redhead" doesn't narrow it down all that much. At least two people fit the bill.
| brokenstrings001 chapter 1 . 3/20
Paragraph mix dialogues. So hard to read, so irritating.
| DarksiderForever chapter 2 . 3/15
he can't learn English in ten min. even with Stephen Strange stuffing the knowledge in his head
| Prodigal Knight chapter 1 . 3/13
I only saw this story today, but thought I'd still post my review from the first chapter.
I think you have a great concept, and hell, you're going to cover some of the best arcs in Marvel comics, but you're missing some grammar ground rules. Dialogue always starts a new paragraph. Use a comma between the dialogue and the tag line (the words used to identify the speaker: "he said/she said." While exclamation points or question marks in place or commas are technically still grammatically correct, they REALLY shouldn't be followed up by a tag line. We should be able to get from context that a character is shouting. Show, don't tell.
Speaking of which, you're missing . . . well, I'm not sure what the proper word is for it. Context? Content? Filler? You have hella dialogue, and not enough description of the world. I've watched and read all of Naruto, so I'm imagining the same background as that, but that's not the point. It's like you have one dimensional stick characters on a blank canvas. I don't know, some of my favorite Marvel fanfics are Meinos Kaen's 'No Reading,' Stargon1's 'Heroes Assemble,' Kenchi618's 'Extraordinary Times,' and Morta's Priest's 'Wand and Shield." The way they write, I feel invested and weighted in the worlds created.
I'd be willing to lend a hand with the story, I know Naruto exceedingly well and have OneDrive, but I'm only decent with mainstream Marvel.
| asdfgbvcxz3355 chapter 2 . 3/9
| brokenstrings001 chapter 22 . 3/7
tldr, youre rewriting and you wont be able to finish it.
| zen-aku the spirit of the wolf chapter 22 . 2/28
of course can't wait to see what the revamp! don't forget to update so we can start reading.