|Reviews for Invasion by Betrayal|
| Sethwasmo chapter 1 . 6/8/2015
| reddir chapter 5 . 6/17/2013
Part 5 - I like what you did with the rituals surrounding the court and execution. Along with the captain/kane technique, it provided just the right feel of formality - not so much it was grotesque, nor too little to satisfy legal proceedings (vs vengeance).
I'm really liking your writing style. It feels like you put quite a lot of thought into setting up the scenes just right, and have enough background to know what will make the scenes work.
I'm going to follow you from now :)
| reddir chapter 4 . 6/17/2013
Part 4 - I liked how you set Kirk up, with the slow build toward dishonorable discharge. And then, ratcheted things up significantly with the interlude, while tying the interlude to Kirk in a couple of ways to ease the transition.
| reddir chapter 2 . 6/17/2013
Part 2 - You've surprised me with how quickly you've got me emotionally involved. You've really written this well, catching up my emotions while letting me feel some intellectual pleasure.
The captain's explosion of anger feels a bit much, but I don't yet know what Kirk did in the past so it might be justified. Still, bringing in the intellect to shore up the captain's desperation, and setting it up as underdogs scrambling to make things work, both these things have combined to overcome my problem with the anger and draw me in even further.
| reddir chapter 1 . 6/17/2013
Nice build up of tension in part 1.
I like the characterization of the captain. It slowly drew me in and toward the end I was caught up in the situation, following it beat for beat.
| Red Aviary chapter 4 . 3/27/2006
you know, i couldn't help but notice that the systems named are from FFX...anyway, nice story so far.
| ShadyDexter chapter 18 . 6/29/2005
*Grins* Fun stuff. I like the harvester's. Ever in the navy?
| Arbonite chapter 5 . 1/4/2005
Very nice, I'm only on Chapter5, and I'm hooked!
| VidgamerX chapter 18 . 11/2/2004
Finished reading it. It started slow, but it turned into a great story. Worth reading! Keep it coming!
| VidgamerX chapter 8 . 11/2/2004
Only on Chapte 8 so far, but it's a good story. Not great, but not bad either. Maybe that's because its not what I expected. It seems like an Star Trek take on the game.
It's got me interested though. :)
| Kegmaster Chen chapter 1 . 9/2/2003
nice try. lol.
| Ebil Adrnz chapter 1 . 3/25/2003
great EFFORT. Nice EFFORT. I'll create a Master or Orion fanfic too...