Reviews for Lucian's Pack |
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![]() ![]() ![]() Amazing! Please continue! |
![]() ![]() CONTINUE!pls x |
![]() ![]() ![]() Keep going |
![]() ![]() please make more this story sounds really good |
![]() ![]() Really liked this could you please update if possible |
![]() ![]() ![]() please update! |
![]() ![]() Please update |
![]() ![]() Omg please update ASAP or I will Die |
![]() ![]() ![]() This is a good idea. I'm interested in reading more, so please update soon. |
![]() ![]() you have a lot of writing potential and the concept of your story is great but I would like to see a little more detail in your writing to make it longer and some more of the and some more of the characters thoughts and emotions |
![]() ![]() ![]() Sounds interesting, please continue! |
![]() ![]() Please continue :)) |
![]() ![]() I just wanted to say that in your first sentence, you said "my legs were burning with excretion" and I think you meant "burning with exertion", because excretion is a scientific word for poop... But other than that it was really good! You should carry on! |
![]() ![]() ![]() Okay, here is my thoughts on your story- I really like the concept, it's seriously a great idea and I think the more you write the more people will show interest. I have learned that a lot of readers wait to see if you are going to continue with your story before they show any interest. There are so many writers that will start a story and not finish it and that's hard on the readers that fall in love with their storylines. You may want to try and make your chapters longer too - I received the same advice when I started publishing on this site. The detailing in your story is great, that's something I have had to work on. I wish you all the best with your story and hope to see that you update! Good luck! |