Reviews for Ghosts of the Past
Tank2552 chapter 44 . 4/16
this story is awsome
Weatherman21 chapter 1 . 2/1
And another one. I particularly enjoyed Maddie’s introduction, and the expansion of Harry’s family and loved ones.
LoveGoodBooks86 chapter 74 . 1/28
Hi,
I have loved this story so much!
You are a truly talented writer who not only wove a rich, complicated tapestry that incorporates all aspects of so many fantasy and sci fi world with history, myth and legends; but does so whilst being coherent and amazingly entertaining!
Please keep going as I have enjoyed hours and hours of wonderful enjoyment!
Thanks for the great read.
HPfanfictioner66 chapter 74 . 1/26
Alrighty. Finally at the end of this book. Gods above, million-word fics are exhausting to read and you wrote it. Man, kudos for writing this whole thing. Such work takes dedication at levels I can only imagine. I salute you mate.

Now, to opinions, more specifically as an author to another. If you find them helpful, you are welcome to take them into consideration. If not, you can feel more than free to ignore them. After all, I know myself that not every advice is always helpful. (I apologise in advance if I come across as harsh. I love your fic and would reread it multiple times without hesitation.)

1. I will take the most recent to start. The end of this book. I understand that you wished to break it into two due to its sheer length. But the problem is, you've stopped midway. I won't say abruptly but midway. You covered Harry's third year in CoS. I was expecting that you would do so here too. A second point was that there was no... big-bad being defeated here (something common in all fandoms). Hydra fell at the end of book 1 in your own story. Here, there was no 'big bad' going down. Yes, a lot of villains were scattered through the book: Red Room, Sinister, Dracula, Dave, Reynolds, whatever the fortress thing was... but the point stays. Nothing spanned from the start to end like Hydra did.
What this leads to is this fic turning into an... interlude fic. And for such a wonderfully written fic, it is fucking criminal to classify it as such. The story is so wonderful. Heck, beyond wonderful and dare I say, even better than its prequel in some ways. I wish you would've concluded it instead of breaking it down into a sequel.

2. The plot pacing: Here, I noted something. You have gone: Action-Action-Action/ fluff-fluff-fluff/ comfort-comfort-comfort. You have basically divided into large chunks of genres instead of mixing them. Like, you concentrated them together: Where there's action, there is continuous action or where there's fluff and comfort, it stays for a considerable chunk. For instance, once Harry's name comes out of the GoF, there's a lot of action. (based on the timeline, this all happened between October and January/ early Feb.) This could've been mixed up more. Some plot points could've been shifted so there was a mix than a clear separation. I'd say that you should try to make sure that there's not continuous action happening take the timeline into consideration and you'll see my point.
You could've instead spread it through Goblet of fire canonically. The fortress stuff could've been the second task or around it, if not the graveyard one.

3. Character focus: Okay, this is a little tricky when you've so MANY characters. Not everyone is gonna get an equal screentime and I get it. But the fact is... all the OG avengers felt like MINOR side characters in this story at many points. They weren't really shown except at the beginning. I loved how some new characters took the screen including Magneto, but I wish you'd have shown more of the Avengers too. (I am not considering Unfinished Business here.) This too, connects to my previous points. No big battles means no avengers assemble. Maybe try to include them more and not in just the emotional parts(something wonderfully done.)

4. Baby Ada. WE NEED MORE BABY ADA! CUTENESS!

Anyhow, this is all I can say. These are just... idk, me whining (except pt.2 ig). At the end of the day, it is your story, and a quite lovely one at that. I am looking forward to all of this coming together.

Take care man.
Wonderful stuff, which I hope to see more of (hint hint).

