|Reviews for The Vanishing Cabinet Of Time|
| Eagle-Eyes chapter 41 . 3h
Update as life allows
| tenga chapter 15 . 7/11
I realise it is highly unlikely that this review will ever be read by you, or that you'll post a new chapter, but having read 15 chapters I wanted to get my thoughts down.
That was pretty bad.
Partly it is the cliche ridden nature of your story, which makes it feel about as fresh, new and exciting as a pair of week-old underwear.
There is also the fact that everyone is a moron. Not only do they all blurt out all of their secrets to everyone all of the time, but they behave in stupid ways too. Harry and Hermione outright tell Dumbledore they believe he used the Imperius Curse on Hermione at a time when there was nothing stopping him from Obliviating them so badly they couldn't even remember each other's names. Instead of doing right by her son to gain her forgiveness, Snape hands himself in and gets himself sentenced to Azkaban. Amelia decides to protect Harry from Dumbledore, a 115 year old man so powerful he's regarded as something of a demi-god by the general public, by assigning a trainee Auror as his bodyguard, telling Dumbledore about it, and reminding him of Tonks' metamorph ability. There are many other examples.
Then there is Harry and Hermione deciding to remove Umbridge from the gene pool. A worthy goal, but they do it because she might go after Hermione at some nebulous point in the future. Not because of the muggleborn death camp she seemed to operate, accusing muggleborns of stealing magic (which I think is to explain how purebloods give birth to squibs, not because they just took the pureblood's wand. Harry disarmed Draco and took his wand in Deathly Hallows, does that make him a Magic Thief?). Punishing someone for a thing they might potentially do, and not something they have done, makes you the baddie.
Then there is Dan Granger's forced SAS background. To be honest, that was just ridiculous. For so many reasons.
Ragnok tells Harry that every goblin rebellion was caused by someone saying something mean. Well boo-hoo, goblins. A kid called me a name on the street the other day, I didn't organise a rebellion to kill his family and overthrow the government while we were at it. The goblins are immature, easily offended, precious little snowflakes who throw a hissy fit if someone says something mean to them? Is that the impression you wanted to give? Because it's the one you gave. Not to mention the stupidity of the whole 'Harry was polite to a goblin and so they all fall over themselves to help him in any way forever' thing, which is just insane, inane, and incredibly childish.
Then there is the whole repeated spiel of people realising Dumbledore set up all of Harry' life. The number of times I had to read the exact same discussion of how Dumbledore arranged the Philosopher's Stone traps, the troll, the basilisk, etc, was obscene. And it was stupid. If Dumbledore had done all that and clearly magically compelled his staff to go along with it, don't you think they wouldn't know about it? He would have taken magical measures to ensure they couldn't. Perhaps the Imperius Curse.
Which, by the way, doesn't work like that. If you change some important world building aspect like that, you really need to have a scene explaining the change to a character, because then the character and the audience can learn about it.
I could go on, but I just want to put this story behind me and forget having read it. My feelings about it can be summed up in one word - bleurgh. I hate not finishing a story, but I can't bring myself to keep reading this.
| squidsk chapter 41 . 7/9
Love the story hope your able to come back and finish it.
| lbwtv chapter 41 . 7/7
When will you post the next chapter
| The Similarities chapter 18 . 7/3
Before chapter 18, I had my suspicions about some aspects of this story being "inspired" by RobSt's story Harry Crow. Now chapter 18 just confirms it. The extraction of the basilisk and subsequently making HP achieve legendary status among the goblins, the goblins being honourable creatures, the Horcrux removal and transfering to a pig all occur in both fics. At least give some credit to RobSt.
| Wagasani chapter 1 . 6/26
OK, I tried, but this was so full of cliche that I was physically cringing. Rewrite the first chapter and I'll try again.
| ClaireR89 chapter 41 . 6/22
But but but. Come back :(
| ExceleKurokami chapter 15 . 6/19
You made a mistake in this chapter. Part of joining the SAS is rigorous testing, gun handling included. If machine guns 'aren't his thing,' then Dan would have NEVER been permitted into the SAS. You can't handle a machine gun, they boot you out of the training. Judging by what Dan said, he would have failed the Jungle training phase, which includes combat drills involving machine guns.
The whole SAS thing is annoying and stupid, it is making Dan into an Action Hero in a setting where such skills are virtually useless. It is like sending the Avengers to deal with a Scooby Doo mystery. Yes, they are smart enough to solve it, but their core skills are absolutely useless.
I made it so that Emma, or whatever you call her, is a former member of the British Lovat Scouts. Gives the military background to the Grangers, but it doesn't make anyone out into an action character in a story where Muggles can't really fight. Emma's primary skills are tracking, stealth and a slightly unhealthy dose of sabotage ability. She can fight, quite well in fact, but she's not going to be gunning gown trolls or anything like that.
| ExceleKurokami chapter 9 . 6/17
I always found Rowling's use of titles in the Ministry to be laughable, the most obvious ones being Amelia and Scrimgeour.
Amelia Bones is the Head of the DMLE. This means she's the top cop and other assorted things related to being the police chief. Meanwhile, Scrimgeour is the Head of the Aurors, which means he's the top cop and the police chief.
See the idiocy? May as well renamed the DMLE to the department of redundant redundancy, because they got two people with different titles, yet the same exact job.
I correct this by making Amelia the Director of the DMLE, meaning she handles the logistics that makes the DMLE run, no matter how pitiful the budget that Fudge grudgingly allows her, while Scrimgeour is still head of the Aurors, managing who goes where and does what. In a sense, Amelia is both Police Chief and the Accountant while Scrimgeour is a glorified dispatch officer. (to be fair, there is a lot of glorified trash in the Ministry. Half the Ministry could be fired and the only difference it would make is a sudden increase in available budget and possibly less red tape)
| ExceleKurokami chapter 8 . 6/17
This chapter, and the Tonks/Harry chapters, are what makes this fic worth reading! Verbal smackdowns! An adult witch perving on an underage wizard! The highlights of this fic! Utter gold!
| Reader chapter 3 . 6/17
Binns is a better teacher than Snape. A boulder with the potion recipe written on it is a better teacher than Snape. The damn textbooks are better teachers than Snape.
Quite frankly, it is hard to find someone LESS suited to be a teacher than Snape. Even that useless fop, Lockhart, was a better teacher than Snape. (if only because he was a walking, endlessly talking example of what not to do) Even UMBRIDGE was a better teacher than Snape, and all she taught was theory.
| Guest chapter 1 . 6/16
| MagicEater chapter 7 . 6/16
"Oh, to be a fly on her shoulder!"
What about a beetle? ;)
| Kerrion chapter 1 . 6/14
Why am I not surprised that most of these Harem stories are written by men ? Why do they have to write harry with 5 6 women ? Where did that misogynistic crap come from ? Smdh .
| morcheller chapter 39 . 6/11
Too bad they seemed to have forgotten their basilisk armor.