|Reviews for A Slightly Drunken Confession|
| Martin III chapter 1 . 6/23/2016
First off, this isn't bad. Frankly, it isn't good either, but it's clear that sincere effort went into it and that counts for a lot.
The first problem is that the prompt isn't very good, at least not as a basis for a romance. It just relies too much on contrivance. And given how unlikely a couple Apollo and Ema are, it's not a very convincing impetus for them getting together.
The second problem is Apollo abruptly getting drunk without having had any additional drinks doesn't work, for obvious reasons. In writing, it's always best to adhere to the rules of reality and continuity. Not only does it save you from losing plausibility, it usually leads the story in more interesting directions.
A third problem is that Apollo getting drunk without a designated driver lined up is violently out-of-character.
Apollo's pickup line is genuinely clever and amusing, and I really have to give you a hand for that, assuming of course that it is original. Actually, even if it's not original, I have to give you a hand for using it because it is so perfectly appropriate for Ema, and to a lesser extent for Apollo as well. The dialogue in general works well with the characters; I wouldn't say it's completely in-character, but it's believable.
| Squirrel Wright chapter 1 . 1/13/2016
First time ever having the guts to comment on something!
Aww! You're right, this pair needs more love. Emapollo is my number 2 pairing after Feenris. This fits with my headcanon, where Apollo is the only person Ema knows other than Lana who likes science as much as she does, and from there their friendship grows, until at some point - in this story, when she starts to cry - that's when the penny drops in her head that she's fallen for him. I feel for poor Apollo there. Doesn't take much drink to knock me out, either! From his side, his awkwardness also fits. I've always imagined him never having feelings for a girl before he met Ema, so he needed a situation like this one because he'd be too shy to say anything to her otherwise. Nice job.