-HP
HPfanfictioner66 chapter 67 . 1/24
I meant to post the review here, on this chapter. Oops.
Anyhow, the Fury scene was intriguing.
HPfanfictioner66 chapter 66 . 1/24
I am conflicted about my feelings for this chapter, specifically you taking Hermione to a whole new level in a single stroke. On one hand, it seems absolutely brilliant and, in the grand scheme of things, a perfect replacement for what Wanda is to the Avengers.
On the other hand, I felt that somewhere, it was a bit over the top and unneeded for the lack of better words. I mean, I was and am very interested in Hermione being a chaos mage like Wanda. Giving her the X-gene was still okay. But a X-gene with an omega-level potential in itself with the possibility of her raw power surpassing Harry, who is an Asgardian demigod with an equally powerful X-gene and not to mention, a phoenix host? It is a little over the top. Also, I feel that it was 'unneeded' because I frankly don't think Hermione would progress fast enough to level up to the likes of Harry and the Grey twins in time.
In your story, it took Wanda years and she had been training under Strange, way before Hermione was born. She was 10 years Lily's senior, meaning had nearly two decades of training when Hermione was born and yet, she was still less powerful and skilled than Voldemort at that time. One more decade and half in, and she is NOW in the league of Thor and Loki. This totals to thirty years or more. (She's 45 as you have stated previously. Maybe 46 at this point.)
Hermione, at best, will have three before Thanos comes. (And this is the worst-case scenario I am laying with. I do not think you are going to write half a dozen sequels to this story before Thanos comes.)

Anyhow, while I did complain, I will go along with it solely for the reason that as far as things have turned out, you will find a way to justify Hermione. I am kinda feeling bad for Ron and I hope you somehow give him something good at least in the epilogue. He's the only one of Harry's friends who is not special or combat worthy.

Now, to the good parts as I save the best for the last:
I adored that you showed Dumbledore in such a good way in this chapter. The whole fight was brilliantly done and wrapped up. I loved how Hermione and Harry worked together. Precision and control. It set them apart in a way that defines them well. Sirius was a brilliant stroke of genius to put in here.
I am looking forward to how you go on ahead.
Take care.
HPfanfictioner66 chapter 60 . 1/22
Was this a good chapter? Yes. Did I like it? Not exactly. I could've done without it. But as an author, I will agree that this chapter was like a necessary evil. It was due to happen and it did.
Good work with the whole Reynolds fight.
Zavod chapter 74 . 1/19
Thanks for this colossal book.

I'm not a fast reader, so this took me a while.

Kudos, in particular, for crafting a story of epic proportions. Being able to mix in god-level of creatures with the (nearly) mundane has got to be tricky. Well done.

I had criticisms, of course, but i have learned (over time) that it's not helpful to the receiver/author for those to arrive after the story is completed.

So I'll only offer a couple of suggestion that may improve your characterizations in future stories.

Don't treat your characters like idiots, because it's effectively treating your readers as such. An example would be over explaining something that should already be obvious to the character. It wastes the reader's time, having to go through something where you KNOW the outcome is going to go one way because that's just good story telling. (ie: tighten up the story)

Avoid having one character retell their part in the story in order to convince a second character of something. Pages of redundant text could be replaced with the line "Harry gave Ron a detailed account of the battle".

Something else that you could think about could be the film school adageshow don't tell". You regularly have characters talk about things instead of having the events show the thing. The simple example would be that MANY characters talk about how scary Doctor Strange is, but when he's "on screen", he's very likable. Similarly with Magneto: very scary? nope, not at all. They're actions didn't match their descriptions.
(they stretched their powers a few times, but mostly not on screen)

A (good) example would be how everyone says Dumbledore is bad ass, but then in the battle with the Hermione-Thing, he shows it. That was excellent!

Oh, and the whole Clark Kent thing had over a million words of build-up over two books, and effectively no pay off: after his moment in the spotlight to he vanished. The build up had us anticipating he'd be super important. (super, get it?)

Something I thought was really well done that I wish more stories would do is that you made the characters your own. The family relationships, for example. Who is dating whom. Their interwoven family trees and how the story made that work...

And a huge thanks for breaking away for canon. So appreciated.

I thought the idea of having recognizable big characters be in their teenage forms was quite clever.

But my #1 recommendation would be: show don't tell.

