Decent story. To be honest, I wouldn’t really mind reading a story about Amy going full Nilbog and having her and Vicky be the Queens of their city of Simurgh victims.

Damn. I've read a lot of dark stories, but this definitely takes the cake. Good work.

Wow. Seriously.

This is perhaps the darkest, yet incredibly realistic depiction of a Simurgh attack. Terrifying, fucked up in every way possible and downright creepy.

Even in the grimdark world of Worm fanfiction this story gets its own unique place. Would love to see more, particularly the ending (since the title implies they actually live through it).

This is almost painfully dark. The Simurgh sucks. Followed.

Wow, Taylor got hit HARD.

Evil Skitter trying to kill Dinah? Sick...

Also, congratulations with making sympathize with Coil even as you reminded me of his worst flaws.

Well...

That happened.

Further credit, this is probably the first time I've seen Noelle go up against the Simurgh. Which is funny, because I've seen her against Leviathan and Behemoth, but not until now have I seen her against the Endbringer that she has pre-existing rage for, and the one who she's most thematically appropriate to go up against. Don't think I've seen many Simurghed!Skitters before either, so that's also pretty refreshing. Endbringer attacks aren't something I'd wish on the characters in most cases, but I can't deny they certainly tend to be the most interesting parts of a lot of Worm fics, and yours takes place ENTIRELY during one. Very well done!

That is an EXTRAORDINARILY interesting path to take concerning Amy's issues. I've never seen it done like this. Amy screwing with Victoria's memories, but then thinking it's HER with the memory problems because of the Simurgh and how sheerly unbelievable it is to her that Brandish would change her attitude... I did not even REMOTELY expect that. That's quite the twist, props to you!

This might be the second most fucked up fanfiction I've ever read, congratulations.

I felt happiness and empathy and pride for Coil!? Good job!

The idea behind this story and the general prose is as good as always. But the dialogue between Amy and Victoria seems so cheesy and unrealistic that it really takes me out of the story. Not every line is bad, but there's enough of it to be a serious distraction.

I can't ever imagine Amy or Victoria from cannon speaking remotely in this way. At least not without being sarcastic or making it playful in some way. Lines like "There is a god... and she's right in front of me." "Yes. Yes. I love you. And your light. You're shining Vicky. Brighter than the sun and stars." and "That's the power of love and Light."

It sounds like they're trying to emulate a bad mix between Shakespeare and a romance novel with Fabio on the front.

I don't think there's very many people in the world who talk like this. Surely not high school kids, and definitely not Amy and Victoria from cannon. I it's fine to have a few terms of endearment. Maybe keep Victoria's saying of "I love you more than all the creatures of the Earth", because that was legitimately creepy given the context that she'd just had her mind altered. But having so many over the top exclamations of love and flowery descriptions of each other just doesn't work, IMO.

In any case, sorry to harp on this one thing I didn't like about the story, but it was nearly a deal breaker for me. If the next chapter wasn't a Taylor chapter, I probably would have stopped reading at this one. And I suppose everything I'm saying is just my opinion, so you can take it with a grain of salt. But I really do like the majority of the things I've read from you. And if you ever want someone to Beta your chapters for you before posting, just PM me.

Oh wow this is so fucked up I love it. You're an incredible writer I do hope you continue

Wow, its all sorts of messed up but I'm really liking the Victoria/Amy pairing. Its really beautiful and at the same time completely tragic. I can't tell if Amy remembers that she worked on Victoria's brain or if she thinks it was just a Simurg vision. Makes me really curious how the two of them will react to being told the truth if they are ever welcomed back into society. Will people think Amy did it or attribute the changes to the Simurg? Keep up the great work!

Yikes. This story is all KINDS of fucked up. Absolutely terrific, don't get me wrong, but still fucked up. And I have to wonder how Taylor's going to react if it ever occurs to her that, for all she's freaking out about how Grue and Bitch are acting about civilian lives in favor of their goals, she's doing a similar thing in keeping the truth of the building situation at the safehouse from the Undersiders.

The revelation that, regardless of what her intentions are, she just is not a very good person is going to bite her in the ass.