I still think David asking to be killed didn't make much sense because he said he has a family. To me, it just seems like he would value that over trying to escape his own misguided guilt. I guess that's just a difference in my interpretation.
This was a really interesting explanation for why they act the way they do. I found Freddy to be one of my favorite characters because of his complete belief in the "rules" and his twisting of them. It's like Javert in Les Miserables. And, well, it's sort of a given to like Chica, isn't it? This is beautiful, seriously. Thanks for writing. I'm not an FNAF fan at all, but I enjoy the depth you've given to the characters.

You're pretty good at describing the murderer's thoughts and feelings, as well as the gore. (Is that a good thing? I think it is. ;) I like the repetition of the
first line at the end of the chapter. It helped show how the tables were turned.

At times the flow of the verses were off. It seemed like there were just too many syllables in some lines and not enough in others. I like reading things aloud in my head, sort of, to test the rhythm.
For example, I think the first verse might flow better like:
Five little children
Trying for high scores
Got stuck at the boss
And then there were four. (Not that great, still.)
But yes, it was an awesome idea to include them! The overall mood you built was great. Reading on...

I love this story! It is so wonderful, and I think you handled everything fabulously! There were no flaws as far as I'm concerned! Please keep writing this story!

What an ending. Original, unexpected, and beautifully bittersweet. Truly... ignorance is bliss. I loved David's tale, and how you managed to connect this with FNaF 1. For a story that isn't that long you managed to pack it with character development and feels. But as you said there's still a little open space left with Basil and Chris, and how exactly they fit into David's life.
I see you really want to connect with your readers, and that's amazing. I'm quite tempted to continue this, but I can't say for sure I will. I'd like to get my main story done before giving you a definite answer and that might take quite some time. But if you'd let me do it, I'd be honored.
Anyways, thanks for that beautiful story and happy writing.

I'm gonna be totally honest here: it's the first time in months that a fanfic made me cry this much. I mean, chap 3 made my eyes moist, but this?! I was weeping like baby. I don't remember the last time I snuggled my blanket so tightly.
Remember what I said in chap 3? That it's a shame you killed off David so quickly? Forget that; I see now that making them remember their happy past is much more painful. Man...you're good. So please stop being so damn hard on yourself! Seriously, you've got an amazing ability to invoke so many feels in a relatively short story that has become one of my favorites.
I'll finish this tomorrow; I'm way too emotional right now.

Wow. That was... yeah. I really didn't see that coming. The ending was really powerfully written, and I'm not ashamed to say that I shed a tear.
As much as I liked the way you wrote this, I think it would've been even more powerful if we had gotten more time to bond with David, and get to know more about him before he died. Still, this was incredibly moving and I congratulate you for challenging yourself.

Boom. BOOM! That's what my mind did when I read this story! Because, for the first time in over a DECADE, I literally could not bring myself to click off of something online. This was what did that! I'm just gonna lay it out there: this is the single greatest FNAF fan fiction that I have ever read, if not the greatest fan fiction at all! And this is coming from somebody that isn't even a fan of FNAF!

I would kind of like seeing a spinoff/sequel where Mike slowly becomes the Night Bird

I know you are still planning on making other stories but if you are going to do one can you do a chapter just to warn us?
I love this story and I would LOVE seeing a sequel (principally of FNAF 3 It is the only one that has an understanding story and has quite a bunch of "material" to use)
Well, see ya!
(I already commented here but I was a guest)

This chapter is beautiful...just beautiful.

I absolutely loved the flashback with Night Bird telling that story to the animatronics and how he let them decide who would go and who would stay. I also loved how you wrote the ending. The idea of having the reader choose if the ending was a happy one or a sad one can really make the reader think and leave room for lots of discussion. Personally, I think the ending was a happy one. The animatronics are probably closer than they ever were before, and they finally have that hope to carry one. Although I do admit, it is kind of sad that they still live in denial over Night Bird's death. As for more chapters? I say go for it! But only do it because you personally want to, not because everyone else does.

Keep up the good work!

(P.S. This is the most awesome FNAF headcanon I have ever read in my life.)

It's amazing how you write Freddy and Foxy in these last two chapters! Just the way how they think and see the world around them make them feel alive! Once again, I'm at a lost for words.

I hope to see the next update soon, but don't forget to take your time if needed. Keep up the good work!

P.S. Make up new rules, huh? I wonder what's instore for Freddy...

Understandable, but a bit of a confusing ending if I didn't read the little part at the end. Nice work

Sorry for errors!
I can't believe how this story changed my whole concept of just...just...so perfect, I couldn't hold my happiness and sadness reading that final chapter(or not?)!
Your talent for writing is nothing less than amazing and I am really thinking of doing an account just to follow you, your stories and Koili(another FNAF writer,You should check it!).I remember reading that story and seeing only 2 chapters and how I waited a week for the next surprise to your readers. That final part thought...I really wasn't expecting that, the fact that they scare the guards for Night Bird return is just something that i would never come up with!
AND THEN I almost cried thinking about that whole concept of the "happy ending" on your story and the "good ending" on Five nights at Freddy's 3,when (SPOILER ALERT) the kids finally stays in peace and are free to rest.(SPOILER FINISHING)I just can't stop thinking about how the animatronics would be finally happy with Night Bird again. Finally with all their efforts of scaring and killing night guards coming to a sucess.
I don't want to make that review longer and talk even MORE about that. So in a nutshell your work is amazing, you are amazing and I am expecting more fanfiction of FNAF(pretty pleeeease) with all of your amazingness(?)
So this is me! Always coming and Going!(Oh yeah, my sister likes your creativity too)

This is the most philosophical and heart-warming sob story I have read. Please never stop writing, you beautiful, beautiful person.

This was the saddest happy ending... I don't want it to end here, but you made it a really good end. Would be great to know what happened the time David was off... Damn, you made me shed a tear... Again...