Reviews for The Singularly Sensible Seduction of SSA Hotchner
Scousedancer chapter 1 . 3/23
Oh my WORD!That has to be the hottest and laugh out loud funny stories I've ever read! I absolutely loved it!
Loads of Randomness chapter 1 . 5/23/2017
Personally prefer Emily/Reid but this was very well written and I love how you write Emily
tlyxor1 chapter 1 . 11/10/2016
lol, poor Reid
omnomnivore chapter 1 . 8/11/2016
So like Rossi and poor Reid... I died of laughter at the end.
oliviahotchner chapter 1 . 6/23/2016
Oh, this was precious! Hahaha! My favorite part:
Now you own Reid dinner.
And therapy.
Hahahahaha! Hilarious!
LetMeWalkTheEarthWithYou chapter 1 . 6/21/2016
I came across this on AO3 a few days ago and left kudos, but totally forgot to log in.
I absolutely love this one! It's hot and funny and I feel so sorry for Reid. Poor guy. lol. This is so going to my favorites!
greeneyedconstellations chapter 1 . 5/2/2016
So, I'm obsessed. Really and truly obsessed with this. I thought I was obsessed with The Hues of Us, and I do love that one, but THIS ONE. THIS ONE IS EVERYTHING I EVER WANTED FROM SMUTTY HOTCHNISS.

I'll try my hand at a semi-logical, well flowing review, but I make no promises because I love this so much it's hard to be eloquent.

The entire premise of this fic makes me abnormally giddy: Hotch and Prentiss undercover at a poker tournament, of all damn places, with Emily in a red dress I can only imagine is stunning, and Hotch in a suit. With the alcohol flowing. And the flirting. I can't. And the fact that the team is so damn sneaky and totally try to set them up is hysterical. You struck the most perfect tone between the humor and the...well, sex.

(The holster strapped to Emily's thigh god damnit as if I didn't already have a massive crush on her)

The smut is SO PERFECT. I could cry about it. It's got all your usual gorgeous, emotive storytelling along with excellent characterization of Hotch and Prentiss.

Rossi is my most favorite human in this story besides our sexy couple because he's hysterical and sneaky and mischievous and meddling and SO WELL WRITTEN. And why the hell does it not surprise me that Hotch is entirely clueless and Emily is so FORWARD. I love them too much. I love your writing too much. I just love it.

This is like the stuff of my dreams, I tell ya. I'm about to pick out my favorite parts bit by bit because with a fic like this, it's only necessary. THANK YOU FOR THIS WONDERFUL GIFT I LOVE IT SO MUCH I HOPE THIS REVIEW CONVEYS THAT
tlcroft chapter 1 . 5/2/2016
Lucky Aaron and poor Reid; he certainly didn't expect THAT! And it wouldn't surprise me if everyone was in on it.
Annber03 chapter 1 . 5/1/2016
...ooooooookay, so I need to do another "chronological thoughts" review here, 'cause I am seriously cracking the fuck up at all of this and I need to properly sort out my thoughts. So let's do this...

-Getting this rather sad one out of the way first: "He hasn't been Aaron since Haley" ...oh :(.

-I really want to read those stories of Hotch trying to awkwardly fit in with the rest of the team at their various gatherings now. Particularly Garcia dragging him to a Tupperware party and Rossi and his random golf buddies. The story's barely started and I'm already having giggle fits at Hotch's total WTF? reaction to his friends' odd ideas of fun.

-And so the teasing and torture of Reid begins :D. The "apologizing every time he talks/being sorry for merely existing" line, though-awwww, Reid.

-I should NOT find Hotch's deep feeling of discomfort at JJ and Emily smirking at him in an "evil plotting" manner as funny as I do, should I? Well, too bad :D.

-Ohhhhhh, that story about Hotch climbing through Haley's bedroom window with chocolates! THAT'S SO CUTE! *Proceeds to smack Sean's hand for eating said chocolates*

-Hotch being super weirded out by Rossi getting a suit in Hotch's precise measurements was where I started really losing it. The "What the fuck, Dave?" line in particular killed me. And the flowers, and him randomly following Hotch as he goes to take a shower (seriously, what the fuck, Rossi?), and teasing him about this being a date and his whole phone thing...oh, my god, I just cannot with him, and with these two in general :D.