Thanks for the story! (stories?)
HPfanfictioner66 chapter 53 . 1/19
I was going to go and continue reading ahead but decided to give my thoughts on the story so far before the plot begins to complicate further and events arise.
The whole fight sequence with the dragon was well done though I'd have placed it in the second task (going with the lake) had I been writing the story. Though, since it is yours, I won't complain.
Past few chapters have been very sweet and the buildup is almost ready with all the visions and stuff.
I find it interesting what you're doing with Hermione and even Ron. A part of me feels sad for Ron but I can easily see him become the next generation's Nick Fury or Wisdom. If not that, at least Coulson.
I am guessing Hermione will join Harry's band of young avengers alongside Superman. Or become the next Sorceress Supreme after Dresden. Will make it run in the pseudo family and stuff.
Though, at this point, as Doctor Strange is getting tutors for Harry, I'd be VERY interested in seeing The Ancient One appear. She was an interesting character and, in the comics, and movies, Dr. Strange's teacher much like you showed Gorakhnath to be.
Idk how people didn't figure out that Adam Black is Voldemort. He hissed Dumbledore's name. But it was just one hint placed very carefully in what is a lot more complicated.
I don't totally remember this arc from my first reading. I honestly thought you had kept the Gorakhnath for later but it was not the case. Excited to read what happens ahead or more appropriately, reread. At this point I am honestly hoping I didn't miss the surtur fight or the Malekith one lol.

An important question that I've been wondering as of late is when will the series conclude, i.e. when will Thanos come? Here you've had your share of villains and have several ready: Malekith, Surtur, Voldemort. Not to mention whomever you put in for the occasional challenge which haven't been hinted at yet or missed.

Take care!
HPfanfictioner66 chapter 33 . 1/17
A great fight sequel and a worthy opponent as Dracula. Harry's growth shows slowly and steadily even though he didn't exactly win by himself. He is powerful and skilled but not yet in the league of gods. A very realistic power progression on the scale you've built the story on.
Harry's initial plan was very good and I was almost sad when it failed. But then again, it led to a all the more satisfying end so I won't complain.
I loved how Harry didn't go the power way and used his brain, trying to, and at the end, successfully outmanoeuvering a superior opponent.
On a side note, I would've loved to see more of Tony in action. He is my favourite character as far as the MCU goes. And you haven't really shown him in full action till now, in armor and all. Yes, Jarvis and all were there so were his suits and tech alongside some wholesome moments. This is just me wishing for a more badass ironman scene in a fight.
Of course it goes without saying that I am throughly enjoying the story.
HPfanfictioner66 chapter 20 . 1/16
I won't say much. The revelations parts got a bit too much at times. They weren't bad by any means and rather wonderful in fact. But if you begin to eat a dish you like every day, you will start to dislike it. That's what I felt happened here.
You could've postponed Strange's story to a later chapter in my opinion.
While you set up plot admirably for the Surtur conflict and even justify Strange, it became too much to the point that I skimmed past a few things. As a fellow author, I realize setting up lores can take effort and at times, info dumps (been through it, done it, made the same mistake.)
Next time (when you're going to set up a full way Thanos lore likely) try to space them out. It did require some planning, but you do it pretty well in my opinion. The story and plot hold strong across more than a million words is a feat only a select few could've pulled off.
Also, since you do make info dumps interesting, in small doses they'd be wonderful improving the quality of the story even further.
Take care. Sorry if I came across as harsh. :)
HPfanfictioner66 chapter 16 . 1/16
Alright, I won't comment much about Harry's torture and turning into the red son. The end was good with Harry coming back sane and the dark phoenix being extinguished, so to speak.
I liked the part where Doctor Strange now shows his true power. A power to threaten and hold the most powerful gods in the universe all by himself, even with the aid of the tesseract.
Jesus Fucking Christ was a great one. I am loving those quips and one-liners.
Not much more to say except good work.
HP66
HPfanfictioner66 chapter 12 . 1/16
Alright, I said I might not review, but I must point this out. Carol sassing Coulson "In the beginning there was nothing. And then, it exploded." was a golden line. Pure brilliance.
Add to the fact that Coulson didn't react at all and accepted it, telling her to get to the relevant part.
And I am also glad you didn't show torture here only mentioned it.
HPfanfictioner66 chapter 11 . 1/16
So, the Red Room arc. I remember it being quite nasty for me when I had first read it (but I'm not at that part yet.)
So far, I did say you went decently. A lot of shit being unleashed in short intervals. Voldemort, followed by Sinister and then the red room battle. I kinda felt that Voldemort wasn't quite focused upon in this bit, but I suppose he is not in the level of threats. Not yet anyway. He's but one person. An Alpha class threat. Even teaming up with others, like Selene, I feel he will be annihilated later even with all his newfound powers. Between Wanda, Loki, and Harry, Voldemort is but a speck. Add Dumbledore and the avengers to the mix and he is probably not even a threat... Not unless you give him something to level the field. Like an infinity stone. (I hope you don't do it. I don't remember what happened to Voldemort in the graveyard scene or whatever equivalent there was. But I will read and find out.)
Sinister is a nice touch and so is Maddeline. The red room made Natasha and the Winter Soldier. Of course they're fucking dangerous. (On a completely unrelated note, I feel that it would be quite hilarious if you have Natasha take Voldemort out. Maybe an omake but it will be hilarious if she just ends Voldemort by putting a bullet in his head.)
Something I REALLY loved was how Harry went after Maddie/Rachel. Most authors would mold Harry to a new personality and forget all about his- for a lack of better word, hero complex where he would put others, especially those he loves, before himself. He died for his friends in canon after all. But you kept it there which was something I really liked.
I will go through the next part fast and hope to make it to the other side of the Red-room arc as soon as possible. I may not share my thoughts of the arc cause the thought of child-abuse disturbs me. Makes me want to strangle them, really. Those and rapists. I might be back with a review at the end of this arc, but it might or might not be pretty. Of course, if it isn't pretty, you should applaud yourself on the writing. Umbridge was so well written that everyone loathes her. A true villian.
Till next time.
HP66
Lohoydo chapter 38 . 1/5
You have inspired me to write an omake. Something that, while it has happened before, I have never actually followed through on. Very speech heavy, and probably a bit too well spoken on Harry's part, but I just can't see him going along with limiters.

