Reviews for The Silent Familiar
AltenativeFutureFan27 chapter 2 . 8/6/2016
And So Neo start her debut by helping Foquet
ReZeXal chapter 2 . 7/12/2016
I have the feeling like Neo is just trying to figure out what to do. By staying at the academy, she can gather more information. Though in the end, I think she'll go back to her roots as a terrorist and do something awesome, possibly blowing something up. There are some Neo-mistakes, as in, things I believe Neo wouldn't do, such as voluntarily staying with Louise, without so much a fight. She did run out, but was easily caught, which shouldn't have happened, since she's Neo. I don't know how that matters, but it just does. Moving on, I like this series and hope for the next chapter to come out quickly.
snoogenz chapter 2 . 7/9/2016
Neo's potrayal is that bad here. Considering all we really know about her is that she is/can be sadistic, evil, and possibly murder loving girl. But I feel that's what draws us fans to like Neo. And her in twin tails. So unless you have Neo go on a killing spree, which she might be able to pull off with her semblance, you're going to need to make some adjustments here and there. As long as Neo gets some kills under her belt I'd be satisfied.
moon so bright chapter 2 . 7/7/2016
moon so bright chapter 1 . 7/7/2016
I like the story concept.
Suzunaan chapter 2 . 7/6/2016
No. This is definitely not Neo. All that is shared between Neo and your character is the name and the appearance (and her Semblance, but that's beside the point.). Neo is a skilled terrorist, who basically works for, I don't know, maybe the extermination of all mankind ?!
How could someone like, who can fight and win against an entire scadron of trained soldier, be defeated by an old man who didn't really fight for years ? And why would she follow someone like Louise, who is clearly mistreating and disrespecting her ?
Nah, like I said, totally not Neo. Just an OC why looks like her.
Guest chapter 2 . 7/3/2016
This feels like a Neo in name only. I know that there's not much known about Neo in RWBY, but even so, I don't get the impression that this is Neo at all. Not only did she lose ridiculously easily against Colbert (I get that he's strong, but he was also caught off guard and rusty as hell), but she's actually going to follow Louise's orders? She's not Saito, a naive kid; she's a terrorist of great skill. I can't see her just obeying a spoiled brat, especially considering Louise essentially kidnapped and enslaved her.

Also, I don't understand how anyone can mistake her for a peasant. Her clothing may look different from what residents of Halkeginia are used to, but the quality of her clothes should far surpass anything a peasant can afford. Even discounting that, her posture alone should be screaming 'noble'. That people still consider her a peasant just tells me that you're forcing canon stations to happen when it doesn't fit.

While the idea of having Neo in FoZ sounds interesting, your execution of it could use some work. If you're going to change a character then you should at the very least make sure the story reflects it. Otherwise, what you end up doing is follow canon plots and force the new person to act out of character. In which case, this would just become another copy of FoZ that isn't all that different to the original story.
Ridli Scott chapter 2 . 7/5/2016
Who is smaller Louise or Neo?
I vote for Neo, she's very sort (1.47m), and depending of the source Louise is between 1.47 to 1.56m, but this is your story and you choose.

The story runs in the way of the standar "another familiar summoned instead of Saito" fic. I hope you would surprise us breaking the mainstream story.
Student chapter 2 . 7/3/2016
Well she don't have much choice but follow I guess. Since Neo is combat and spy oriented than the Master Planner like Roman Torchwick, She needed someone with a brilliant mind to find a way back like Colbert perhaps. Anyway how Neo learn halkegenia writing? The translation spell only work through speaking not writing. Another question is why Neo seem to forgot Torchwick? Isn't he the closest acquaintance to Neo, and is she not worry about him getting Grimm eaten(which did happen) since Neo was forcefully flew away from him? Well put some more character attitude in her, not make her a push-over victim, instead she be the one pushing her enemy off the cliff with a smile( . /rwby/images/a/a2/V2_11_ /revision/latest?cb20141023233054) . Anyway that all~
MCZ chapter 2 . 7/2/2016
Will the Obligatory Fight With Guiche take place? I wonder how Neo would do in that.
More insane than some people see Neo? That's hard to believe. Personally, I believe she is constantly in a disguise.
Good chapter.
Alpha701 chapter 2 . 7/2/2016
Well, at least she became more reasonable now. I just imagine that when Guiche challenges Neo to a duel, she'll just be toying with him, or to say that she will seem like she isn't even trying and not even struggle. Anyways, I can't wait for the next chapter.
Student chapter 1 . 6/30/2016
Neo is still a mystery even the 3rd season of rwby ended, so how you going to make Neo follow Louise? When she clearly want her dead in a psycho killler way. Anyway she was defeated to easy in two reason, one the Aura is on red zone so no illusion or teleport and completely tired before summon by Louise, then number two, Aura don't work well in the FOZ world. Well I hope you got a good logical theory how you deal with Neo(I'M A BIG FAN OF HER).
Guest chapter 1 . 6/29/2016
...Let us give a moment of silence to the death of any manner of peace in Halkeginia.
MCZ chapter 1 . 6/29/2016
Was Neo too confused to just teleport?
I enjoy Neo fanfics, by the way, so I'll be checking by a lot.
I like the story so far.
Warden of Lore chapter 1 . 6/30/2016
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