-"You do know fun, yes? It's that thing that other people do while you glare disapprovingly at them." Oooooh, snap. Me-yow, Rossi. And no, Hotch, saying something over and over does not automatically make it true, hate to break it to you :D.

-While I love Hotch noting that Emily looks "fucking gorgeous" (literally so, evidently with the first part of that description, given later events...), in JJ's defense, it might be a little odd to say "You guys look fucking gorgeous" to your boss's face. I'm just sayin' :p.

-Emily's right, Hotch, you aren't even remotely subtle at all. There's a reason the rest of the team keeps winking and smirking at you. And "a small part of him wonders what she'd look like with just the holster on"? Well! I'm suddenly hearing Emily's "Naughty boy" remark in my head, except it's being directed to Hotch this time :p. I don't blame him for being a little unnerved about that, though...but is it wrong I'm now curious what other weird kinks the team might've picked up through their job?

-LOL at them being utterly bored out of their skulls with poker, and Hotch randomly profiling people to try and hold his interest. And OF COURSE Reid would share every last possible detail about poker and calculations. Given what Hotch and Emily made him hear and witness later, though, they were wise to patiently sit through this :p. I do wonder, though, if part of the reason Reid is rambling on as he is is because he's trying to distract them from making goo-goo eyes at each other all night. If he did, it seemed to work overall-sure, Emily was getting all snuggly, but Hotch showed some pretty good restraint.

(Also, despite the description of these particular glasses, honestly, given the photos I've seen of Thomas Gibson in glasses, I gotta say, Hotch would look pretty hot with them. Especially when paired with a dapper suit.)

-"It's David Rossi level unprofessional." *Snort* And LMAO, oh, my god, he and Emily have been going to increasingly expensive and fancy restaurants SEVEN TIMES now and he DIDN'T CATCH ON?! Someone needs some brushing up on their profiling/romance skills :p. He does make a good point about Emily buying him that sweater, though...and Emily's also right in that he would probably look super cute in it.

-Okay, forget worrying he's turning into Rossi, Hotch pushing those glasses up and acting all nervous at Emily's forwardness made me think he's turning into Reid :D. I'm not sure which option amuses me more.

-And speaking of Reid...way to interrupt the mood there, pal :D! But I can't say I blame him-I could just imagine him looking/sounding all "miserable", and the "I tried to...not" and ohhhhh, the poor thing. Hotch's comment about him later on, though: "He almost went cross-eyed trying to work out where to look when he was debriefing me." Oh, my god...I really shouldn't laugh at that, either, should I? *Puts head in hands* (I just hope Hotch didn't use the word "debriefing" when talking to Reid in his office afterward, 'cause...well, yeah.)

-So I'm not sure what I find more amusing/impressive about Emily here at the end: the fact that she actually waited on top of a car for who knows how long until Hotch finished up his work (she knows how long he can spend at work, after all) or the fact that she wore no underwear, and yet despite being as physically turned on as she was, managed to walk around all night in that dress without her arousal being so blatantly obvious. LOL at the lame "panty lines" explanation, too.

-Oooooh, that encounter on the car was HOT. Yes. I kind of get a real kick out of sexually frustrated/impatient Emily Prentiss, I have to say :p. And I love how she can make Hotch go from awkward and shy to aggressive and wicked all at the same time. Also, "you fucking encouraged this, Rossi". Hee. I love the callback to the "creepily well-fitted suit" thing (and the holster kink, too!). I also appreciate the realism, too, with them making a bit of a mess as they did on each other's outfits.

-Yes, Emily really likes you, Hotch, so GO FOR IT. Quit overthinking things and just go be happy together and have wild sex in random places :D.

-LMAO, of course it'd be Rossi sending the texts that would put a bit of a crimp in their good time. Good taste in shows, though!

-Because it cannot be said nearly enough, poor Reid. Just...he really does need a hug :p. LOL.

So yeah. This story was hysterical and sexy and awesome and now my cheeks hurt from smiling and laughing so much. I loved this so much.
rmpcmfan chapter 1 . 4/30/2016
Those two are very hot! Dave is just hilarious. Loved it.
iluvhotchme chapter 1 . 4/30/2016
OMG! Poor Reid, he's going to need lots of therapy.
Thanks for the huge laugh.
Gerardfan chapter 1 . 4/30/2016
Funny. Funny. Really enjoyed it.