Parou na melhor parte, já quero a continuação.

10/10

Can I just say that this frickin hilarious?! I giggled so much through this story. LV/HP/Brandon running commentary in his head is hilarious. LV trying to play HP then trying to play Brandon Stark? His identity issues were comedy gold!

simply amazing. peak fanfic right here

Isn’t that population ridiculously low? Considering the sizes of their armies and the population of King’s Landing it’s gotta be higher than that

Great story,too bad it's abandoned. Hopefully we get another chapter before I die,lol.

where is Arya she's older than Bran

I read the stories you said you were inspired by and wow the difference in quality is extreme. Yours is so good while the other fics make Voldemort seem like some deranged man who still insisted on being called Voldemort. With horrendous spelling to boot

Love this

its the best

Great chapter.

RE: author note. Hahaha,Yes Mary-Sue crack fic. Loving it.

Lol,no house elves but at least I got a cook. Hahaha !

Honestly I enjoyed this so much I’ve reread it countless times since I found it two years ago

Thank you for writing what you did! I’ll try to let my imagination take over what might happen in the future

I forgot in chapter 1:

SERIOUS kudos and cookies for you for mixing up Harry vs Tom. A person IS their memories.
And if you have been Voldemort for 70 years, and Harry for a mere 2-5... who are you gonna believe yourself to be? Exactly! _

And Unicorn hair does not lend itself to the Dark arts, and can ONLY be wielded by a 100% non-violent person.

IS Harry incapable of hurting someone on purpose? Incapable of killing?

If he isn't, seriously change the unicorn hair.

PotterWiki has a list of wand parts and their properties and personality preferences.

Nore kudos for injecting a bit of humor and stumble-blocks (however small) in a story that would otherwise jave been boring as hell. (Courtesy of his Mary Sue powers and the summary style of writing.)

Your story makes a great summary of a story. I can't help but look forward to see the ACTUAL story when you write it. _

Oh, and Harry has no black blood. According to the Family Tree I studied, his closest living relative is one Tom Riddle, via the Gaunts.

(His grandfather...or grandfather's father's brother married one Dorea Black. But the family three showed no children, and it was definitely not Harry's direct bloodline either way.

(I theorize that Tom could have legally adopted Harry, because of the importance of blood in the wizarding world, and the laws favoring purebloods I know exist.

Him being a Dark Lord that terrorized the country might hinder him tho. But dumbledore keeping Voldie's real name a secret might actually make it impossible to prove that Tom Riddle is Voldemort -assuming he gets his good looks back and ages it apropriately, for a wizard. They do see to grow older than muggles. Much like a Hobbit.)

Mind you, Sirius DID make Harry his heir. So the only thing this means is that the Malfoys would throw and even bigger fit. Harry would still inherit everything.
(And Lucius should be Harry Sirius didn't disown Draco. He really could have. Harrycan't, but Sirous could.)

I also want to point out that Lilly owned a muggle record player, and it worked just fine.

The whole magic and tech don't mix is a fanmyth.
Likely created because most fans either wasn't born during the cellphone and pc-less 90s, or don't remember a time before smarphones.

Even IF you were rich enough to havea pc in '91, it was huge and heavy as a brick. And internet needed a landline to a phone. (You couldn't call AND use the internet at the same time for quite awhile. Lol)

Cellphones were mostly gigantic bricks that rich C.E.O.'s kept in their cars, until at least '96.
(At which point smaller bricks that could still qualify as a blunt weapon became more popular. But still not common. Depending on your country and city.)

Overall you're good at writing a summary story from Harry's POV.

It's boring as hell because he is so overpowered, but the small bits of crack-fic humor helpes that problem a bit.

IF it is only the two first chapets that is written in this style, and chapter 3 is where the REAL story, with REAL challenges to overcome starts...

...then I still think the intro is dragged out too long, but it makes sense.

If chaper 3 continues in the same style tho, I'mma gonna give up and take a nap before I fall asleep reading. Seriously.

You have a good imagination, and a good story idea.

But you need more practice with actually writing it.

Tip: Either write in First Person OR Third Person.
It's either "I did..." or "He did.."

PLEASE stopp mixing them like an unholy mess. It's confusimg amd sound stupid!

That said, I vote for using first person ("I") because the way you summarize the story makes heck of a lot more sense if it is Harry telling this story as a part of his memoars or something.

Third person needs a slower pace and more details to work well.

That said, your story is captivating from the first sentence, so all you need to do is select one perspective, and srick with it.

(You CAN choose first person persoective in chapter one, giving a summary...

And then switch to third person ciew in chaper two, slowing down, doing the "show, don't tell" thing every writing teachers nags about, and making it a more powerful story than a mere summary.

But if you CAN write first person perspective well, you can keep at it, but you still need to slow down and stop summarizing in the next chapter for the story to be truly good.)