Reviews for Contact at Kobol
Worldmaker chapter 1 . 3/25/2021
Your writing style, wherein you directly addressed the reader, is off-putting and the sign of a bad writer. Never address the reader directly.
Darth Gumby chapter 34 . 3/22/2021
Earth doesn’t want a war with the Colonies. They’re tied up in Pegasus at the moment. They have limited resources and are in a growth phase at the moment. To that end, the Tau’ri response should have been to demand the heads of the people responsible...including Cain. When that didn't happen Earth should have gone in and blasted a bunch of Colonial military infrastructure, fucked up their military shipyards and set them back a few decades. They then declare the issue resolved give the colonials updated maps and issue an ultimatum for the Colonies to stay the fuck out of Tau’ri space on penalty of Round 2. The Politicians can pretty it up and throw in a bunch of stuff about how the Colonies are to blame and brought it all on themselves by attacking innocent civilians…. All the standard psy ops stuff. Earth then just parks a bunch of recon Satellites along the borders to keep watch over the Idiot Colonials and focuses it’s attention on winning the war in Pegasus and expanding their fleet to secure their position as the 5th Race. It’s win win for them, they get their revenge, they avoid a long drawn out conflict and they get to look benevolent and wise in the eyes of the Nox.
Earth doesn't need to launch a full scale war to cripple the colonies. Attacking with fleets or squadrons of Fighter/Bombers would only drive the Colonial leadership into hiding and make them stubbornly resistant to making peace. Hit them hard...then acknowledge your done and walk away.
They can't actually do much harm to Earth and monitoring Satellites would insure they didn't get near Valhalla again.
We eventually send in a covert ops team to extract Admiral Cain and the military planners who authorized the attacks on Vallhalla. We take them back to Gaia to stand Trial, sentence them to suitably long rehabilitation cracking rocks on some Tok'ra outpost in the ass end of nowhere... and we call it a victory.
Darth Gumby chapter 30 . 3/19/2021
Sadly... given the current political climate in the US, punching a POW, even one that just nuked Disney Land and killed thousands of innocent civilians, would immediate earn that soldier a full court martial and a dishonorable discharge for "War Crimes". In fact, the US leadership would trip all over itself in it's mad dash to crucify the serviceman to prove how woke and morally upstanding the administration is and how terrible the military is in general.
Ok, Rant over.
Darth Gumby chapter 28 . 3/19/2021
Energy Weapons. That's why you use Lasers for this sort of thing.
Darth Gumby chapter 27 . 3/19/2021
So let me get this straight...Adar sent a flag waving flotilla to intimidate the Tau'ri with how mighty and impressive the Colonials are...even though the Tau'ri were already aware of the size of his military, and instead of jumping in on the edge of the system and coming in on Sublight to "scare" the Tau'ri by letting them know the Colonies could reach them... the idiot in command decides to jump into near orbit BEHIND the long range defense platforms...beyond the colloquial 'Point of no return', virtually guaranteeing that the automated terminal defense systems would be forced to engage the unknown contacts jumping directly into firing range with live nukes.
Does that about sum up the insanity here?

NOTE: As many have already said, traffic simply can not be so dense as to obstruct all orbit of the planet. If the Owls can get can the Akula.
Darth Gumby chapter 26 . 3/19/2021
Those are some of the most insane tasking orders ever devised. "We aren't to fire unless fired upon...but we're also ordered to charge headlong into their space and not stop until we reach their world...if they fire to prevent us from positioning high yield nuclear weapons in orbit of their planet, THEY are the ones starting the war"
Darth Gumby chapter 23 . 3/19/2021
I understand the need to facilitate the plot... but man is that a bad legal ruling... "We say you're compelled to be a member of our club...but since you didn't actually sign up, you're not a full member and we own you, all your people and planets, all your technology and resources belong to us and you have no say in anything at all until such time as you sign the documents and legitimize our takeover of your civilization."

Now in reality, if you can use such a thing in science fiction, Earth would have delivered an official statement demanding the unconditional return of Col Oneil and Immediately dispatched a battleship to destroy a random moon or two on the fringes of Colonial space to highlight the severity of the shit storm the rash actions of the military judges had brewed for the Colonies.
Darth Gumby chapter 21 . 3/19/2021
Fantastic Story...

However, There are HUGE holes in the logic of Cain's argument. She can not draw a corollary between Earth not signing the articles of Colonization...and the 12 Colonies themselves not being a legitimate government organization. At the time of their founding...there were only 12 colonies in existence, only 12 individual governments to come together and sign up to create this shared government. They simply added a line for a 13th and had a stand in sign for "Earth" which as far as any of them knew, did not exist.
It's the equivalent of the Tau'ri having one of their people sign for North Korea to join up, and then demanding that North Korea abide by their laws.
Darth Gumby chapter 9 . 3/18/2021
Chalk it up to the Colonies being a bit different than Earth...but the "Reunion" between the three sixes was grossly unprofessional and PAINFUL to read. On Earth, three 'Bombshell' triplets in high ranking positions openly talking about sleeping their way into positions of authority... wouldn't play well and practically SCREAMS corruption and nepotism.
Sammyboy94 chapter 36 . 2/22/2021
Wow, all the tier 1 and 2 Special Forces on earth deployed against the colonials, they’re screwed
CatScratcher chapter 17 . 2/5/2021
Reviled instead of Revealed, Expectation instead of Expedition. These misspellings are really jarring.
CatScratcher chapter 14 . 2/5/2021
This is a pretty good story, My only quibble is the spelling mistakes where the wrong word is repeatedly used eg. Zues instead of Zeus, Exudes instead of Exodus and Population scrubber by which I really hope you meant Pollution scrubber.
Fleet Corner Trimmer 2415 L.S chapter 60 . 2/4/2021
I usually wait till the end to review but I must say

You called this chapter a Time skip
I think a better description is 'Training Montage'
Darth Gumby chapter 68 . 1/23/2021
Do you know why the Jafa feared the Asgard? It wasn’t the fear of dying in the vastness of space, it was the specter of an invincible Beliskner Floating over the battlefield while battalions or Goa’uld soldiers simply vaporized into nothing. The Tau’ri Wield the power to literally make the colonial ground forces just go...away.
The Asgard Never bothered with ground assaults, they simply floated invincible above the battlefield wiping out the enemies ground forces with precision transporter capabilities. At the conclusion Of this chapter, the Tau’ri Navy hangs victorious in orbit over Tauron, and there is not a single thing that the colonial ground forces can do about it
Darth Gumby chapter 56 . 1/23/2021
The amount of nurfing of Tau’ri technology needed to make this happen..It’s starting to make the story less and less enjoyable. The colonies do not possess enough vessels to flood the space over the world To the point of any arriving starship crashing into another. Asguard Beam technology can move entire buildings From the surface of earth to high orbit...There was absolutely no reason to beam down a strike team. Furthermore Sarcophagus technology Means that Earth would most likely have allowed the execution...then recovered the Sergeant’s body and revived him.

A passenger liner impacting the shields of a warship would have resulted in the passenger liner being obliterated, not recognizable corpses floating in space for propaganda purposes
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