|Reviews for Torn Apart|
| Sideos chapter 18 . 10/27/2016
I FINALLY HAD TIME TO READ THIS YAY! And it was totes worth it too. Cos it was a great chapter, Arthur's conversation with Shiker's was great, with him battling over what he needed to do and the Shiker knowing that Arthur was gonna be screwed regardless.
Poor Arthur, I feel like unless something amazing happens he's totally done for in this fic. I mean in a good storytelling way of course, but either way, it's like the only way he's gonna get Kay back (ps #makeKaylive2016) is by joining her in the depths of the underworld.
Also Persephone is oddly nicer than I thought she'd be? Like she's still otherworldly but... approchable somehow? I dunno it's an interesting characterisation. Also from what I understand Hades is also not a bad guy. Still a god and whatnot, but you know you can actually deal with him. He's just a guy doing his job kinda thing. I have high hopes for him.
Lastly I heard everything the ferryman said in a propa norfun torwn innit mate. If you need any Northern Brit slang to throw his way just tell me.
NEXT CHAPTER I GOOOO.
| Sideos chapter 16 . 10/5/2016
Alright so I finally got around to reading! And I dunno what you were on about this chapter was great. The pacing was solid, the characters were well written, and I especially liked Vivi's line about being a mortal and tackling these bizarre situations she's in.
In fact Vivi really did shine here. It's good to be reminded why she's the leader of the gang, she can pick others up and push others forwards when they need it. I also liked how Teles kinda had a bit of action here and Chloe too showed some skills.
A good chapter all around, keep being awesome yo!
P.S ugh reviewing on mobile sucks.
| Sideos chapter 15 . 9/28/2016
Okay first I'm sorry for now reviewing earlier!
Secondly I really felt like Arthur was gonna get munched on this chapter. Like Demeter was just pure evil man, she's got that kind of subtle, moraless evil that makes her a really ethereal villain. As a character she totally comes off as someone utterly different and above or beyond the understanding of the other characters.
Also Persephone (probably spelled wrong) is going to show up soon? She's kind of a crazy badass in the myths soooo it'll be interesting to see your take on her.
Also big bro Lewis being protective big bro was heart warming and nice.
Anyway can't wait till next chapter yo!
P.S also Orange needs to get his stuff together like come on dude look at your arm man.
| Sideos chapter 14 . 9/20/2016
Alright so I should prob split this chapter up into two pets because the chapter kind of reads in two parts.
Part 1: I really loved the weird, nightmarish second person perspective with Arthur and Shiker and them desperately trying to keep their cover. Demeter really does come off as something utterly different in this and you could really feel how tense and nervous she was making Shiker. Also the memories with Tim in there are like so sad. Kind of deconstructing that happy marriage we all thought they had.
Part B: I feel super bad for Deluce here. Poor girl ha to essentially go through all of that on her own though I'm glad the Deadbeats are with her. I did enjoy the description of the old Harpy woman, like it came off like a Disney-esk old woman thing but it was still super creepy? Also EAT THE DARN TOMATO GIRL WHAT THE HECK.
Can't wait until the next chapter yo!
| Sideos chapter 13 . 9/17/2016
YEEEAH ANOTHER CHAPTURRR.
Anyway yes it was interesting to see how the others all ended up reacting to what happened in the last chapter considering the ruse is well and truly afoot now. I also liked how Vivi really stepped up and took charge here, for someone who had been so upset over her struggles dealing with her own disorders she's totally pulling it together and keeping everyone on track.
Also it's interesting to see the loophole being mentioned and put into action! #rescuedulcie2016
Can't wait for the next chapter dawg!
| Sideos chapter 12 . 9/4/2016
Okay so I wanted to say as before that the description of Demeter was soooo fitting for her character. She felt remarkably graceful and almost elf-like and yet also so very earthly with her connections to the nature around her. It was a really strange contradicting combination that absolutely worked for her.
Also the way that you wrote for Arthur again worked so well in this chapter with the 'over the shoulder' style perspective as the Shiker took over, and yet he still had his tiny moments of control or at least injecting his thoughts into what was happening around him. Made it seem almost bizarre and dream-like, which again helped really bring out the nightmarish reality of the situation regarding Timothy and Teles.
Finally I'd like to say that you could really feel the tension from Arthur in this. He's toeing such a tightrope here that at any moment it seemed like he could fall and lose everything. Maybe he still can. The next chapter should be veeeeerrry interesting indeed!
I can't wait for the next one yo! U RITE THE GUD FINGS.
| Sideos chapter 11 . 8/9/2016
See this is why I said you do raw, emotional scenes the best cos WOW that was awesomely intense. The way that Arthur became literally and figuratively less human as he taunted and talked to Teles was fantastic. I take it the half-way transformation was a kind of symbolic metaphor for how Arthur is now straddling the line between human and monster? I'm gonna go with a yes.
