|Reviews for Fledglings|
| Brizzly chapter 58 . 11/2/2017
I Love this story so far.
| Copyrightdragon chapter 55 . 8/12/2017
Um, I'm assuming that the comma at the end of the last sentence means that you'd meant to write more...? Did you check over the chapter before uploading it because some may have gotten cut off.
| Anononn chapter 51 . 5/11/2017
I'm liking the story, just binge read up to here. I'm gonna admit, I'm starting to get lost between the groups of characters though hehe
| FlightfootKeyseeker chapter 5 . 4/27/2017
I like how Pleo's questioning Nida's story. That critical thinking should serve him well, especially since I think there's more going on in that story about how and why the Cradle was formed. It makes no sense to mark the descendants of the Pokemon that caused the apocalypse, unless you want those Pokemon to be shunned for something they didn't do.
| WyldClaw chapter 51 . 4/22/2017
That was such an awesome chapter
| WyldClaw chapter 47 . 2/18/2017
Oh no! I bet once all those pirates in the town see pleo team traveller's gonna have a wicked tough time getting of of there intact
| Commenter chapter 8 . 2/5/2017
So we have pirates from Finland and Poland attacking a town in Spain? Then it is proven that they all live in Europe! I like this story already.
| Copyrightdragon chapter 45 . 12/29/2016
I've been following this story for quite a while, and just thought I'd let you know that I'm really enjoying all of the effort you've put in to building up this immense world, rich with it's own history, mythology, and plenty of characters (even if they're hard to keep track of). I'm concerned about the lack of growth (physically; emotionally I can tell that they've really come a long way) with Team Travellers, as they don't seem to be progressing commensurate with the danger and difficulty of their situation as they should be. Given that they're young, and the high-level enemies they're fighting, they should be growing more quickly than this, and if they don't soon, then their odds of survival will become beyond unreasonable. I understand that things up until now have been more or less a slow reveal to the true scope and depth of their journey, but it's unrealistic to expect this sort of grinding pace to go on forever (the story does drag in some parts) with no real growth on the protagonists' part. The fact that the fates of more and more Protectors are being revealed is really neat, and the different islands with their unique cultures are cool, but I think you should also keep in mind that writing out story lines for all of them is stretching it. Not only is that a lot of work for you and your beta reader(s), but also for your audience, and on a fanfiction site where the longest stories tend to be light novel length, there aren't a lot readers that'll be willing to keep up with it all. Might I suggest finding a good stopping point for this arc? Splitting this into different "volumes" could make it more digestible, and perhaps instead of introducing a lot of characters, you could develop some of the ones you have to be a bit more three dimensional, and therefore more memorable.
| gamerj14 chapter 37 . 12/18/2016
First was a Castlevania reference , and now the destroyed cabagge from Avatar XD, and I feel that probably there others but they elude me no matter how much I re-read.
It's implied that the Apricorn are use to hunt for meat ,torture/interrogation and to imprision criminals; the fact that so many are being made imply either a big commerce with them or something big going to happen somewhere...
Anyway I will be watching.
| gamerj14 chapter 43 . 12/17/2016
The Porygon Tutor say that the disk they are using have Organic dye that store the data.
That create a problem, while the organic dye is the most common (and cheap) used now ,they decompose causing corrupted date after years (in the best case escenario) of storage, so unless exist someone out there that somehow making new disks an other hardware to continue preservation of that data ,those disk are fragile relics that will break at the first sudden move, much less be used as they are intended, creating like this a plot hole ... unless this is a detail that you (the author) is putting in there on purpose and creating some implications within the story!
But if that not the case you must know that exist Disks that can resist centuries (maybe even millenia) in real life!, those are The M-Disk ,those use a inorganic dye that (assumed) is Rock-like and can resist way better than the standard Disk, perfect for long term archival purposes.
and of course there is the possibility that Porygon is wrong and he just say what first come to his mind and all TM are M-disc to begin with. :\
| Ralmon chapter 44 . 12/3/2016
So the "blue fairy" is one of the protectors. Interesting. Hope that this has come earlier though. The momentum has rather died. Constantly reaching out for that dangling carrots but not able obtain it for such a long time would naturally kill your interest of the said carrots. Still at least, I got one of the carrots that I was eyeing (and also, anyone who are able to continue reading to this point). But the only comment I could say after getting it is a weary "Finally!"
And after 44 chapters we learn about these books which is SUPPOSED to contain a powerful secret that could grant them victory. Three books. Three very difficult to acquire books. I don't know if I should be motivated that we seem to be going on to a new story arc; or maybe I should be demotivated that the story is getting even longer. (Assuming that it might take 44 chapter to acquire each book!)
The story is already at 367,107 words long. Comparing it to other 'door stopper' fictions that I have read:
Gullivers Travels - 107,349
Watership Down - 156,154
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix : 257,045
Anna Karenina - 349,736
The Lord of the Rings - 455,125
Oh come on! All of these fiction has told stories that are a thousand times grander but they are able to tell them in lesser amount of words. This story would clearly be longer than The Lord of the Rings, especially with the addition of the arc to gather the three McGuffins.
And why can't it just be one book! This story has gone on too long already and now they have to do the same thing three times? Then there is the possibility that it would all be in vain. Uh!
You know what? All of you readers and would be readers: BE WARNED! This story is ridiculously long for its really shallow, and relatively simple story. The characters barely develops. The mysteries doesn't pay off. The story questions are still not answered. 44 chapters later, nothing has been gained.
If you find enjoyment with, well go ahead; otherwise, I advise you to rather read the story I listed above. They told a far better story both in scope and depth, filled with more solid and interesting characters, has more intense conflicts and situations, and are already complete.
As for me… I'm out. I have been patient, following the story as our protagonist hops from one island to another; but it never pays off. Instead, now, we will have this generic adventure gathering three mcguffins. What is with all those island hopping then? And these mcguffins, I'm sure it would not pay too.
I already reach my limit here and I'm saying goodbye.
Good luck to the writer and whoever is still following this story.
| Ralmon chapter 43 . 11/12/2016
The plot intensifies. Characters are coming together to what could be hopefully the climactic act. A lot of tension and suspense. Hopefully this results to an actual plot development or a new arc instead of another link to the chain of escapes.
And… it is becoming so confusing. there have to be several dozens of characters by now. I just can't remember most of them. And the character just keeps multiplying! Specially when a lot of them isn't memorable or given anything to do.
Also, there are a lot of questions that have remained unanswered for a long time. Like: where are the other guardians? Have they woken too? What happen to the humans? Is the warning about the legendaries true? There is a large methology in the setting that isn't really explored. Instead all of it is sidelined by the rather typical cat-and-mouse-chase plot. There is just a lot of wasted potential.
Still rather OK but the story is getting encumbered by an extremely prolonged arc, numerous characters, lack of the exploration of the story's setup and setting and shallow plot. The story could have offered more given its length, setup and mythology.
| WyldClaw chapter 42 . 10/22/2016
that was such an action packed awesome chapter
| Ralmon chapter 40 . 9/6/2016
Oh well. And the chase continues.
…but this chase has been going on and on and on. When will it end? The story is very long and repetitive. Team Traveller just keeps moving from one place while repeatedly escape their enemies everytime. Maybe, the next place they go to, it is the same thing over again.
Oh my! This story has many good things about it like likeable characters and an expansive setting, but the plot might just be too long and repetetive. There is just no significant development in the plot or the characters. It is just a long game of catch-me-if-you-can.
| scourge728 chapter 10 . 7/16/2016
is that a freefall reference I see