Reviews for Broken
bokuhos chapter 1 . 7/31/2015
I don’t think I’ve ever read a Naruto fan fiction story quite like this one before. I really like that. I love the fact that you’ve highlighted the secondary characters and placed them in the spotlight. I’m intrigued by both your original characters and the fascinating plot line that you’ve begun to tell. I really hope this isn’t completed because I would be all for reading a few more chapters about this. Even if it’s flash fiction or turned into a drabble series. I just… this is too good to pass up! I’ll keep my fingers crossed and hope that inspiration hits you again soon because personally, I think Niyame’s adventure has only just begun.
lost in details chapter 1 . 7/31/2015
This story is absolutely fascinating!

I loved everything about it from the moment I first started reading. The imagery, the pacing, the characters that were included (both the supposed “supporting cast” members and these very new original characters too). All of the characters seemed to be written very well; in such a way that makes me think you breathed life into them. To be frank, I could imagine everything happening perfectly. How she seemed so out of it because she hadn’t slept in such a long time, forcing herself to remain awake and serve her village. It was all very realistic to me – the sense of patriotism as well as the reactions to screwing with your circadian rhythm.

I honestly don’t know what else to say except that I find myself intrigued by the entirety of the plot.

I want to know more about Niyame. (As an aside, I love her name and would love to know what it means and how you went about picking it for her.) I loved her interactions with Raidou and Ibiki. The moment she touched Raidou’s face was absolutely heartbreaking for me, actually. It was intimate and you could easily tell that Raidou was uncomfortable with the way you worded everything. Yet he pushed through. The chemistry between them, even for just a few paragraphs, left me astounded. I’ve always been very picky about romance stories and romance written into stories as side-plots. I’m not sure if that’s what will happen here since I remember reading that you weren’t sure if there even would be pairings in this story… however, I don’t think I’ve come across a fan fiction writer who has written chemistry between two very different characters who are perfect strangers so well in a looong time. And I’m kind of hoping that you might consider continuing this and going down that route.

If you have any questions, please feel free to send me a private message. I would love to chat more about your story! I’m one of those oddballs who loves those hidden gem stories you stumble upon every so often and I’m positive this is one of them! It’s just an added bonus that it seems to be an oc-centric story, which is a weakness of mine. As I’ve said before, I really do hope you continue this. I would love to read more about this mysterious illness and what’s going on with Mei back in Kiri. I want to know what Tsunade is going to do about this and how Niyame will act around both Konoha’s shinobi and its villagers. I imagine the adjustment period is going to be pretty long. Unless she meets with some rather persistent people, haha! And we all know that Konoha has quite a few of those. There must be something in the water. ;)
Ducky the Insomniac Panda chapter 1 . 6/13/2015
This is a really interesting and unique little fic, you know that? I haven't seen anything with a plot like this before, and on top of that, it's well written to boot. I'm quite excited by the prospects of this little story!