"First of all, I should inform you that your participation in the Triwizard Tournament will come with conditions," Dumbledore said. "Your psychic abilities will be restrained, though not completely deactivated, as on discussion it was deemed that this struck the best balance between maintaining a competitive balance and your own safety... as it were."

Harry thought for a moment before simply replying, "Declined."
"Pardon me?" asked Dumbledore.
"Professor, I decline to agree to your modification of the rules." Harry explained. "These are rule changes you are attempting to apply to a single competitor after the start of the tournament. This is equivalent to saying 'that competitor is better than the others, they should be handicapped,' which goes against the concept of the selecting the best to compete. Is Krum being prevented from flying? Is Delacour being prevented from using any advantages her Veela ancestry grants her? Is Cedric... being prevented from accepting help from other Hufflepuffs?
"No, Professor, if I was selected it means I am considered by the Goblet to be the best competitor under the conditions it selected for and attempting to enforce a limit on my abilities would be an attempt to violate fair competition.
"Furthermore, for my own safety I must refuse any external limiters. As you are quite aware, there are many people after me for one reason or another, and would love the opportunity presented by my abilities being restricted even for a moment." At this point Bucky smiled slightly and nodded in agreement. "Therefore, Professor, for the many reasons I have stated, and more beside, I must refuse your limiters and will respond to any forceful attempt to limit me as an assault and attempted kidnapping."
Nodding gravely, Dumbledore took a moment to think. "You raise excellent points Harry, and well spoken. I will discuss this with the other judges. Perhaps you would agree to self limit what powers you actually use during the competition?"
Harry began to nod, but paused and considered for a moment, looking into the distance as he thought, before shaking his head. "I don't believe that would be fair to the other competitors. If I agreed to limitations and still won, it would merely highlight the differences between myself and them. If I were limited and lost, people would always question how much of it was their skill vs my limitations.
"I think... ", at this point Harry trailed off as he pondered his next words, "I think that what might be best is that I give it an honest try in the spirit of competition, and the grading is done based on a regular witch or wizard. This might mean I get a perfect score, but the others should be scored as though I weren't participating. Then, at the end, assuming I win, I would step back. I should not be in the tournament and you're right in that it is not fair, so the champions I beat should regain their lost spot. I would ask that you keep that idea to yourself however, as I don't want it bandied about through the year."
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