|Reviews for Schism|
| Miss Corrine chapter 19 . 3/14/2016
This was perfect. A great ending for this story. I'm kinda sad to see this story go. I loved the touch with spring break and the gold bikini. I would love to see Ben's face if he saw a picture of Leia in the letters were also a... unique touch. Overall, this was a great chapter and story.
| Sheena Kushiashi chapter 19 . 3/14/2016
1...2...3... All together now: Awwwwwwww!
| mercyandmagic chapter 19 . 3/14/2016
I also enjoyed the Millicent Easter Egg.
And the last line is perfect.
| abandonedaccount47 chapter 5 . 3/14/2016
Cute! Poor Poe.
| abandonedaccount47 chapter 2 . 3/14/2016
I, uh, like the writing style as always, but... There's quite a few things about this scene that make me uncomfortable, mostly the Unkur thing. I promise this isn't an attack (you know I love your writing!), but did you do some research about the foster system and child abuse? Or have some sort of first or second hand experience with it? Because there are several things in here that come off as sort of... Disneyified and very, very rushed. Like all of this is simply background scenery for Rey's character rather than an actual prop, if that makes any sense. I don't really know how to explain what I mean here. Just that Rey and her responses to the whole situation seem to be weird and even a tad inappropriate for her, given the subject matter anyway.
I can try and make more sense later in a pm or something, (if you want it anyway), If you don't that's fine too. I just figured that I'd give you my thoughts (sorry if they seem rude, if you want I'll refrain from this in the future, I personally like getting constructive criticism for my writing, but I know it's not everyone's cup of tea...)
But yeah, I can't speak for all abused kids, of course, and there is probably someone out there with your Rey's disposition despite her situation, but overall I feel a bit like you're (unintentionally, I know you're a good person!) just glossing over it, which is pretty sucky for those of us who've dealt with these things in real life. You're a good writer (you know I love your stories, except when you killed Finn, I was mad there lmao), but the sudden rush and her 'escape' so quickly without really explaining what changed her mind (after all, she had no guarantee that she could really escape... And if she ended up back there again she would've had hell to pay) just sort of cheapened the whole premise.
Sorry for the long ramble, and sorry if I seemed accusatory or disbelieving (for all I know this is based on your personal life, but I'm taking my chances and guessing that it's probably not...) This is just a really touchy thing for me and all too often I've seen writers (even good ones) fall to the trap of using abuse to either make the story more dramatic or to give a character an unnecessarily gritty background. Of course this whole trope can be done well, but it's hard to pull off and, even though Rey would be as good a character as any to explore these ideas (after all, her canon life was hardly peaches and creme) with, I would strongly argue that you either really revise this whole thing heavily or even scrap it all together (or just leave it in the subtext).
Ah, hopefully you don't hate me now. I still like your stories a lot! I just have a sort of nagging feeling in my gut and I thought I would at least point it out.
| abandonedaccount47 chapter 1 . 3/14/2016
I have made a terrible decision.
| bluejustice13 chapter 18 . 3/13/2016
Yay! Phew, I was SO worried that that would be the end for them! I am so relieved to read everyone recovered! Continue!
| aleksmorozova chapter 18 . 3/13/2016
IM SO GLAD EVERYTHINGS OKAY. So much sh*t happened. I'm so glad that bastard's been arrested.
| woeismexx chapter 18 . 3/13/2016
After reading this, the feels have come upon me, it feels like a sledgehammer repeatedly smashing my heart. So many feels. Glad everyone is okay. Ben's confession was beautifully written. Great job, great story :)
| stellarthought chapter 18 . 3/13/2016
Can I just take 5 minutes here to fangirl over Ben? Like, how awesome is he? How brave and honest, and heroic is he? He did something I don't think I ever could. I hope I could. If they make him like that in the movies I'll spend the rest of my life watching the movies once a day every day. Not even kidding. Till the grave.
You were right, his scar is sexy :P
I'm so sad it's nearly over. Can't believe tomorrow is the last day I'm gonna spend in this world. I need more! There should be fanfictions based on your fanfiction!
| stellarthought chapter 17 . 3/13/2016
This was the most amazing thing I've read on this site in... ever. It was so cinematic! The drama, the action, the suspense, the emotions... ah! Everything was wonderful and had a huge impact.
I loved the part about Poe realizing he's still a child. I think you're the first writer who ever bothered to explore Poe's inner world. And it was insightful.
Finn was his usual amazing self, and Ben... ah, Ben. What is it about this character that makes me love him so much? And forgive him no matter what?
Unbelievable work! Amazing chapter! I'm downright distraught that it's ending :(
| Miss Corrine chapter 18 . 3/13/2016
Oh gosh. So much in two chapters. At least they're mostly alright. Snoke is in prison, they know about Ben, no one is dead. It's fine for now. I can't wait for the next chapter.
| ShortySC22 chapter 18 . 3/13/2016
I loved Ben's confession here and love that Rey is so supportive of him. I really love how this related to TFA throughout and can't wait to see how you'll end the story (and of course what you'll come up with next)
| Sheena Kushiashi chapter 18 . 3/13/2016
Aw, another chapter that puts me in a really good mood! I really want to see what happens with Snoke though; how he reacts, what he has to say for himself, that sort of stuff but this is great! I'm so sad that its ending so soon. I was half hoping to see this go to the end of the semester but I'll take what I can get ;)
| mercyandmagic chapter 18 . 3/13/2016
Awwwww Ben. 3 So heartwarming.