|Reviews for Twintale|
| Cervidas chapter 2 . 12/1/2015
This getting good.
| Trondason chapter 2 . 12/1/2015
And here we go, having to fight strangely violent frogs, fairys, and vegetables. Wonder how the twins will fair.
And is Dipper possessed by Chara? That will be interesting. Wonder if Mabel as Frisk in her head too.
| Trondason chapter 1 . 12/1/2015
Looking rather good. Only thing is that it feels like it's going to fast, and Flowey didn't even try to be convincing. Flowery has ALOT of experience tricking and befriending people after all, and as far as he knew he had nothing but time to trick the humans into believing him.
I wonder how the twins will react to the Underground. Something it seems like most people don't realize, is that in game almost everyone you meet instantly attacks you with intent to kill, and unless the character both knows of their reset ability, and has infinite patience to not take it personally, it would be frightening as hell, and a person is more than likely to fight back.
| Flowergirl8 chapter 2 . 12/1/2015
This is so cool! I love how well you captured the character's personalities, and I can't wait to see where this is going!
| aAAAA chapter 2 . 11/30/2015
THIS IS PERFECT WHAT I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN LOOKING FOR
when you have the time PLEASE CONITNUE! aaaaa
| Robertnak chapter 1 . 11/30/2015
| RainbowSaga chapter 2 . 11/30/2015
This is amazing! I love this fanfiction, even if it has only been two chapters so far!
| ChillingShadow chapter 2 . 11/30/2015
This is great! Everyone is totally in character! XD I love it so much! Your story is so good!
| Aines445 chapter 1 . 11/28/2015
Consider me sold! The greatest pitfall for a story of this sort (with the premise of the protagonist getting replaced by other characters) is to have it be too close to the original canon plotline and having basically the same things happen with a different character. This doesn't seem like it's going to be the case judging from this first chapter, which is why I'm totally sold, especially if I'm going to see Dipper and Mabel go on this journey through the Underground. Like, I've just recently watched all the episodes there were to watch of Gravity Falls, so it's definitely awesome to see this kind of stuff!
So far, everything seems alright characterization-wise (as in, no one appears OOC), and your writing is leagues above anything I could do. However, I'm totally wondering just how Mabel and Dipper fell to the Underground; hopefully there will be a reason for this explained in later chapters! And also... was that voice in Dipper's head Bill? Because if it was, I sure hope there's an explanation for that later on as well. Basically, there are a lot of questions pertraining to this story's background (when is it set? Why is this happening? Etc...) and I'm really curious about them. Also seriously wondering just how stuff will change in the story, especially how you'll deal with the more meta aspects of Undertale's plotline (the battles, Flowey...).
"(...), brought out by the fading rays of a sunset that was quickly working its way belong the horizon, (...)"
You mean 'along' the horizon, right? Or is my subpar vocabulary showing...?
"Because he was going to die and Mabel was going to die and that stupid flower was going to keeping smiling and there was nothing he could do to stop it."
'Keep smiling'. Beyond that, great writing. So great, in fact, that I bothered to point out typos because I couldn't bear to see them when you have such good writing. Dunno if I missed others if they exist, but let's hope otherwise. Either way, I don't use tumblr (as in, I don't even have an account), but now I'm really curious about the fanart you're talking about! x.x Well, whatever the case, hopefully this was somewhat helpful and I look forward to the next chapter!
| Cervidas chapter 1 . 11/28/2015
Not bad... But more details and words.
| InkMango the FABULOUS chapter 1 . 11/27/2015
I truly enjoyed this, and hope you continue this in the future. It was truly enjoyable and can't wait for more in the future!