Also the bit where he was showering her with the feathers was pretty heartbreaking, literally letting the remains of her daughter fall about her was a pretty horrific way to break Teles.
Also the idea of her killing her kids to save them from a fate worse than death is actually remarkably Lovecraftian of you. It was a cool touch anyway, a method for Teles's madness.
And now we also know the truth behind it all! I wonder if at any point we'll get to see Persephone or Hades? They do have a lot to answer for now.
Anyway this chapter kicked a heckalotta butt, epic work dudette!
| Guest chapter 10 . 7/31/2016
nice work can't wait to see where this goes from here
| Sideos chapter 10 . 8/1/2016
Heck yeah escape scene guest starring Dib being horrible! Woo! That was pretty rad, loved that there was a swiftness to it that I actually wasn't expecting but it made a lot of sense in context. Also you really nailed down how Tim was feeling after being tormented for so long, and I loved how frosty Lew got with Teles at the end there.
Yeah that dad-son reunion was so bittersweet too and I expect it's gonna get way more bittersweet when Teles talks to the girls and stuff. At this point I imagine that she's truly given up and it'll be interesting to see if the gang or her family can find a way to pull her back.
Also Shikthur is a go! USE YOUR EVIL POWERS FOR GOOOOOD! But srsly Arthur pretending to be Shiker with Demeter is gonna be AWESOMESAUCE cos yes it will. Great chapter, the story is awesome, can't wait for the next chapter dawg.
| Sideos chapter 9 . 7/22/2016
Heck yeah another awesome chapter, that opening though. WHYYY TIM WHYYY. Also why Teles? Though I've got a suspicion that Teles isn't behind it.
Also good to see the gang acting a little more like the gang, even if everything is still weird and crazy and stuff. I can't wait for jailbreak chapter, but it's nice chapters like these that remind us why they're all friends in the first place.
Also that ending. Shiker no. Bad bad Shiker. Quit messing with Arthur.
Till next time home slice!
| Sideos chapter 8 . 7/6/2016
Okay so another awesome chapter and it's time for commentary or whatevs.
I liked how Dulice was trying her best to help Arthur in this. It was cute and I get the feeling that perhaps it'll come back to help at some point. Like a Chekhov's gun... But with a pen. Also I liked how Arthur continues to be the guy who can work out the loopholes and tricks with the powers around him. It's fun to see him work out how they can bend the rules to aid themselves because why shouldn't they?
Also Chloe in this. Poor Chloe. Maybe when she gets back to unicorn world she'll have her own magics adventure or something.
I would say though that I feel like an action chapter should come soon, hopefully the prison break will provide that. It seems like with the exception of the soldering scene there's been a lot of talking in the mansion, which is important, but some action scenes should help break that cycle up a bit.
Anyways peace out yo!
| Sideos chapter 7 . 7/2/2016
Another awesome chapter! Getting the feeling that slowly but surely the team is coming back together one by one. Eventually they might be co-ordinated enough to actually pull off arriving at a movie on time!
Oh wait, they have to defeat an evil Goddess and stop a horrific curse. Hum. Well I'm sure they can get that done too.
Also liked how Chloe was still Chloe in this, like irregardless of what form she's now in. I expect she's gonna go into full magic girl-horse mode in the next chapter.
Anyway yeah, great chapter, can't wait for the next one!
| Sideos chapter 5 . 6/20/2016
Another awesome chapter! It's weird that it's finally setting in that Kay isn't coming back. I know, I know, but I kept thinking 'oh maybe Child will surprise us and show she's not dead or something' but no, Kays long gone. And you know that's a good thing in this story, the weight of her death is shown on everyone, especially Arthur.
Also other things. Jerk Arthur is great to read, though you always feel like you wanna slap him upside head at some points. Lewis being hole again was sweet and it's sad that Vivi has memories 'like pictures in pictures' which was a great bit of description.
Anyway woot more stuffs and things yay go Child yeeeaaaaaaaaaah I'm tired can you tell yep also my back aches boo.
| Sideos chapter 4 . 6/1/2016
YEEEAH Arthur here being the man with the plan aww yis.
I liked that we got to see some Pepper family time in this one, despite you know... Them not all being together. And by family time I mean SOUL CRUSHING time. But still it's pretty good to see things rolling forwards, the last few chapters felt very mansion-centric so to have some outside stuff is fun.
Also would repairing a magical item require a magical blow torch?
Anyway yes glad I'm back on to reading this awesome fic. Can't wait till next chapter!
| Sideos chapter 3 . 6/1/2016
Finally got around to reading this chapter yay!
It was good to finally see the gang actually acting like a gang again, all together and whatnot at the end. It's about time after all the SOUL CRUSHING they've been that they start the healing process.
Also I look forward to seeing how they heal. How after al that's happened they start piecing themselves back together, even if some pieces are obviously lost forever at this point.
Gonna go read the next chapter now wheeee.